My Little Lodger!
by tii-chan17
Summary: -Set before Ichigo appears- After an accident with a kido spell gone awry, Hitsugaya's house is reduced to a pile of smoking rubble. Under pressure from her crippling guilt, Rangiku decides to let him stay with her. Doesn't that sound like a good idea?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Wooo! New fic! This idea came to me at...hm...around two am. I'd eaten a LOT of chocolate, so I was still awake, I can't really do caffeine...but anyway! So, this idea came to me, and I started choking with giggle fits! I don't think anyone heard, but I must've sounded pretty strange...**

**So...as you can probably guess, this is a Humour! Brilliant, I can't really write anything else...**

**Annnd...this chapter's a prologue. So it's really short. Only around 650 words! But don't worry, actual chapters'll be longer...I don't really like to have anything under 1000 words...but I can't proof-read more than 2000 properly, so expect something in between those two numbers! :)**

**I've just broken up for my Xmas vacation, (WOO!) so updates will be quite fast, (hopefully, I'm not promising anything!) IF I get enough reviews! I enjoy reviews. I ain't gonna deny it. And I'm not just going to post this fic for fun, either. So, if you want this updated, PLEASE REVIEW! Oh, and also, please read every A/N I put up, because there is a reason I do these things, and it could say something important like 'THIS FIC WILL BE ON HIATUS FOR A WHILE' or something. But don't worry, this fic probably won't be going on hiatus. That was just an example. XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to...(wait for it)...KUBO TITE! Yayy! Although I do wish I owned the manga...and Ulquiorra. And Shinji. And Gin. And Hitsugaya. And Yukio. And-yeah, I think you get the idea now.  
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The Beginning

It was a normal day in the Tenth Division barracks. Hitsugaya-taicho was working. Matsumoto-fukutaicho was not.

"Taiiichoooo?" Matsumoto drawled, busily painting her nails a very pretty shade of pink.

"Yes, Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya didn't look up from his work.

"Why are you always doing paperwork? Isn't that so boring?"

"I can't exactly say it's fun, but I don't really have a choice when you do _absolutely no work whatsoever_, now do I?" Hitsugaya countered, a vein popping in his forehead. It seemed to be doing that a lot these days.

"It's not my fault! It takes time to stay this beautiful!" Matsumoto reasoned, finishing her nails and waving them about in the air to dry them.

Her taicho rolled his eyes. "Sure."

"And I do work! Sometimes…"

He raised an eyebrow and finally turned around to eye his second in command. "Do you now?"

"Yeah! In fact, I worked…this morning!" Rangiku informed him heatedly.

"And what did you do?"

"I dropped off those papers from the Second Division that you asked for!"

"Really?"

"Uh huh!" she confirmed.

"So exactly why haven't I found them anywhere yet?" Hitsugaya dared to ask.

"Well…I was tired, and it's such a long way from the Second Division to here…so I dumped them at your house." Rangiku finished cheerfully.

Hitsugaya let his head fall to the table with a thump. "And _how_, pray tell, did you manage do find your way into my house?"

"Duh! I stole your keys! You should really be more careful, taicho."

Hitsugaya sprang up and checked his belt for the non-existent keys. "Matsumoto. Your position as fukutaicho is in great danger. You can't just go around nicking your superior officers' keys!"

"Naw…you wouldn't fire me really!"

"Don't bet on it." he deadpanned.

"So…are you going to go fetch those papers?" Rangiku asked him.

"Funny you should ask, Matsumoto. I seem to have mislaid my keys." he reminded her sarcastically.

"Oh yeah! Whoops. Here you go, Taicho-chan!" she handed them over.

"What did you just call me?"

"Nothing!" she called over her shoulder, already well out of the office door.

"Wait a second, Matsumoto! I'm not letting you out of my sight! You seem to get distracted from work much too easily these days." Toushiro called after her, sighing heavily when he realised she was already out of earshot. He flash stepped after her.

…

"…What is the meaning of this, Matsumoto?"

"Uh…" For once in her life, Rangiku was surprisingly speechless.

Upon entering Hitsugaya's private quarters, they'd met what seemed to be a hurricane site. Paper lay strewn everywhere; all over the floor, under the sofa. Hell, there were even a couple up on the shelf!

Hitsugaya's teal eyes strayed to the culprit of the mess: an open window.

"Matsumoto. I know for a fact that I closed all the windows before I left."

"Ah…About that! I, uh, felt it was a bit stuffy in here when I came in this morning, so I opened the window. Must have forgotten to close it! Silly me!" Matsumoto rambled, smacking her head comically with her palm.

Hitsugaya groaned and rubbed his temples. "This is going to take hours to clean up…" he muttered under his breath.

Unfortunately, Rangiku had very good ears. "Not to worry, taicho, I can fix this in a jiffy!" she declared cheerily. Before he could stop her, she muttered a quick kido incantation under her breath and made the necessary hand signs.

"No! Matsumoto, wait—"

The ensuing explosion was felt all over Seireitei.

…

Matsumoto and Hitsugaya stood in what once may have been Hitsugaya's house, but was now just a pile of charred rubble. The two themselves were pretty much indistinguishable from each other, except from height and figure. They were both covered head to toe in identical outfits of oily black soot.

Hitsugaya wiped some gunk off his eyes. "Matsumotoooo…"

To Be Continued

**A/N: Lols...Rangiku's in big trouble now! I wonder what that kido was...? Oh well, it's probably a good thing I don't know, else I'd end up exploding the entire WORLD by accident or something stupid like that...so like me. XP**


	2. Settling Down

**A/N: WOOT! Quick update! Long one too, I really surpassed myself today! Annnnd, I have an idea for how I'm going to continue this fic, because I only had a REALLY vague idea for it when I started. Basically, you reviewers can request words to be the title of chapters, and then I'll write about whatever comes into my head from said word. Kinda like the song requests in my last fic, Busking, but less hassle for me if no one requests!**

**Awesome reception of the prologue! Yayy! So I'll be continuing this fic...XD**

**People to thank:**

**10WeaponsKuniochi10**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Ziya Hitsugaya**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**dragonick711**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**sagitgirlth**

**chesxca**

**Writring Bunny**

**crazy-ghost-girl**

**and Kittizovics! Woah. That is a lot of people. And for the first chapter too! YAYYYY! *freaks out completely* So, I decided to reward all of ya'll with a first proper chapter! Hope you like it!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. Except Shinji. *Gets evil death-glare from copyright people* Okay, I don't own him either...*sniff*  
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Settling Down

The destruction of Hitsugaya Toushiro's house was currently a hot topic among the Shinigami Womens' Association. Especially as their access to Rangiku provided them with a huge amount of detail on the subject.

"…and then I said the kido spell, but I must've got a bit wrong, 'cos everything suddenly went BOOM, and then taicho was really dirty and I was really dirty and my hair got ruined and then taicho got really mad at me and then I kept apologizing but he wouldn't listen and then—"

"Yes, thank you, Rangiku-san." Nanao interrupted Matsumoto's recount of the tale.

Rangiku proceeded to gasp for breath, revealing she hadn't inhaled for nearly a minute. "So there you have it!" she finished cheerily.

"Is Shiro-chan really mad at you still?" Yachiru asked her, bouncing onto the other vice-captain's lap.

"Well…I don't really know. Probably. I've been avoiding him all day just in case!"

"Yeah, 'cos I saw him just now going to Old Dude's office an' he looked really mad…" Yachiru informed her, putting a small finger to her bottom lip.

Rangiku's face paled visibly.

"What?" she gasped.

…

Matsumoto was flash-stepping extremely fast towards the soutaicho's office. Had her mini-captain really decided to finally fire her? Why else would he go to their commanding officer's quarters?

Rangiku groaned quietly as she ran; contrary to common belief, Rangiku did actually care about her job, and she didn't want to be repositioned to some other squad…that'd be awful. Unless Ukitake-taicho accepted her, (which was, unfortunately, unlikely) she wouldn't be able to be a fukutaicho anymore.

Spurred on by her doom-filled thoughts, Rangiku concentrated even more reiatsu to the soles of her feet and positively flew towards her destination.

…

"Yes, Hitsugaya-taicho?" Captain-Commander Yamamoto questioned when he looked up to see the young captain in front of his desk.

"I was wondering, sir…I trust you know my house has been…demolished."

Yamamoto suppressed a chuckle. "Yes. Matsumoto-fukutaicho's work, I presume?"

A vein popped in the small boy's head. "Yes." he onfirmed curtly. "Well, I was wondering whether—"

_Crash!_

Yamamoto and Hitsugaya snapped around to see an extremely broken-looking door and a rather flustered-looking Matsumoto standing where it should have been.

"Matsumoto? What is the meaning of this?" Hitsugaya interrogated angrily. Great, now she was taking to ruining other captains' property as well.

"Don't fire me, taicho! I'll do anything! I won't laze around in the office, I won't break your stuff, I'll even do paperwork! Just please don't fire me!" Matsumoto begged, throwing herself on the floor in front of his feet.

"…Huh?" was all Toushiro could manage.

Then Rangiku turned to Yamamoto. "Please soutaicho sir, don't let him fire me, you wouldn't want me to waste away with sadness, now would you?" she babbled.

"Matsumoto-fukutaicho, please refrain from entering hysterics." the Captain-Commander cautioned.

"But—"

"Matsumoto!" a now extremely irritated Hitsugaya interrupted. "What on earth do you think you're doing?"

Rangiku turned a nervous eye back to her captain. Oh, he was _pissed_ now.

"I demand to know why you destroyed the soutaicho's door, prostrated yourself at my feet, and begged me not to _fire _you, of all things!" Hitsugaya continued.

"Huh?" Rangiku's thunder had been stolen. "You…weren't going to ask for me to be fired?"

"No." Toushiro rubbed his temples. "Why would I do that?"

"Well…I kinda trashed your house…" Rangiku reminded him.

"…" Hitsugaya looked even more annoyed.

"So what were you doing here, then?" Rangiku asked quizzically.

"I was going to request for my house to be rebuilt, actually. I'm not sure my division's up to it." he informed her, raising an eyebrow pointedly at the last sentence.

"…Oh." was all Rangiku could manage. That was embarrassing.

"So, as you can see, there is no danger of you losing your position. Good day, Matsumoto." Hitsugaya dismissed his vice-captain coldly.

While Rangiku gathered her bearings, Hitsugaya turned once more to the soutaicho. "However sir, I am not in possession of another accommodation. I was also going to request if a place where I could live could be found."

"Ah…we are quite tight on space…I think Zaraki-taicho may have a room free…" Yamamoto mused. At the shock and dread apparent on Hitsugaya's face, he added, "But maybe that isn't quite to your liking?"

"Well…"

"I could house him, sir!" a still-there Rangiku cut in.

"Matsumoto, that is not appropri—"

"Ah, thank you Matsumoto-fukutaicho. Your offer is much appreciated; I really don't think there is anywhere else Hitsugaya-taicho could go." Yamamoto smiled. The soutaicho had always had rather a soft spot for causing mischief among his subordinates.

"But Yamamoto-soutaicho—" Hitsugaya protested, only to be cut off by Rangiku.

"Okay, thanks very much, sir! We'll just be going now!" she dragged her captain out of the room.

"Well well well…this may prove to be rather entertaining…" the soutaicho mused, smiling mischievously to himself.

…

"Matsumoto! Why did you offer to house me?" Hitsugaya was getting a headache, which did not lengthen his temper span.

"Well…I did break your house…a bit…so, I guess I felt guilty!" Rangiku informed him.

Toushiro sighed. "And do you even have a spare bedroom?"

"Of course! Who do you think I am, inviting my captain to come and stay with me if I didn't even have a room where he could sleep?" she scoffed, quite offended at his question.

"You didn't exactly invite me…" Hitsugaya muttered.

"Anyway! Here we are! My place! D'ya like it?" Rangiku asked him eagerly.

Toushiro appraised the building for a moment. "It's exactly like all the other vice-captains' houses." he stated.

"Well, yeah. But the inside's different!" she sang, pulling him through the front door.

When they stopped just inside the doorway, Hitsugaya's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. Matsumoto's house was very…bright. There was a cyan couch with a magenta spread, a crimson-painted shelf and a shiny metal coffee table. At least, that's what he thought there was, underneath all the other clutter that occupied her living-room.

"So…do you like it?" she questioned again.

"I'm going to have to, aren't I?" he smoothly avoided the question.

"I guess, yeah. Oh well! I'm going to go make dinner! You wanna help?" she offered.

"Nah. I'm tired. Didn't get much sleep last night, for some mysterious reason." he said sarcastically, referring to his rather uncomfortable night on Hinamori's couch.

"Right. Sorry about that again." Rangiku apologised sheepishly.

"Don't mention it." said Hitsugaya. At her disbelieving expression, he added, "No, really. Don't mention it. I don't wanna think about the six months I'm going to be without a house more than I have to."

"_Six months_?" Rangiku squeaked.

"Yeah. They've got to completely rebuild my house, remember, Matsumoto?"

"Yeah, but…why so long?" she asked, still in shock.

"You think you can build it faster?" He raised an eyebrow.

"…" Rangiku hurriedly exited to the kitchen.

…

"Matsumoto. What exactly is this?" Toushiro looked at the plate in front of him in something akin to disgust.

"Smoked fish with pickle, strawberry syrup and wasabi!" she informed him. Hitsugaya recoiled in horror, only just preventing himself from vomiting.

"That's not food! That's disgusting!" he cried, pointing a shaking finger at the plate of strange-looking food.

"No it's not, just unusual. It's really nice, actually." Matsumoto informed him, taking a chew out of her own plateful. Hitsugaya stared in disbelief as she swallowed her mouthful. "See?"

"…I think I'll cook my own dinner from now on." Toushiro made a beeline for the kitchen door. He should have known Matsumoto had…strange taste in food as well as all the other rubbish she enjoyed.

**A/N: Ah, lol. Matsumoto's crap cooking...who do you think is worse, Orihime or Rangiku?**

**Hmm, I wonder why Matsumoto was so anxious not to be fired...some hidden feelings there perhaps...? Or maybe not! You guys'll only find out if you review! (Blackmail, I know. But it still stands.) XD**


	3. Hospital

**A/N: Heyya! Just thought I'd say, I am really enjoying this fic! So...funny...XD**

**So, this is my first word request, thank you very much to TheSecondQuincy, this was a brill prompt! I hope you like this chapter as much as I do!**

**And, in case you missed it last chapter, I AM NOW OPEN TO WORD REQUESTS! Basically, in your review, you suggest a word I could use for a title for a chapter in this fic, and then I'll try my hardest to come up with something good about it! Win-win, guys, how can you resist?**

**Awesome response to last chapter, look at what I found in my inbox~~**

**Reviews and favourites from:**

**TheSecondQuincy**

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**chesxca**

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**iStoleUrCupcake, aka Rainbow Fruit Loop, but she lost the password to her modern account and used her old one. Imagine my confusion when it was signed Rainbow Fruit Loop! Lolz...**

**the super-cute anonymous reviewer**

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**and Saikilimano! That is a lot of people. Twelve, I believe. Wow... ~~**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to the amazing Kubo Tite! Oh, and btw, who wants to help me get a petition round for him to make Ulquiorra part of public property for fangirls all over? If that's you, PLEASE REVIEW AND TELL ME! (That was a joke by the way, but you can still review!)  
><strong>

Hospital

"_Huh? Where am I?" _

_Hitsugaya was floating in darkness. Now and then, short flashes of unbearably bright colour would over-stimulate his senses. They weren't just colours. Each of them had their own different _smell _as well. That neon green, for instance, smelled distinctively of cheap fabric conditioner. And that cyan blue, well, it smelled of shampoo and his own scent. And then there was that unmistakeable smell of tea, but for the life of him he couldn't figure out what colour _that _was supposed to be._

"_Taiiichooo…taiiiiichooo!"_

_What the hell? What was Matsumoto's voice doing in his dream?_

"_Taicho! You'd better wake up now!"_

'_Go the hell away', he felt like saying._

"_Taicho, you'll be late for work."_

_So what? Who the hell—_

"Work!" Hitsugaya snapped straight up in bed, effectively head butting Matsumoto in the chin.

"Ow!" she exclaimed, injured.

"Wah! Wha-what are you doing here, Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya panicked, realising her voice had _not _been part of his strange dream. And nor had anything else, for that matter. The neon green was the ridiculous duvet Matsumoto had provided him with, and the horribly clashing blue was his pillow.

"What do you mean, 'What am I doing here'?" Matsumoto asked, slightly hurt. "I'm bringing you tea, of course!"

So that was why he'd smelt tea. "Matsumoto, I don't have time, I need to get to wor—_Woah_!" Toushiro had scrambled to his feet during his previous sentence, but as a result of his fatigue and the shiny, highly-polished floor in Matsumoto's spare room, he slipped rather dramatically and was currently headed on a very fast journey to said floor.

Before his head could make contact with the wood, Hitsugaya felt strong hands under his arms, pulling him upright again.

"Be careful, taicho, you could have hurt yourself!" Matsumoto scolded him lightly, picking him up without strain (to his emphatic protestations) and dumping him unceremoniously back on the bed.

"I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself, Matsumoto!" her captain replied, peeved.

"I know! But only after a cuppa, eh, taicho?" she teased, wafting the mug under his nose enticingly.

"Matsumoto, I have already informed you that—"

"Oh, be quiet for a minute, taicho!" Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. Apparently, she was even _more_ brash and tactless in her own home. "You need to wake up, and I'm sure Third Seat-san'll be able to take care of a few minutes when his taicho's not in. Now, drink the tea, and _then_ you can get dressed and go to work."

Hitsugaya's face flushed a bright pink when he realised he was in nothing more than his boxers. "Matsumoto…"

"Shh! I don't mind, 's not like I haven't seen anything like that before!" she shushed him. Her captain raised an eyebrow at her, and then it was her turn to blush slightly. "I meant, in battles and stuff…you know?" she hastily amended.

"Whatever," he shook his head slightly at her blundering and took the tea from her. "Thank you, Matsumoto." he acknowledged.

"No problem, taicho!" she beamed, waiting expectantly for a decree on the quality of her tea.

Hitsugaya gently blew away the steam from the mug and lifted the rim to his lips. He took a sip…

…And immediately spat it out again all over the blanket.

"Taicho! What's wrong?" the alarmed fukutaicho called, trying and failing to calm down the young captain, who was currently spitting desperately to get the taste out of his mouth.

"Matsumoto," he finally managed to gasp, "What the _hell_ is this?"

"It's the new herbal tea I got from the market a couple of days ago." Matsumoto explained. "Why? Is there something wrong with it?"

"It's absolutely disgusting!"

"…Oh. Well, in that case, let me take that from you!" she said cheerily, taking the warm mug from her captain's hand. She got up to go tip the vile concoction down the sink, but, in the process, forgot how much she'd polished the floor that weekend. Down went Matsumoto, and up went the tea.

Both taicho and fukutaicho (who had caught herself on the edge of the bed) watched with despair as the mug arced gracefully through the air before landing on the bed, depositing its entire piping-hot contents on Hitsugaya's bare chest.

The resulting scream from the small captain was nothing short of deafening.

…

"Don't worry, taicho, everything's going to be a-okay!" Matsumoto reassured him as she carried the convulsing captain through Seireitei, wrapped in a blanket.

"Matsumoto…I am going to _kill_ you…" he spat through gritted teeth.

His second in command gulped. He sounded very serious about that particular death threat. Maybe he'd be more lenient when his second-degree burns had been healed.

"Matsumoto-san? What on earth happened?" the Fourth's worried lieutenant asked as they entered the Fourth Division building, peering at Hitsugaya's contorted face under the swathes of blanket.

"Uh…I kinda spilt scalding hot tea on him. Is Unohana-taicho free?" Matsumoto asked anxiously.

"Yes, I believe she is. Come right this way." Isane lead them to a door, knocking on it and announcing, "Matsumoto-fukutaicho and Hitsugaya-taicho here to see you, Unohaha-taicho." before opening it and letting the pair in.

"Ah, Matsumoto-fukutaicho. What seems to be the problem?" Unohana asked calmly, not expressing any surprise at all at the growling Toushiro bundled up in bed sheets.

"Well, actually, Unohana-taicho, it's Hitsugaya-taicho. I spilt tea on him." Matsumoto explained sheepishly.

"Ah, may I see?"

"Well, I'm not sure what he's saying, but…yeah, I think you can." Matsumoto hurriedly set down the furious captain before he could take a swing at her.

Unohana gently unwrapped the blankets to reveal extremely nasty-looking burns covering the small captain's chest. Rangiku winced, more than a little ashamed at her clumsiness with mugs of hot tea.

"Yes, these will need quite a lot of treatment. Matsumoto-fukutaicho, would you care to pass me the burn cream over there?" Unohana requested, thanking the blonde with a small smile when the ointment was passed to her.

She rubbed the paste in very carefully, avoiding any particularly sore-looking spots and choosing to simply apply a thin layer of cream and leave it there to soak in by itself on those particular areas.

When all the burns had been taken care of, Unohana wrapped the small captain's chest with bandages and tucked in the loose end.

"He should be well and ready to work again by tomorrow, Matsumoto-fukutaicho. Until then, I think it would be wise if you stayed with him to make sure he doesn't strain himself." Unohana advised, well-versed in Hitsugaya's attempts to work in the most inconvenient of circumstances.

"I am conscious, you know." Hitsugaya muttered ungratefully, ignoring Matsumoto's outstretched hand and choosing to push himself to his feet painfully instead. "Thank you, Unohana-san." he said simply, walking out of the room with Matsumoto trailing behind him, looking nervous.

…

"…Taicho?" Matsumoto started hesitantly, fearing her captain's wrath.

"What is it, Matsumoto?" came the curt reply.

"I really am sorry about the tea. And the house. And the food. It looks like I'm just a walking disaster-area." Matsumoto apologised, visibly deflating at each shortcoming she listed.

"Too right you are."

As Matsumoto raised her eyes to his in surprise, she saw a rare glimpse of humour in his teal orbs, causing her to give him a faint smile.

He returned it without hesitation. "I guess it isn't completely your fault you can't seem to help ruining everything you touch." he mused jokingly.

"Yep! I'm incurable, me! No matter how many hospitals you take me to!" his vice-captain chirped, 'cured' of her slight depression of a moment ago. "C'mon, taicho. Let's go home." she said, already setting off in the direction of her house.

"You home; maybe. My home? No." Hitsugaya said, following behind her while blatantly ignoring the strange looks he was getting. Obviously it wasn't every day people saw shinigami captains in their underwear, covered with bandages.

**A/N: And there you have it! I loved this one! Humour was thrown around with reckless abandon! My fave type of fic! And personally, I'm glad Hitsugaya forgave his lieutenant, 'cos admit it, this fic would suck if he was mad at her all the time!**

**Now, I checked the stats for this fic, and I had a grand total of 108 visitors to the last chapter! WOOT! However, did I get 108 reviews? No. I don't particularly mind, because those who are reviewing are awesome, but please, if you're reading this, review! You have no idea how uplifting it is to my morale, and it speeds up chapter production! I accept anonymous reviewers, and pretty much anything except flames.**

**So~~~hopefully I'll get another word request and see you guys soon in the next chapter! Byeee! x**


	4. Fangirls

**A/N: Here's another update! I don't like this one much...seems a bit far-fetched. But it's funny anyway, and as this was a word request, I kinda felt obliged to do it. Don't get me wrong, it was an awesome word request! It's just my chapter that's kind of...iffy. That doesn't make me open to flames, though! NO FLAMING!**

**Credit for this word prompt and the basic idea for the chapter goes to TheSecondQuincy! (Again!) WOO! And thank you for the suggestion for a plot line for this chapter too, I couldn't come up with a different one and then this update wouldn't exist...that was messed-up logic.**

**I think I had my biggest response ever to the last chapter, and the huge majority of it was good, so THANKS TO ALL OF YOU!**

**Here they are!**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**Writing bunny**

**Winter Lover in the Snow**

**The. Evil. Squirrel**

**xXForgottenMelodyXx**

**hitsufan**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Emerald Tsukino**

**diamondarrowmage**

**bandgirlz**

**and AoMythology! Thirteen! We're steadily moving up! Thanks to all of you! Hug hug, kiss kiss! x**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of it's characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite for his amazing manga! which STILL hasn't been updated...aw. :(  
><strong>

Fangirls

"…Matsumoto? Why are you locking all the doors and windows?" To say Hitsugaya was confused was an understatement.

"Well, I hate to break it to you, taicho, but I got some _really_ nasty looks from some of the unseated shinigami girls while we were walking back from the Fourth. And I don't know about you, but _I _certainly don't want to come back from telling Third Seat-san what to do while we're away to find my house trashed and my taicho smothered to death by a Killer Hug."

"…_What?_" Matsumoto's 'explanation' hadn't been very helpful.

"Huh? What do you mean, 'what'? Wow, taicho, I thought you were a child genius and all that jazz."

The vein in her captain's forehead popped. Again. "Matsumoto! I have absolutely no idea what you're blathering on about!"

"Your _fangirls_, taicho. Surely you know about them?"

"…Fangirls?"

"Yes! There's a club and everything! They're scary…I get death glares just for working in the same office as you!"

"Matsumoto…you don't work in the office. Or at all, really. And why would my so-called 'fangirls' come here anyway? They've never hijacked me before. If they even exist."

"They do, taicho! And they're out for the kill!" his lieutenant warned him. "Apparently they're not happy about the fact that you're staying with me."

"So why would they come today, of all days?"

"Think about it, taicho. When is the best time to attack an enemy?"

"Enemy? I thought you said they were my—"

"It comes to the same thing! You're going to die either way." Matsumoto waved him off.

"…Right. Well, in that case, it would be best to attack the enemy at their weakest time."

"Correct, taicho! And right now, you are sporting second degree burns, are bandaged so tightly you can barely move, and I am about to leave you _alone_ in a completely unguarded house for at least a quarter of an hour." Matsumoto listed, ticking each factor off her fingers one at a time.

Hitsugaya's face was completely blank. Then comprehension dawned. "Oh crap."

"My thoughts exactly, taicho! So, could you allow me to continue with the barring of the entry points, please?"

…

Hitsugaya sat tensely in the armchair Matsumoto had left him in. She had said she'd be back as soon as she could, but his fukutaicho was notorious for her lack of time-keeping skills.

The young captain started suddenly when a soft noise was heard from outside the closed window.

_Oh God…_he thought. _No, I'm being stupid. It's just an animal or something. Wait. Didn't Zaraki kill all of the wildlife in Seireitei when he last lost control of his reiatsu?_

Hitsugaya jumped to his feet, then immediately fell over. Damn. Those bandages were not helping things. Why did Matsumoto find it necessary to bandage his legs as well? Idiot lieutenant…

"I heard a noise! He's in there!" came a hushed whisper from outside.

_What? No!_ Hitsugaya thought desperately. Lost for what else to do, he suppressed his reiatsu and stayed as quiet as a mouse.

"_Charge!_"

Too late.

…

"Taicho?" Matsumoto re-entered her house, looking for her young captain.

She was faced with an empty armchair, a smashed window and the unmistakable remnants of a struggle.

"Oh dear…"

…

"Nanao-san! Nanao-san!"

The Eighth Division lieutenant looked up from her paperwork at the sound of Matsumoto's voice.

"Matsumoto-san?"

_Crash!_

Nanao rolled her eyes. "Matsumoto-san, I know you're making a hobby of destroying things, but does my office door have to be a part of it?"

"Nanao-san, it's terrible!" Matsumoto ignored her. "Taicho's been kidnapped!"

"What? By who?"

"The _Hitsugaya-taicho Fanclub_…" Matsumoto informed her, her eyes wide with horror.

Ise raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "And?"

"They'll kill him!"

"No they won't! They just won't give him back for a while." Nanao said, exasperated.

"But then who's gonna do the paperwork?"

"…"

"Nanao-chan, you can't force Rangiku-san to do all of the paperwork while Toushiro-kun's…otherwise engaged. That's completely unfair!" came the laidback voice of Kyoraku Shunsui, who had just entered the office.

"You seem to think it's perfectly alright to let _me_ do all the paperwork!"

"Well, you seem to enjoy it. Now, Rangiku-san, what do you suggest we do about Toushiro-kun's predicament?" the captain turned to the still-hyperventilating Matsumoto.

"We get him out of there! Duh!"

"…Yes, Rangiku-san, but _how_? I know for a fact their base is practically impenetrable."

"Really? How, may I ask?" Nanao inquired acidly.

Her captain conveniently ignored her. "So, as I was saying! What do you suggest we do, Rangiku-san?" he repeated.

"Well…we'll have to get a rescue team of sorts. I wonder who could help…" Rangiku mused, putting a finger on her chin.

"Well, Juushiro will be happy to lend us a hand, and his third seats go wherever he does, so that's already six!" Kyoraku chanted happily.

"…Why am I being included in this?" Nanao rubbed her temples. She was ignored again.

"And Abarai-kun and Hisagi-san'll definitely help! Anything to get off work!" Matsumoto contributed.

"Yes, but it may be hard to get their captains to agree to this…neither of them have a sense of humour." Kyoraku reminded her.

"Well, Tousen-taicho is on a mission in the Living World, and Kuchiki-taicho…uh...maybe you could get him to help us as well…?" Rangiku tried tentatively.

Kyoraku scratched his chin. "Well…I'm almost completely sure he won't listen to a word I say, but I can always try!" he said optimistically.

"Great! Nanao-san, could you spread word to the Shinigami Womens' Association that all available members need to report to the Tenth Division office as soon as possible, please?" Rangiku asked the irritated lieutenant.

Ise tutted. "I may as well. Looks like you two idiots aren't going to let this go, so…"

"Thank you, my lovely Nanao-chan!" Kyoraku called as he and Rangiku shunpoed out of the office.

"…I am so going to demand extra wage for this." Nanao rubbed the bridge of her nose.

…

Matsumoto, Kyoraku, Hisagi, Kira (who the original pair had met on their way out of the Eighth Division), Ukitake, Kiyone and Sentarou were all gathered round the door to the Sixth Division office, waiting nervously for it to be opened.

"Yes?" came the stoic voice of Kuchiki Byakuya. When he saw the huge crowd gathered outside his door, he raised an eyebrow. "Is there an emergency?"

Matsumoto was pushed forward by a nervous Hisagi and Kira. "Ah, well, you see, Kuchiki-taicho…" she stalled, trying to think what to say.

"Please get to the point, Matsumoto-fukutaicho."

"Uh, yeah. Well, taicho's been kidnapped by his fanclub, and we were wondering if we could borrow Abarai-kun to help get him out…?" Matsumoto tried.

"Permission denied." Byakuya made to slam the door in their faces.

Kyoraku deftly shoved his foot in the gap. "Come on, Byakuya-kun! It _is_ an emergency! Of a sort…"

"I refuse to let Abarai take part in this ridiculous scheme. He has paperwork to finish." Byakuya deadpanned.

"I already did it, Kuchiki-taicho." the redhead surprised everyone by saying, appearing in the doorway behind his captain.

Byakuya turned and faced him. He raised an eyebrow sceptically. "Indeed?"

"Yeah. Only just now, though. Started really early in the morning so I could go take an afternoon nap, see?" his lieutenant explained.

"I see. In that case, Abarai, you are free to do whatever you wish for the rest of the day. But don't be late again tomorrow morning." The Kuchiki head informed him, making to go back into his office.

Ukitake caught his sleeve and was subsequently fixed with an ice-cold glare. He hurriedly let go. "Byakuya-san, would you please consider coming with us yourself? I'm sure Hitsugaya-kun would appreciate it, and he may well do you a favour in return." the white-haired captain shamelessly bribed him.

_He won't!_ Matsumoto scoffed silently.

"…Very well then." Everyone's eyes bugged out of their sockets. "It doesn't seem as if I have anything more constructive to do, anyway." the noble reasoned, stepping outside along with his fukutaicho.

"Ah, excellent! Thank you, Byakuya-kun! Now, we proceed to the Tenth Division!" Kyoraku announced dramatically.

…

"Ah! Nanao-san! You brought everyone here!" Matsumoto exclaimed, giving the smaller woman an engulfing hug.

Nanao struggled free. "Not everyone. Unohana-taicho and Kotetsu-san are very busy right now. Apparently, there was a fight in the Eleventh Division yesterday."

"Yeah, and like the pansies they are, Madarame and Ayasegawa got wasted. So they ain't here." the looming form of Eleventh Division captain Zaraki Kenpachi informed them.

Yachiru popped up over his shoulder. "That's right! Can we go find Shiro-chan now? I wanna see Ken-chan beat up some people!" she exclaimed excitedly.

"Uh, sure. The sooner the better, I guess. Poor taicho, he's probably feeling desperate." Matsumoto was engulfed in a wave of sympathy.

"I'm sure it's not that bad, Matsumoto-san." Kira comforted her.

"Yes, Rangiku-san, you mustn't get so het up. Hisugaya-kun is perfectly capable of taking care of himself." Ukitake added.

"Not with his entire body bandaged, he isn't." Matsumoto said morosely.

Everyone stopped and stared.

"Matsumoto-san, for God's sake, _why_ did you feel the need to bandage his whole body when it was only his chest that got burned?" Nanao could feel a headache coming on.

"Well…I wanted to practice my bandaging skills…Just in case, you know?" Matsumoto explained.

"Well…if that's true, we're going to need to get him out of there _fast_. Come on everyone." Nanao commanded, quickly assuming the lead.

They all followed her out of the office door and towards the Hitsugaya-taicho Fanclub base.

…

"Come now, Toushiro-kun. Please stop struggling. We need to take some pictures of you." The voice of a female unseated shinigami that he didn't recognize was quickly shaving away at Hitsugaya's temper fuse.

"For the last time, no! I refuse to be put upon in this undignified manner! And for the love of _God, call me Hitsugaya-taicho already_!" he yelled.

"Shh, Toushiro-kun. We wouldn't want your bitch of a lieutenant coming after us and finding you, now would we?" the nameless shinigami hushed him.

"Well, I don't know about you, but I certainly would! Matsumoto! Anyone? Help me!" Hitsugaya called, straining at the ropes he'd been tied up with. "And what is this, anyway? Why do you feel the need to tie me up?"

"You might run away if we didn't." she reasoned. The other three fangirls behind her nodded silently.

"…Yeah. And maybe there's a reason for that." Hitsugaya deadpanned, trying and failing to crush their belief that he wanted to be here as much as they did.

"Oh, come now! Why would you want to go back to that stupid Matsumoto Rangiku anyway?" I swear, all her brains've been sucked into those humungous boobs of hers." the shinigami scoffed, wrinkling up her nose.

"Stop talking about my fukutaicho in that way! When I get free, I'll have Central 46 come down on all of you like a ton of bricks! And she's plenty intelligent, actually." Hitsugaya retorted, very close to losing his rag.

"No she's not. Come on girls, let's get his top off. We really do need those pictures." The irritating girl snapped her fingers, and the silent shinigami behind her immediately started loosening his shihakusho.

"Hey! Get your hands off me!" Hitsugaya shouted, furious. He aimed a kick at one of the girls, but she neatly dodged him and continued with her work.

_These damn bandages are really slowing me down…_ HItsugaya complained silently. He was in big trouble if no one found him soon.

"Taicho? Are you in there?"

All four shinigami fangirls froze at the sound of Matsumoto's concerned voice from outside the closed door.

On the other hand, Hitsugaya was overjoyed.

"Matsumoto! Help! They're all insane!"

"Okay, taicho, no need to worry! We'll just get rid of this door!" came Matsumoto's cheery voice again.

_We?_ Hitsugaya managed to think, just before a short range kido blew the door off its hinges. His eyes bugged at the huge group he was suddenly faced with.

"What? Matsumoto, surely you didn't need to bring _quite_ so many—"

"All right, you lot. Step _away_ from the taicho. Or else." Rangiku threatened, putting a hand on the hilt of Haineko.

The shinigami all edged away from him hurriedly.

"Okay, okay. Keep your panties on!" the leader rolled her eyes, trying and failing to look cool, calm and collected.

"Restraint Team! Uh…restrain them!" Matsumoto commanded. She and Nanao had agreed that organisation was the Eighth Division fukutaicho's job while action was Rangiku's.

Kenpachi, Hisagi, Renji and Kyoraku stepped forward to secure each fangirl, while Matsumoto, Ukitake, Kira and the two Thirteenth Division third seats set about loosening Hitsugaya's bonds.

"Poor taicho! What did they do to you?" Matsumoto asked anxiously.

"Not much, actually. I was surprised." Hitsugaya informed them. "They just kidnapped me, brought me to this hell hole, tied me up, annoyed me to distraction and tried to forcefully strip me. I think I got off lightly."

Everyone was speechless.

Then they all turned to glare at the four offending girls.

"What?" they chorused.

…

"So, all's well that ends well, eh, taicho?" Rangiku stretched out on her sofa, turning her head to look at her captain, who was sitting in the armchair he had swiftly commandeered as 'his' when he'd first moved in.

"I guess so. But next time, Matsumoto, don't bandage my whole body when I'm too agonized to stop you. It's not polite." Toushiro scolded her half-heartedly. To tell the truth, he was much too grateful to her for getting him out of the mess to get properly angry with her for getting him into it in the first place.

"So, taicho. How're your burns?"

"All right. I think I'll be able to work tomorrow." he informed her.

"…Tomorrow's Sunday, taicho."

"Well, Monday, then. But I do need to get those papers requesting that all fanclubs of any kind should be banned to the soutaicho as soon as possible."

"Yes, taicho. Of course." Rangiku smiled at him affectionately.

**A/N: Yeah, so, as I said, I don't like it, but I'm very eager to know what you all think! That would be awesome! (I use that word way too much...)**

**I just felt that usually in my fanfics about pairings, I concentrate pretty much solely on the actual two in question and I don't really introduce any other characters, so I wanted to try it out with this chapter! Please tell me if it succeeded or not! XP**

**Hitsugaya's fangirls are a menace, huh? Oh no, wait. EX-fangirls! Yamamoto did ban them. WHO WANTS TO SET UP A NEW CLUB?**

**Lolz...I'm slightly hyper today, so I'd better go now before I make an idiot out of myself. See ya'll in the next chapter!**


	5. DVD

**A/N: So this idea came to me last night, while I was still under the inducement of my mom's evil chocolate pudding, and subsequently couldn't sleep. Apparently, caffeine is excellent for your train of thought. Though I do have a huge headache now. **

**Sorry I couldn't update on Christmas Day, but this is the next best thing, right? Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you had a brilliant day!**

** Credit for this word prompt goes to Rainbow Fruit Loop, who I really must thank, as this is my favourite chapter so far. It was so easy to write, and it wasn't too short either! So, THANK YOU!**

**Brilliant response to the last chapter as well, even though I didn't like it very much. Thank you kindly to:**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**Writing bunny**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**hitsufan**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**fallendestinyxx**

**Yahtzey**

**sagitgirlth**

**Winter Lover in the Snow**

**Thunder Claw03**

**hopelessromantic1470**

**and Bloody Tears of the Black Moon! Wow, that's a lot of people. You guys spoil me so much, I'm going to get used to this many people, and then I'll get depressed if I only get a NORMAL amount! But don't get me wrong: I'm not complaining...ehehehe...**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to The One And Only Kubo Tite! *cheers*  
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DVD

"Are you sure you should be working, taicho? Do you feel okay?" Matsumoto asked for about the fifth time that day.

"Yes, Matsumoto, I'm completely fine! Just as fine as I was ten minutes ago, when you last asked me!" her captain snapped back.

"Okay, okay…I was just worried. Those burns were nasty…" Rangiku furrowed her brow, ashamed at the mere memory.

"The key word in that sentence being 'were', Matsumoto. The burns are almost completely healed. Look," he said, lifting up his kosode to show her the faint marks on his chest.

Matsumoto studied the burns for a longer period of time than necessary, her eyes narrowed in concentration. At last, after about two minutes, she made an affirmative noise in the back of her throat. "Yeah, they are looking better."

"…You took so long just to observe _that_?" Hitsugaya asked incredulously.

"Hm?" It appeared Matsumoto had forgotten what they were talking about. "Oh, no, taicho! I was just thinking your chest was really well-developed for someone your age." she informed him cheerily, smiling at him.

"…" Hitsugaya's face turned red.

"Naw, don't be like that, taicho! It was a compliment!" Matsumoto 'comforted' him, attempting to pat him on the back.

He stepped back lightly, causing her to stumble over his desk that she had reached over in order to acquire access to his shoulder.

"_Matsumoto_!" he yelled. So the red had been anger rather than embarrassment, then. "You can't just go around staring at other peoples' chests! You'll be lucky if I don't file a complaint about your disrespect to the soutaicho!" he warned.

"Well, technically, taicho, you _did_ let me…" Matsumoto reminded him.

Hitsugaya let his head fall to the table with a thud. "That's not the point." he groaned.

"Okay, taicho! Whatever you say!" Rangiku beamed, bored of the current conversation topic.

She looked over at her captain again before sauntering to the office sofa. And then immediately sauntering back.

Hitsugaya regarded her wearily. "Is there a problem, Matsumoto?"

"Now I think about it, taicho, you look really tired. Is anything wrong?" she asked, concerned.

"Well, let's see…maybe I'm _tired_?" Hitsugaya asked sarcastically.

"Obviously. But why? I don't talk in my sleep, do I?" Rangiku looked mildly scared.

"…I don't see how I would know whether you talk in your sleep or not, Matsumoto. My room is on the opposite side of the house to yours, after all." Hitsugaya rolled his eyes.

"Okay, not me, that's good! So why are you tired then?"

"I don't know…it's been a difficult transition from house to house, I guess. I can't seem to get used to it." Toushiro confessed, rubbing his temples lightly. "It's nothing to do with you! It's all me this time, don't fret about it." he added at her mournful expression.

"Right…" Matsumoto still looked sad. Dammit. It was weird when she didn't have a ridiculously huge smile on her face.

"I'll probably get used to it soon, Matsumoto. Don't worry." he tried to console her again.

"And yet I can't help but feel I've failed somewhere. You're my guest; you should feel completely at home." Matsumoto said.

"I will eventually, Matsumoto. But it has only been a week." he reminded her gently.

"Yeah…wait, I know!"

Brilliant. Matsumoto had a brainwave.

"Yes?" he asked nervously. The last brainwave she'd had hadn't ended well.

"We could have a movie night! No one feels not at home after a movie night!" she exclaimed, using appalling grammar.

"A…moo-vee night? What's that?" Toushiro was confused.

"A movie is this thing in the living world…it's like moving pictures on a screen that tell a story." she informed him.

"…A film, then?"

"Yeah, it's another word for film. More modern, you know?" Rangiku shrugged. Hitsugaya had no idea how she managed to keep up with all the modern language in the Living World.

"So where would you get a film? Or one of those massive screen-things?" Hitsugaya asked her. To tell the truth, he was quite excited about this idea. He'd only seen one film in his life, and it had been rather good.

"Well…I heard that Zaraki-taicho has some; for Yachiru, you know? And you don't need a whole cinema screen! A TV works just fine!" she laughed at her taicho's ignorance.

Hitsugaya glared. "Tee-vee? What is that supposed to be?"

"Oh! Television, sorry!"

…She wasn't patronizing him _at all_.

"Whatever. But only after you finish the work, Matsumoto. _All_ of it." he commanded, taking no heed of her groan and pout.

"Yes, taicho…"

Hey, it'd actually worked. He should try bribery more often.

…

"Matsumoto? How did you get one of those…_things_ in here?" Hitsugaya asked, eyeing the large-ish television in the corner of the living room.

"The Eleventh can't just have a load of DVDs and nothing to play them on, now can it?" Matsumoto retorted.

Hitsugaya wondered why he hadn't thought of that. "Whatever. But didn't you say we were watching a film, not a…dee-vee-dee?"

"…A DVD is a film, taicho."

"How many words are there for one thing?" he shouted, exasperated.

There was no answer. Matsumoto had apparently left the room.

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes and sat down on the bright sofa to wait for her return. After about a minute, her head popped round the door that led to to the kitchen.

"Taicho! I need to get the film from Zaraki-taicho, could you make the popcorn for me, please?" she asked politely.

"How do you do it?" he asked, entering the small cooking area.

"It's easy as pie! You just put some oil in the pot, dump a load of these kernels in," she gestured to the popcorn packet on the counter, "whack on the heat, and wait for it to stop popping!"

"Popping? I'm taking it that's why it's called popcorn."

"Yup! But don't be alarmed if it sounds like explosions are happening, taicho! That's what it does!" she informed him before shunpoing out of the door.

Hitsugaya regarded the popcorn equipment for a moment before he started following Matsumoto's instructions.

He poured the oil into the pot and followed it with a handful of kernels. When he peered in though, it looked like a rather small amount for two people, so he added another couple of fistfuls. He turned the stove on, remembering to put the lid on the pan, and sat down to wait for the first mini explosion.

All in all, he thought, there was absolutely nothing that could go wrong this time.

After five minutes, the oil start hissing and bubbling, but no explosion came, causing Hitsugaya to wonder whether these popcorn things worked after all. His mind was reassured when a small pop alerted him to the start of the process. He strolled over to the stove to watch.

As he peered through the steam-covered glass in the pot lid, he saw a blurry mass of golden, with one pure white puff in the middle. At another explosion, a second puff came to join it.

Hitsugaya watched in something akin to awe as the popping continued, increasing in speed and intensity. After another five minutes though, he was slightly worried. The pot seemed to be getting very full, and the pops didn't seem to be slowing.

Grabbing a tea towel to protect his hands from burns, the young captain held the lid of the pot down to prevent the explosions from blowing it clean off. How did such small things get so big, anyway?

Finally, after what seemed like a century of straining his arms to hold down the constantly growing mass of popcorn, the explosions slowed down and subsequently stopped. Hitsugaya hurriedly turned off the heat before any of it could burn and went to fetch a large serving dish to put the snack in. Though it was more like a full meal now.

Picking up the pot to dump the contents, Hitsugaya forgot that the handles would be very hot. Swearing, he dropped the cooking utensil, thankfully sparing himself from more burns, but also sending a huge wave of white, fluffy puffs cascading over the pristine kitchen.

"…Shit." Hitsugaya swore again.

…

"Oh my God." Matsumoto stated when she walked into her kitchen.

Hitsugaya looked up sheepishly. "I think I put a bit too much in." he informed her.

"Yeah. It grows a lot. I should have told you that, probably." she nodded, still trying to comprehend the sheer amount of the stuff her captain had managed to cram into that small pot. "Well, nothing we can do about it now. Come on, let's clear this lot up. It's probably a good thing in the end; I don't need to put on any more weight." she said, producing a black bin bag seemingly out of nowhere and beginning to gather up handfuls of popcorn.

"You are the one person who will never need to worry about their weight, Matsumoto." Hitsugaya muttered, stooping to help her.

"Naw, thanks, taicho!" she said, smiling sweetly.

_Crap. Did I say that out loud?_ Hitsugaya thought. _Oh well._

…

After finally clearing up the popcorn disaster, taicho and fukutaicho sat down to watch the movie Matsumoto had brought from the Eleventh Division.

"What is it?" Hitsugaya asked suspiciously, eyeing the cartoon-like cover of the thing.

"It's a children's movie, but apparently it's really good for all ages! It's called 'The Lion King'." she informed him.

"I see. Have you watched it before?" Toushiro asked her.

"No, but Yachiru told me it was excellent!" Matsumoto said cheerily, slotting the DVD into the machine.

"And of course, that is a completely sane and infallible opinion to take…" Hitsugaya mumbled under his breath.

Rangiku didn't hear him. "Okay taicho! Let's watch!" she exclaimed as the adverts started rolling across the screen.

Matsumoto repeatedly pressed the skip button until the copyright notices for the actual movie came up.

"This is it!" she called excitedly.

"I can see that, Matsumoto." Hitsugaya informed her.

Contrary to his initial conception, 'The Lion King' was not, apparently, a cartoon. And nor did it have anything to do with lions.

Ten minutes in, he concluded that it wasn't a children's film either.

No, definitely not for children. Or young teenagers.

Or adults, really.

Hitsugaya glanced over at Matsumoto, who was turning a rather alarming shade of green.

He swallowed down his own bile before saying, "Matsumoto…maybe you should take it out now."

His lieutenant gladly obliged, pressing the eject button and removing the reflective disc.

"That was most definitely not for children." Hitsugaya unnecessarily informed her.

She shook her head.

"And nor was it a cartoon, as indicated on the cover."

Another shake.

"It wasn't 'The Lion King', was it Matsumoto?"

Matsumoto shook her head one last time.

"What was it, then?" Hitsugaya inquired.

"'The Human Centipede'." Matsumoto said, reading the title printed across the DVD.

"…Kusajishi has a sick sense of humour."

…

"Oh no, Matsumoto! No more DVDs!" Hitsugaya said, scrambling backwards and subsequently falling off the sofa.

"Don't worry, taicho! I told Zaraki-taicho about the…mix-up, and after laughing his head off, he gave us another. This one is what it says on the cover. I checked." Rangiku reassured him, helping him up off the floor.

"Fine." Matsumoto really was set on the idea of a movie night, wasn't she? "What is it, then?"

She held up the case. Ah, good. Not another cartoon. "It's called 'Just Go With It'. See her?" she asked, pointing to the actress on the cover. "She's Jennifer Aniston. She's really famous."

"…And?" Hitsugaya prompted.

"And nothing; just wanted to see if you were interested!"

"And I'm not."

"No. Oh well! Let's watch this thing!" Matsumoto cheered, inserting the disc into the DVD player.

Thankfully, 'Just Go With It' was not horrific, disgusting or gory. In fact, it was exactly what it said on the cover: a romantic comedy. A bit too girly for his tastes, maybe, but Matsumoto seemed to be happy.

Halfway through the film, Matsumoto pressed pause, freezing the screen immediately. Hitsugaya looked at her quizzically.

"Just going to get some blankets. It's a bit chilly." she said, getting up from her place on the floor.

"Okay." Hitsugaya said. Now she mentioned it, it _was _slightly cold. But he guessed he felt it less so than she did; his zanpakuto _was _an ice type, after all.

Shortly, Matsumoto returned with a large bundle of blankets. She spread two out on the floor, and motioned for him to get on one side. She then draped a blanket over his lap before seating herself on her side and wrapping herself in her own blanket.

"Hm, warm…huh, taicho?" she asked, smiling slightly at him before un-freezing the film again.

"Yes. It's very pleasant. Thank you, Matsumoto." Hitsugaya returned the smile with one of his own rare ones, causing hers to widen noticeably.

By the end of the movie, both captain and lieutenant were curled up on the floor together, sound asleep underneath their huge pile of blankets.

**A/N: And there's the fluff! I really hope you lot liked this chapter as much as I do; the romance is finally beginning to creep into this fic! Don't worry, it's not going to rush in all of a sudden. I don't really like that in stories, so I'm gonna try and keep it as slow and believable as possible! And before any of you ask: no, they are not going to be having kids or getting married or anything like that. I just don't do that with my pairings, it seems a bit OOC for me...sorry for anyone who likes that kind of stuff, this is just my opinion!**

**Forgot to put this in the disclaimer: I don't own 'The Lion King', 'The Human Centipede'** **(Ew. Saw the trailer for that, and I nearly threw up.), or 'Just Go With It'. Yeah, I know, the latter wasn't released until 2011, (and 'The Human Centipede wasn't released before 2010 either!) and this is supposed to be set before Ichigo appears, but...can we just imagine that it was made earlier? I couldn't think of anything more perfect to set the scene for this chapter! (Meaning 'Just Go With It', not 'The Human Centipede'!) Thank you for your understanding! :)**

**I have two word prompts that still need to be used, but I am definitely open for more! If you have a particular word that you think will be good, please review or PM me, and if you want to, you could suggest a storyline to go with it, though I may not use it exactly. Thanks again!**

**~tii-chan17**


	6. Cookies

**A/N: Another update! I've just realised my chapters are getting longer than normal; this one's nearly 3,000 words, and usually I write about 1,500 or something. But whatever! I guess it's a good thing, right? Either way, I don't think I'll ever be able to write an 8k epic chapter...I just don't have it in me to proof-read that much...**

**This was another really fun one to write! But it made me hungry...anyway! Thanks to dragonballzlover2499, who requested the word prompt for this chapter. It was brill, congrats!**

**A smaller response than usual to last chapter, but like I said, I'm so used to the absolutely HUGE ones I've been getting for this chapter, a normal one seems slightly disappointing. So I don't mind that much, but remember: I love reviews and they prompt quicker updates! (normally)**

**So, thanks to those who did review, who are:**

**The. Evil. Squirrel (still can't get over the hilarity of that pen name!)**

**metsfan101**

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**bandgirlz**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**and sagitgirlth, who requested the huuuugest amount of words I have ever seen! Thank youuu, that's got me covered for at least the whole of January! (lol)**

**I'm still open for word requests, so if you have an idea, please tell me in a review or a PM! And I think I should stop nattering now.**

** Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to the awesome (got back into the habit of using that word) Kubo Tite! Who seriously needs to update his manga. So I can see what's become of Yukio. I swear...if he doesn't come back, I will...don't even get me started.  
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Cookies

He felt so warm.

Normally for him, that wasn't exactly a good thing, but this time…it was perfect. The soothing, soft warmth seeped into his senses, flooding them with serenity. It smelled warm, too. A husky, spicy scent that was exciting yet relaxing at the same time. Almost like…

Hitsugaya's eyes snapped open. His sight was filled with golden strands of sunlight, covering his vision.

_What? Am I still dreaming?_ Hitsugaya thought as he slowly dragged his mind out of the deep pit of slumber.

Half awake, he realised that no, the shining threads were actually there. He brushed them away with a sluggish hand, trying to rid his face of the slight tickle. Then he froze.

"Wha—What…" Hitsugaya struggled, his mind working furiously to try and explain the phenomenon in front of his eyes.

What the hell was he doing cuddled up to Matsumoto? On the _floor_, no less. They had blankets, so it couldn't have been a spur-of-the-moment—

Ah. The 'movie night'. They must have gone to sleep while watching…whatever it was they had been watching.

Hitsugaya glanced behind him, his thoughts confirmed when he saw the TV was still on, though the film had long since finished. Reaching carefully over Matsumoto's sleeping body, he grasped the remote control and pressed the 'off' button.

Now that was taken care of, all he had to do now was remove himself from this compromising position before Matsumoto woke—

Rangiku cracked her eyes open. "Taicho?"

…up.

Rangiku sat up hurriedly, dislodging her captain from his previous place lying across her torso. "Taicho! What—why are we—"

"We fell asleep watching that 'movie', Matsumoto." Hitsugaya informed her, picking himself up off the floor.

"Oh yeah. Phew…I thought for a second there something'd happened!" Matsumoto wiped her brow with dramatic relief.

Hitsugaya levelled a glare at her, his mussed hair falling over his eyes slightly. "As if I'd—"

"Oh my _God_! Taicho! I just realised how _cute _you look half asleep!" Matsumoto squealed, enveloping him in a Hug of Doom and planting his face firmly between her oversized breasts.

"Gah! Matsumoto! Can't…breathe…!" the poor captain gasped, struggling to no avail to escape her grasp.

Matsumoto paid no heed to his efforts, rocking him back and forth, all the while chanting, "So cute, so cute, so cute, so cute~!"

"_Matsumoto!_"

She hurriedly released him. "Ah…sorry, taicho. Heat of the moment, you know?"

Her captain scowled at her, trying to fix his severe bed head. "That was highly inappropriate, Matsumoto. Never do it again." he ordered.

"Uh…taicho? Isn't waking up in the same…" she glanced around at the messy pile of blankets surrounding them, "…sleeping quarters highly inappropriate?"

"…Shut up Matsumoto."

"Yes, taicho. But here, let me help you with that," She leaned towards him suddenly, combing her fingers through his snowy white hair to try and rectify it. She then straightened out his slipped shihakusho, re-covering the pale skin that had been revealed. She then fixed her own hair and glanced down at the neck of her kosode. It was gaping quite a lot, revealing even more of her cleavage than normal.

She poked it curiously, much to Hitsugaya's embarrassment, and then shrugged, leaving her clothes as they were.

"Come on, taicho! We're going to be late for work otherwise!" she reminded him cheerfully, smiling chirpily at him.

"Crap! Work! We overslept!" Hitsugaya stated unnecessarily, jumping to his feet and grabbing Hyorinmaru, who was leaning against the door post. He then shunpoed out the door.

Matsumoto raised an eyebrow. He was ever so slightly eager, wasn't he? Sighing, she shook her head and followed him at a decidedly slower pace. She'd never been able to understand her captain's enthusiasm for work.

…

The large majority of the Tenth Division smirked amusedly as their taicho and fukutaicho stepped into the barracks, over two hours late. Taking in their dishevelled appearances, and the fact they were entering together, most of them decided the notorious rumour mill of Seireitei was going to receive a lot of new things to mull over very soon.

"Back to work!" Hitsugaya barked, his cheeks flushing a pretty pink. He wasn't naïve enough to wonder at what they thought the reason for their being so late was.

Scoffing in mild disgust, the Tenth Division captain wondered how the shinigami could be so…eager to think that taicho and fukutaicho relationships were going on all around Seireitei? Granted, there were _some_, but it was hardly a common occurrence, as the soutaicho didn't really approve of it.

He understood that many of the men were attracted to Matsumoto due to her…extensive assets, but seriously! How could they even suspect he thought of her in the same way? Yes, he knew she was attractive, even beautiful maybe, but he just didn't have time for such things.

He also knew that his and Matsumoto's current living arrangements were the subject of a lot of speculation, but to be frank, he didn't really care. Let the morons think what they want to think; that wasn't a problem as long as they didn't approach him about it.

Hitsugaya sighed lightly as he sat down at his desk. He looked over at Matsumoto, who, for once, was actually doing some paperwork, then back at his own pile of documents. He took the first sheet off the top and began to blindly sign the spaces that needed it.

While he worked, Hitsugaya thought. He knew for a fact the rumour mill could be incredibly vicious, and he had already heard some rather nasty tales about Matsumoto. This…misunderstanding would probably add some more. Of course, he didn't believe any of the stories; they were no doubt made up by some sadistic shinigami with nothing better to do, such as the ones who had kidnapped him a few days previously. He also knew that these stories hurt his lieutenant much more than she let show, and that troubled him. No one should be subjected to those kinds of rumours; it just wasn't right. Those shinigami were only jealous. Jealous of her character, her beauty, her popularity, her—wait, why was he even thinking about that?

Hitsugaya shook his head dismissively. He was obviously still sleepy from his rather late lie-in. To be frank, that was the best night's sleep he'd gotten in a long time, and not just because he'd managed to sleep later than normal.

No, Matsumoto had a very soothing presence, despite her flamboyant personality. It relaxed him, made him drop his guard slightly around her. He liked the sensation of her reiatsu mingling with his. He supposed it was just because he trusted her and, despite all the odds, she was a good lieutenant, although slightly too fond of skiving off work to go drinking.

Hitsugaya allowed himself a small smile as he remembered all the ridiculous predicaments his fukutaicho had gotten into over the years. Yes, they had a deep connection. Not quite friends, but…comrades. They understood each other.

"Taicho?" Matsumoto's voice snapped him out of his reverie.

"Yes Matsumoto? What is it?" he inquired softly, still in a rather soporific state of mind.

"Ukitake-taicho's at the door, sir. He says he'd like to talk to you." Matsumoto told him formally, as was normal when there were other captains around.

Crap. That could only mean one thing. "Show him in, Matsumoto." he sighed, preparing himself mentally.

Matsumoto opened the door and ushered the white-haired captain through. He wasted no time in coming up to his desk and planting himself right in Hitsugaya's line of sight. Matsumoto stood hovering in the background, slightly amused. She knew what Ukitake's visit meant too.

"Ah, Hitsugaya-kun! I was just thinking: I haven't spoken to you in a while. I had some free time on my hands, so I came to have a chat! I trust it's not too much of an intrusion?" the kindly captain asked, smiling gently.

"No, it's fine. What did you want to talk about?" Hitsugaya sighed again.

"Anything, really. How's the rebuilding of your house going?" Matsumoto started guiltily and hurriedly went back to her paperwork when she heard that one.

"Very slowly. I can't think what's taking them so long. I don't even think they've managed to put up the skeleton yet." Hitsugaya informed him irritably, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"Oh, that's a shame. But I have something to cheer you up!" Ukitake exclaimed, reaching into his sleeve.

_Here it comes,_ Hitsugaya thought.

Ukitake produced a medium-sized box of cookies and placed it on the younger captain's desk. Hitsugaya looked at them without emotion. Why was it Ukitake felt the need to shower him with sweets again? He wasn't a kid, damn it!

"I hope you enjoy them, Hitsugaya-kun. Now, I really should be getting back to my division before my third seats destroy something." Ukitake sighed, concealing his hands in his now-empty sleeves. "Have a good day, Hitsugaya-kun!" he called, exiting the room.

"You too." Hitsugaya said monotonously, not bothering to turn round so the other captain could hear him better.

Matsumoto giggled lightly and walked over to his desk to examine the cookies. "Not bad, eh, taicho? They're chocolate chip." she observed, licking her lips.

"You take them. I don't like sweets." Hitsugaya said, shoving the box towards her.

"Huh? Are you sure, taicho? How can anyone refuse a box of chocolate chip cookies?"

"I'm sure, Matsumoto. Now, go take them and finish your work. We started late today." Hitsugaya reminded her.

Matsumoto hesitantly picked up the box. "Okay, taicho, but you can always ask for one if you want!" she said, walking back over to her own desk.

"I won't, don't worry." Hitsugaya informed her sardonically, rolling his eyes.

"Whatever you say," she called, opening the box and taking out a cookie. She contemplated it carefully before taking a bite. "Mm, these are delicious, taicho! You sure you don't want one?"

"Perfectly sure, Matsumoto."

She shrugged. "Your loss."

The two worked in a comfortable silence for the next hour, the only sound in the room being the scratching of two pens on paper and Matsumoto's munching.

Eventually, Matsumoto held up the last cookie. "Taicho, please try at least one. I'm sure you'd love it!"

"For the last time, no, Matsumoto! I don't care for sweets!" he said yet again, his hand clenching around his pen in irritation.

"No, I mean it, taicho. Ukitake-taicho gave these to you; it'd be rude not to at least try one." she said, rising from her chair and sauntering over to his desk, rounding it and crouching down at the side of his own chair.

"So what? What are you going to do?" Hitsugaya goaded her, smirking slightly. "Force feed me?"

"Maybe." Matsumoto shrugged. "Just one bite, taicho, that's all I'm asking. Do you want me to go first?"

"I've already witnessed you chomping your way through a whole box of those cookies, Matsumoto."

"Whatever." She lifted the cookie slowly to her mouth, parting her lips and taking a small bite, never breaking eye-contact with her taicho. "See? Nothing to dislike about a cookie!"

"They're too sweet, Matsumoto! Now go back to your own desk and—" Hitsugaya broke off as Matsumoto shoved the cookie in his mouth whole, covering his lips with her hand to prevent him from spitting it out.

"Come now, taicho. It doesn't taste that bad, now does it?" she asked. Her answer took the form of a furious glare. "Okay, just chew and swallow!" she commanded cheerfully, ignoring the malevolent scowl.

Hitsugaya reluctantly started moving his jaw up and down. Matsumoto still hadn't removed her hand from his mouth, and he could feel the soft texture of her palm grazing his lips.

Fighting down the unexplained blush from her touch, Hitsugaya sped up his mastication and swallowed thickly. "There," he said, pulling away from her hand and opening his mouth so she could see there was nothing left. "Happy now?"

"Ecstatic, taicho. Now, you liked it, didn't you?" Matsumoto grinned, lowering her hand to place it in her lap.

"…It wasn't terrible." Hitsugaya admitted, averting his gaze.

Matsumoto punched the air victoriously. "Yes! Taicho likes cookies!" she shouted triumphantly. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go and tell the others. Over a couple of drinks, of course…" she said, shunpoing out of the door before he could stop her.

"Matsumoto!" he yelled after her furiously. No answer came except a loud laugh. Hitsugaya groaned and slumped in his chair. Great, distracted by a cookie. That'd really help his reputation.

**A/N: Hah! Lol...Matsumoto's so inventive with her ways to skive off work!**

**Is it just me, or is the images of a Shiro-chan with a cookie hanging out of his mouth just too cute for words? I think it's just me...but then again, he looks cute all the time anyway! XD**

**Oh, and a small question: I know this fic is labelled humour, but should I do some angsty chapters? I'm not very good at angst, but I can always try, and sometimes it can be really powerful in a story! I might have to get tutoring though...I'm not very talented at depressing stuff. Usually, I write something really sad, then put a stupid sentence at the end of it that just ruins the entire atmosphere! ****So like me...**

**Oh yeah, another thing! Recently, I discovered the manga Kuroshitsuji, or Black Butler. Who else is addicted? Seriously, Sebastian's so hot! Drool...although that may just be me again.**


	7. Shopping

**A/N: Woahhh, such a huuuge response to last chapter! Biggest yet, I believe! Makes me so happy...-w-**

**So, as you can see, I have decided to reward ya'll with a really quick update. LESS THAN 24 HOURS BABY! WOOT! Hope ya'll like it! Even though I kinda don't...well, I do, but it's not my favourite. On the subject, I think my favourite chapter so far is DVD. That was really fun. Yachiru and her...interesting film choices, LOL!**

**Credit for this word request goes to TheSecondQuincy, who I really have to thank, as it's opened up a whole storyline from this one chapter that will probably last for two more...but maybe I'll cut it short after the next. Depends how lazy I'm feeling! :)**

**So, like I said, massive response to the last chapter, and I got a few votes on the 'angst or no angst, that is the question' subject, and so far, the vast majority have said NO. So, there probably won't be any angst, but there almost definitely WILL be a saddish chapter, as this fic can't all be sunshine, lollipops and rainbows...*starts singing the song from the Butlins advert. Those of you who don't live in England are probably confused right now. Just search 'Sunshine, lollipops and rainbows Butlins advert' into Youtube, and it'll probably come up. But then again, you probably don't care...***

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**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite, King of Bleachworld!  
><strong>

Shopping

"I trust you are willing to go on this mission, Hitsugaya-taicho?"

"Of course, Yamamoto-soutaicho. But…the subject is not really in my expertise. Could I take a work partner?"

"Naturally. But make sure they won't limit your research capabilities."

"I understand."

"You may take your leave now, Hitsugaya-taicho."

…

Hitsugaya sighed heavily as he pushed his hair back from his forehead. That captain's meeting had been intense, to say the least! Yamamoto-soutaicho had assigned him a new mission which was, in his opinion, absolutely pointless. There was no reason to—

"Taicho! You're back early!" Matsumoto cheered as she glomped him from behind.

Hitsugaya cried out in protest as they both fell to the floor. The noise was soon smothered by Matsumoto's huge breasts, though.

"So, taicho! What's up? Usually you only come back early when you've been told to go on a mission or something. Are you going on a mission?" Matsumoto quick-fired, removing her captain's head from her cleavage when she realised he couldn't answer.

Hitsugaya gasped for breath before fixing her with a cold glare. "Yes, Matsumoto. I've been ordered to make a trip to the Living World as soon as possible." he informed her, wriggling out from under her body and standing up.

"Hm? What are you doing here then? Do you need special equipment?" Matsumoto asked, also picking herself up from the floor.

"No, it's a research mission. I'm here to fetch our Third Seat. He's coming with me."

Matsumoto raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Really? Did Yamamoto-san order you to take him?"

"No. He's my only choice." Hitsugaya said monotonously.

"Huh? Taicho, you do know I'm free for the next couple of days, right?"

"No, Matsumoto, you aren't free. You have paperwork. And either way, Yamamoto clearly said to take someone who won't distract me from my research."

"But I wouldn't—" Matsumoto broke off at the pointed look her captain was giving her.

"I'm going to go find the Third Se—wagh!" Hitsugaya exclaimed as Matsumoto rugby-tackled him to the floor. Again. "Matsumoto! What do you think you're doing?"

"Take me, taicho! Please please please! I wouldn't distract you at all, and I'd work, and I'd write the reports, and I'd—"

"Shut up, Matsumoto!" her captain commanded.

Matsumoto obeyed.

"I happen to know for a fact that you will distract me, whether you aim to or not, and—"

Matsumoto interrupted yet again. "How would I distract you if I wasn't even trying, taicho?" she asked innocently.

Hitsugaya blushed a deep crimson. "That's beside the point. The point is, I can't take you because you'd get so side-tracked by the clothes that—"

Another interruption. "What clothes, taicho?"

"Matsumoto, stop butting in!"

"But what clothes?" Matsumoto didn't fall for his attempt at avoiding the question.

Hitsugaya sighed and closed his eyes briefly. Matsumoto took the chance to coo silently at his cute face. He opened them, and she stopped immediately.

"Apparently, Seireitei is sick of having to buy gigais from Urahara Kisuke. Therefore, the Twelfth Division has been asked to create their own style of gigai, and I have been assigned the task of buying human clothes for them to wear." he informed her, bracing himself for the inevitable onslaught that was coming.

He wasn't disappointed.

"Taicho! Please take me! I know way more about clothes and fashion and stuff than Third Seat-san, and anyway, Kisuke-san likes me better than him, so we'd more likely be allowed to stay at his place, and I'd be really professional and I wouldn't distract you at all, taicho, please please let me come!" she begged, squeezing him very hard in a Hug of Doom.

"Gah! Matsumoto, let go!"

"No! I won't let go until you let me come!" she said, only holding him tighter when he struggled violently against her grip.

"Matsumoto!"

"…Am I interrupting something?" came a slightly amused voice from the doorway.

Both captain and Lieutenant sprang apart from each other, Hitsugaya's face flushing until it positively glowed.

The Tenth Division Third Seat stood behind them, a slight smirk on his face at the sight of such a…compromising position. He was going to have fun telling the rest of Seireitei about the newfound 'relationship' between his superior officers.

"It's not what it looks like!" Matsumoto only stoked the fire when she let fly with the most obvious, cliché 'lie' the three worlds had ever seen.

"…Sure." her subordinate didn't look fooled.

"Wipe that smirk off your face. Nothing happened, Matsumoto was just being overly persuasive, that's all." Hitsugaya's face heated up even more when he realised the innuendo that he'd just presented.

The officer's smirk only grew wider. "Yes sir."

"Ah, and I was wondering if you could—mmph!" Hitsugaya's voice was muffled when Matsumoto slapped a hand over his mouth.

"…Yes, taicho?" the Third Seat asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nothing to worry about! Me and taicho are going on a mission in the Living World for a couple of days is all!" Matsumoto explained, ignoring the panicked/furious look her taicho sent her way. "Well, we should be off! The Senkaimon's gonna be opening soon! Have a nice day, Third Seat-san!" she bade him farewell before exiting the room hurriedly.

The now very much alone officer stood in the office, staring at the door through which his captain and lieutenant had escaped.

"I doubt they even know my name…" he muttered, shaking his head and starting on the paperwork. This was going to keep him busy for a while.

…

"Ah, good morning Hitsugaya-kun, Matsumoto-san." Ukitake smiled at them as the two approached, the former still shouting at his subordinate for the blatant lie she'd told their Third Seat. Not to mention the ridiculous amount of manipulation and deviousness. Obviously Ichimaru had rubbed off on her more than he'd previously thought.

Ukitake chuckled ruefully when his greeting was mostly ignored, and proceed to open the Senkaimon for the two to pass through. He provided them both with a Hell Butterfly and a few words of farewell and advice.

"Remember, Hitsugaya-kun; blue and green should not be seen. Matsumoto-san, no impractical items of clothing."

Hitsugaya looked peeved at the stupid tip he'd been given and grabbed hold of Matsumoto's arm, proceeding to drag her towards the entrance of the Senkaimon.

"Bye, Ukitake-taicho!" his Lieutenant called, receiving a cheerful wave in reply.

The two shunpoed off on their journey to the Living World.

…

"Taicho, where are we?" Matsumoto asked when they emerged in a green forest somewhere off the side of Karakura Town.

"How should I know? But I can sense some reiatsu from that direction; it's probably Urahara. If we follow it, we should get to civilisation and our gigais soon enough." he reasoned.

Matsumoto nodded distractedly and followed her taicho through the various bushes and trees.

It took around fifteen minutes for the two to escape the canopy without using shunpo. When they finally emerged, Hitsugaya took the chance to pick out all the leaves and twigs that had accumulated in his hair. Noticing a single leaf in his fukutaicho's hair, he reached up and gently removed it.

Matsumoto looked down at him in surprise, then smiled softly at him when she saw the offending plant. "Thanks, taicho."

"No problem." he replied curtly, dropping the leaf and continuing on his search for the blond shopkeeper.

…

"Ah, Hitsugaya-kun and Rangiku-san! How may I help you?" Urahara asked cheerfully when the two finally found him.

Hitsugaya looked at him levelly. "We need gigais."

"Please!" Matsumoto added, earning a grin from the shopkeeper and a scowl from her captain.

"No problem! You'll have to wait about an hour though."

"That isn't an issue. I can wait to go on this ridiculous mission." Hitsugaya sighed, rolling his eyes yet again at the mere idea of the activity he'd be subjected to over the next few days.

"That bad, huh?" Kisuke inquired sympathetically.

"You have no idea…"

…

"Excuse me," Hitsugaya alerted the attention of the assistant behind the counter of the hotel they were going to be staying at. He'd promptly refused Urahara's offer of accommodation when he saw the two kids that worked there fighting over what looked like a broken mop.

"How may I help you?" the pretty assistant asked cheerily, smiling at him fondly over the counter.

"I'd like to book two rooms."

"Ah, I'm sorry. All people who book rooms have to be at least eighteen. How about you let your mommy do that bit, huh?" she said, unknowingly stepping very close to a slow and painful death.

Just then, Matsumoto entered the building. Seeing her captain looking very, _very _angry, she hurried over to the desk and interrupted the conversation. "Hello! Sorry about that. I'd like to book two rooms, please." she said, returning the smile of the assistant.

"I'm sorry, madam, but we only have one room free. It has two single beds, though."

Matsumoto debated for a second. This _was_ the only hotel in town. "Okay, that's fine! We'll take it!" she confirmed, signing the appropriate documents when required.

Hitsugaya stood to the side, looking annoyed. Oh, how he hated been treated like a child. Damn this gigai, making him look much younger than he did normally! (It didn't.)

"All right! I've booked the room! Let's go dump out stuff, tai—" A glare, reminding her about the subject they'd discussed only minutes before. "…Tou…shirou…"

Hitsugaya acknowledge her with a cold nod and allowed her to lead him to the door with the number that matched the one on their key.

Matsumoto opened it and peeked in. "Wow, taicho. It's…kinda small." she said, wrinkling up her nose.

Hitsugaya walked in and looked around. She was right, it _was_ small. The two beds were almost right next to each other, with barely any space between them. He poked his head round the door to the bathroom and noted the tiny shower, sink and toilet. It looked as if they were going to be living quite simply for the duration of their trip.

He walked back to where Matsumoto was bouncing on her bed, trying to get the springs to be less 'poky'.

"Matsumoto. We should go do some clothes shopping. I don't want to spend any more time here than necessary." he stated.

Matsumoto looked at him, injured. "Hey! You gave me a Death Glare for forgetting to call you by your first name, and now you're calling me 'Matsumoto'! That's not fair; I'm supposed to be your mom!"

"You are _not_! I apologise for my slip-up earlier, but I refuse to call you anything other than your name. Come on, we need to go…Rangiku." he blushed slightly, turning his face away so she couldn't see.

Matsumoto jumped off the bed. "That's better! I know this really good shop for cheap clothes that are still really nice. It's just over the road and round a couple of corners…"

…

"Tai—Toushiro! Isn't this top so cute?" Matsumoto squealed, not bothering to wait for an answer before chucking it in her basket.

Hitsugaya rubbed his temples and picked up a plain shirt. "Rangiku, there's really no need to—"

"Oh, look, they're having a sale on shoes! Let's go see, Toushiro!" she said excitedly, dragging him off by the hand.

"Matsu—uh…Rangiku!" came the protest.

…

Hitsugaya flopped down onto his designated bed, absolutely exhausted. Who knew traipsing around a couple of stores and picking out items of clothing could be so tiring? Matsumoto had attempted to make him try on some stuff too, but he'd point-blank refused. It hadn't stopped her though, and they'd spent ages in some random boutique while she modelled clothes that were way over their budget. So much for not distracting him from his work, huh?

"Tai—I mean, Toushiro! Come on over, I bought something for you!" Matsumoto called him from her own bed, beckoning to him to go sit next to her.

Hitsugaya groaned softly and sat up, crawling his way over the tiny gap to Matsumoto's bed and poking his head over her shoulder. "M—Rangiku, I told you that we didn't need to buy anything other than clothes!"

"It is clothes, Toushiro! It's just, that jumper you're wearing looks really itchy, and I noticed you were scratching at the neckline earlier today." Matsumoto told him, pulling his jumper down slightly to reveal the red welts his nails had left to prove her point.

Hitsugaya blushed and slapped her hand away. She was right, it _was_ itchy, but there was no need for her to—

"Look, isn't it cute!" Matumoto said, holding up a plain white long-sleeved T-shirt with a cartoon watermelon slice on the front. "I remember you saying watermelon was your favourite food, and when I saw this, I just thought it'd be perfect on you!" she exclaimed, holding it up against his torso. "I hope I got your size right…" she added, looking slightly worried.

"I'm sure it's fine, Matsu—Rangiku. Thank you for your consideration."

"Oh, you don't have to be so formal! We're not at work right now, you can just be yourself! But then, maybe that is yourself…" she trailed off at his frown. "So!" she changed the subject, "Are you going to try it on?"

"Uh…"

"Oh, please, Toushiro! You'd look so cu—uh…it'd make the itching stop!" she corrected herself hurriedly, remembering her captain's aversion to the word 'cute'.

Hitsugaya sighed in resignation. "Fine…" he said, taking the T-shirt from her hands. He pulled the damned jumper over his head, and dropped it on the floor. He'd averted his eyes from Matsumoto's, which was a good thing, as if he'd been looking at her, he would have clocked her over the head for such blatant staring.

He slipped on the T-shirt, feeling with relief the soft, smooth texture of the light material. "Yes, that's much better. Thank you, Matsumoto. I feel much more comfortable." he graced her with one of his rare smiles, his eyes softened to the point where it made her heart race.

"No—no problem, taicho." she gulped, looking down at her lap and fighting down the blush that threatened to make its way to her cheeks.

Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"

"I mean, T-Toushiro." she stuttered slightly.

Hitsugaya smirked at his successful attempt to make his fukutaicho feel awkward. He quickly made his way to his own bed and produced the book he'd taken with him to keep him occupied. "That's better, Matsumoto. We'll go shopping again tomorrow." he told her, not removing his eyes from the words on the page. Subsequently, he missed the fond smile his Lieutenant sent his way.

"Yes, Toushiro."

**A/N: Naww~~~**

**I just can't seem to stop writing really cute images of Shiro-chan! Watermelon T-shirt, cuuuttte! Not to mention no shirt at all! Ehehehe...**

**I wonder why Rangiku's starting to feel a little awkward round her captain, huh? Could it be-yeah, I'll shut up with the dramatic nonsense now.** **Take it how you will!**

**Also, I think Yamamoto sent Toushiro on this 'stupid' mission for a reason! I.e.: he knew Rangiku would** **force Toushiro to take her, and he's a very devious, bored matchmaker! Even if he doesn't exactly approve of captain/vice-captain relationships...**

**I don't know why I'm starting so many new paragraphs in this A/N. Maybe I have a paragraph addiction? Yeah, I really should shut up now.**

**As always, reviews are very much appreciated! Please tell me if you have a word request or a chapter plotline suggestion. And does anyone else have Rihanna's 'Don't Stop The Music' stuck in their head? 'Cos it just won't get out of mine! I'd better go listen to it to shut it up...-_-**


	8. Cuddle

**A/N: Hey everyone, Happy New Year! I hope it brings you luck, good fortune and cookies! I go back to school on Wednes day, so I decided to give y'all this to satisfy you while I'm busy. There may not be an update for quite some time, depending on how much homework I get. Sorry! But I'm sure you all understand that sometimes life gets in the way of fun. Thanks for your understanding! (In advance)**

**Credit for this word request goes to sagitgirlth, who also requested the words for the next...million chapters? Hah, not quite that much, but still quite a few! Thanks so much to you! xx  
><strong>

**Woah~~record broken last chapter. HUGEST RESPONSE I HAVE EVER HAD FOR ANYTHING, PEOPLES! Seriously, check this out!**

**People who reviewed/favourited/alerted/whatever:**

**dragonballzlover2499**

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**sagitgirlth**

**crumblybiscuit**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon (Still loling about that pen name!)**

**Winter Lover in the Snow**

**The. Evil. Squirrel (...and that one!)**

**and ShiroyukiHime! Geeeeeeeezzzz...can we match it for this chapter? Pwease? *killer puppy dawg eyes***

**Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. But then, you guys probably knew that already, seeing as I am neither rich nor a good artist. Bummer, huh? Life has a habit of doing that to me...  
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Cuddle

"Matsumoto. I mean, Rangiku."

Silence.

"Rangiku."

More silence.

"Matsumoto Rangiku, wake the hell up already!" Hitsugaya yelled into his fukutaicho's ear, resulting in a rather painful headbutt to the lip. "Ow!" he protested, slapping a hand to his abused mouth.

"What about me, taich—Toushiro? You scare the hell out of me, then attack me with your _teeth_, no less! You bit my head!" Rangiku countered.

Toushiro glared at her from his position on the floor, blood slowly seeping between his fingers.

"Taicho?" Rangiku forgot the Real World 'formalities' in her panic. "Are you okay?"

"No, I'm not freaking okay, Matsumoto." He forgot the first-name agreement too. "You slammed your thick skull into my face. How 'okay' do you _think_ I am?"

"Oh…sorry. I'm just not very good at being woken up in the mornings." Matsumoto admitted, crouching down on the floor in front of her captain, who still had his hand clamped to his bottom lip. "Now, come on, taicho. Let me see." she said, gently prying it from his face. She winced at the copious amount of blood.

_Whoops,_ she thought.

**No shit.** Haineko replied.

_Shut up._

"Um…sorry, taicho. Let's get you cleaned up before any of it gets on your nice shirt!" she said, referring to his new watermelon motif.

"It's fine, Matsumoto. I can do it myself." he waved her off, dabbing at the cut with his bare hand, making even more of a mess than had originally appeared.

"I could've sworn you just said you _weren't_ okay, taicho. Even you can't be that contradictory."

"Who're you calling contradictory?" He shot her another scowl.

"…The point still stands!"

Sighing lightly, Hitsugaya allowed Matsumoto to mop up his chin with a tissue she'd produced out of what seemed to be thin air. When her hand repositioned itself to his mouth, however, he pushed it away and grabbed the tissue himself.

"I can do it now, Matsumoto." he informed her, dabbing at his lip to prove the point.

Matsumoto looked at his rather failed attempt, not impressed. "You don't even know where the blood _is_, taicho. If we don't clean it up soon, it'll dry and you'll look like you've just stepped out of a horror movie!"

"I do believe I just said I was fine, Matsumoto. You are in no position to contradict me. However contradictory you may be." he said smugly, calling up her 'insult' of a moment ago.

"That's just not fair." she pouted.

She watched Hitsugaya attempt to mop up his own face, succeeding in only spreading the gore around more.

"Taicho, seriously. Even you have to realise that's never going to work."

"Well, I'll just go to the mirror, then." he theorised, standing up.

"Ha! That mirror's so dirty you wouldn't be able to see your face in it even if you were nose to nose with your reflection!" Matsumoto snorted, remembering her difficult make up session the day before.

"…True." Hitsugaya admitted, sitting back down. "Well? Get on with it, then." he half-commanded, handing her the spotted-red tissue.

"Really?" Rangiku was surprised her captain had caved so early. He was notorious for being butt-headed, after all… "Okay then!" …but then she was never one to pass up an opportunity to embarrass her adorable taicho.

Rangiku binned the soiled tissue and produced a new one, which she wetted with a small amount of saliva.

"Hey! No spit! That's disgusting!" Hitsugaya protested, leaning backwards.

"Well, what am I supposed to do? The blood's dried." she pointed out.

"Get some _water._ From the _tap_." Hitsugaya suggested with searing sarcasm, rolling his eyes _way_ more than necessary.

"That's just a waste of the world's natural resources! Do you know how small the percentage of drinkable water is on Earth, taicho? Do you understand how important-"

"Okay, okay! Dear God, Matsumoto. I never knew you were a tree-hugger, of all people." Toushiro muttered, re-presenting his face to her hand.

"I can be anything when it's useful!" she informed him, grabbing the back of his neck in case he decided to pull away after all.

Toushiro flinched slightly when the damp object came into contact with his mouth. It didn't hurt, per se, but this was _Matsumoto's_ spit on his _lip_! Oh, wouldn't they all laugh in Seireitei if this ever got out.

Rangiku continued to dab, taking longer than was strictly necessary, and shifting her other hand from the back of his neck to his chin, making him blush lightly. Ah, he was so fun to tease…

Eventually, all the blood was gone from the small captain's face, and Matsumoto released him. Shame; she had only managed to make him blush a pale pink. It really was adorably sweet when he went as bright as a tomato.

"All gone, Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya inquired sarcastically, raising an eyebrow when Rangiku snapped out of her reverie with a small flinch.

"Hm? Ah…yeah! All gone, taicho!" she affirmed, giving him a mock salute.

"Okay, then. Thanks, I guess." he said, picking himself up yet again and offering his vice-captain a hand. "We should hit the shops. I don't want to get caught in rush hour."

"Rush _hour_, taicho? It's more like rush _afternoon_!" she corrected, remembering with horror the huge amount of crowds they'd discovered on their first shopping trip in the Living World.

"Whatever. I still don't want to get caught in it." Toushiro chucked her a pair of jeans and a blouse. "Get dressed; we'll go out as soon as you're ready." he said as he went to the bathroom, presumably to give her some privacy.

"Okay, taicho! Oh my God! Just realised; we completely forgot about the whole first name thing!" She sighed. "It just feels completely unnatural." she complained, hoicking up the jeans.

"Don't worry; it's only for the remainder of this trip. Rangiku." came Toushiro's voice. Even when he was out of sight, she could still hear the smirk in his tone.

"Yeah, I know. But I really want to see the faces of the public if I start calling you 'taicho' by mistake…"

"You will do no such thing. We're supposed to fit in, not stick out like a sore thumb." And now she could hear him rolling his eyes.

…

"How about this, Toushiro?" Matsumoto held up another pair of trousers, these ones a dark navy.

"Yeah, they'll be fine." Hitsugaya took them from her and dumped them in the cart. "We should probably get shoes as well."

"Shoes!" Matsumoto enthused, clapping her hands together like a child high on E-numbers.

"Where are they, anyway?" Hitsugaya inspected the large supermarket they were in. They weren't exactly looking for quality, just cheap clothes.

"I think I see them over there!" Again, Matsumoto's shoe radar saved a lot of effort.

"Right. Now, remember, Matsumoto: we're here to get practical items of clothing. Not ridiculous high heels that'll break your ankles if you so much as look at them." he reminded her.

Matsumoto pouted. "Aw. You're no fun, Toushiro."

He ignored her and went to inspect the shoes.

_It's a shame we can't buy in bulk,_ he thought musingly. _It would make everything so much easier. Unfortunately, humans don't seem to think buying fifty pairs of the same sneakers is normal._

He glanced over at Matsumoto, who, despite the warning, was cooing over various pairs of stilettos. He rolled his eyes for about the tenth time that day.

"No." he said without turning round, already knowing Matsumoto was holding up a pair of shoes that had taken her fancy. "Flat heels, Matsumoto. _Comfortable_ and _practical._"

She huffed audibly. "All right…" she threw the shoes back at the display. "Come on, taicho, we have enough for one day. We just need to come back tomorrow, and we'll probably have enough stuff to last a few months. Barely anyone needs a gigai these days."

Hitsugaya dropped a last pair of trainers into their basket. "You're right," he said, pushing the contraption towards the checkout, "but what are we going to do for the rest of the afternoon? I want to avoid that hotel room at all costs."

"We could go get an ice cream. Have you tried ice cream, tai—Toushiro?" she corrected herself at the last moment.

"No. What's it like?" he asked, fairly uninterested.

"It's really sweet and cold and mushy. It tastes like heaven…" Matsumoto started drooling, to Hitsugaya's irritation.

"Okay. We'll go get one of those things after you've paid for this stuff." he said, pushing her in front of the basket.

"Huh? Why do I have to do the buying bit?" she said, confused.

"It'll look weird if I have a credit card. I'm…vertically challenged, remember?" He neatly avoided the word 'short'.

"Oh yeah…" Matsumoto said, joining the end of a rather long line of people. "This looks like it's gonna take a while. Can't you guard it for me while I go see if I can find myself a new top?" she pleaded, fixing him with her famous puppy eyes.

"No."

…

Hitsugaya and Matsumoto pored over the ice cream parlour's menu, each secretly picking out their preferred flavour.

"What are you getting, Toushiro?" Matsumoto asked slyly, cutting him a sideways glance.

"See if you can guess, Rangiku." he replied, meeting her gaze with a smirk.

"…Damn." Foiled. "Uh…vanilla?" She guessed the obvious.

"No."

"Strawberry?"

"No again."

"Chocolate?"

"Nope."

She considered for a second. It was time to take out the big guns. "Double honeycomb caramel cream?"

"Nuh-uh. Sounds too sweet." he grimaced.

Oh yeah… "Yoghurt and cherry?"

"Negative."

There was no way in hell she was giving up. "Pecan?"

"Yet again, Rangiku. No."

Oh, to hell with it all! "Gimme a clue, Toushiro, please?" she begged, pouting profusely.

"It's really, really obvious."

Obvious? How in the name of hell could it be that—

…Oh.

"Watermelon." It wasn't a question.

"Congratulations, Rangiku." Toushiro was obviously having a hard time not cracking a grin.

Rangiku sighed. "That was unfair. Now you guess mine!" she challenged.

Hitsugaya studied the menu. They didn't have persimmon, did they? "Rum and raisin?"

"…Damn you."

"Now, that's not polite, is it?" he teased her. "Let's go order."

They told the assistant what they wanted and moments later received their sticky frozen treats.

"Looks good, huh, Toushiro?" Rangiku aksed, already taking a good lick from her cone.

"I guess." he agreed in his own little way.

"Come on, take a lick! I'm sure it's delicious!" she encouraged him, smiling supportively.

Hitsugaya eyed her suspiciously as he poked out the tip of his tongue his tongue and gave the dessert a small lick.

"Well, what do you think? It's incredible, isn't it?"

"…" Hitsugaya didn't answer, but he took another, larger lick.

"Told you." she teased. "Can I try some?" she asked curiously, not remembering whether she'd ever tried watermelon ice cream before.

"No." he refused her bluntly.

"Aw, please? I'll give you some of mine!" she bribed, holding out her drooled-on cone.

"You know I hate alcohol, Matsumoto." he used her last name to remind her just who was in charge here.

"It's not real rum! Just tastes like it." she informed him.

He didn't budge. "And maybe I still have a problem with it."

"All right, never mind…" she gave up. There were some arguments she was never going to win.

…

"Phew! What a day, huh taicho?" Matsumoto dumped the large shopping bags she was carrying on the floor and dive-bombed onto her bed. "I think this calls for an early night, don't you?"

"Yeah, I am quite tired. God knows why, though." he muttered, running a hand through his white hair. Maybe his gigai was affecting his stamina.

"Hm." Matsumoto agreed, rolling over and over on her mattress, trying to work out the lumps in it.

"Well, I'm going to take a shower. You can go in after me, if you want." Hitsugaya offered, already making his way to the bathroom, grabbing his pyjamas as he went.

"Sure, that's fine!" Rangiku grinned at him, receiving a small smile in return. When he disappeared behind the door, she decided to paint her nails again before she went to bed. Boredom really was a menace. This was the third time in two days!

Soon enough, Hitsugaya emerged from the bathroom. "It's all yours." he told her, making his way over to his bed.

"Yay! Thanks, taicho!" she rushed to the bathroom.

"How many times have you forgotten to call me Toushiro today?" he called after her, only receiving a snorting laugh in answer. He rolled his eyes (again) and went to sleep.

…

About half an hour later, Rangiku entered the shared bedroom, towelling her hair dry vigorously. She plonked down on her bed noisily and froze when she heard a quiet grunt of protest from behind her.

_Huh? Taicho's already asleep? He really must've been tired, _she thought, smiling over at the cute sight her taicho provided with his sleeping face. He really did look so peaceful. And the way he was cuddling his pillow was just too adorable!

_What an opportunity this makes... _She grinned evilly as she rooted in her bag for a camera. She was sure the Shinigami Womens' Association would appreciate some new pictures for their album.

After a short photography session, Matsumoto slid under the covers of her own bed and within five minutes started pushing out the zs. It appeared she was more tired than she'd initially realised as well.

**A/N: WOO! Photos of sleepy Shiro-chan! Avec pillow, no less! I'm making a habit of leaving all of you with a really sweet after-image...which I enjoy!**

**Sooo...last day of the shopping mission next time. I know it was quite short, but if this really happened, (SNORT! Yeah right.) I don't think it'd really take that long; they're not trying to provide for the whole of Seireitei! And also, it's kinda dull to write about. All day, every day, they are shopping. Don't get me wrong, I lurve shopping! But not so Shiro-chan, probably. Definitely. And who'd want to make him suffer more than necessary?  
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**After that...I'm not exactly sure what's going to happen. I don't feel like introducing another 'momentous' aspect of this fic, (this being one, cos it lasted for more than one chapter) so it'll probably just be back to escapades and annoyances back at Squad Ten! Sorry if that disappoints anyone, but if you have a better idea, please review/PM and tell me! Lacking inspiration here! But I may not use it, if I can't connect with the suggestion. That's not an insult, it just means that I don't think I could come up with a lot to say about it. Thanks to anyone who actually suggests something! And, by the way, I mean a storyline to last more than one chapter, not a word. I have a HUGE abundance of word requests in my notebook! *does little happy dance***

**Okay, now you lot know how to make me happy, hows about you go tickle that review button down there? Isn't it just the cutest...? XD**


	9. The Moon

**A/N: Phew! First week of school and homework done and dusted! Yay! Anyway, I was feeling slightly guilty about the not-doing-anything-with-this-fic-for-a-while thing, so I wrote this chapter up (obviously). I hope y'all like it! I certainly do!**

**This isn't quite as long as usual, excluding this A/N, it's about 1,998 words. But never mind, it took me ages to write! Sometimes, I just can't type, so I was forever making typos and having to delete stuff. Also, I'm really tired today, and couldn't proof-read it that well, so if you see a mistake, I'm very very sorry, but please forgive me!**

**Credit for this word request goes to sagitgirlth again! It was awesome, really left a lot for me to ponder on...which I only seem to be able to do ridiculously late at night. Which was when this idea was born, by the way.**

**Another brilliant response to the last chapter, I think it was two away from breaking another record! In case you guys don't know, I'm aiming for at least fifteen reviews/faves to break the record, but that is a LOT, so I can definitely understand if I don't get that much.**

**Anyhoo, here are the people I am thanking from the bottom of my heart:**

**Moemoepl**

**HikariFighter**

**The. Evil. Squirrel**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**sagitgirlth**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**the lovely anonymous reviewer who seems to be called () **

**ExtremelySlow (I'm sure you're not!)**

**Runolan**

**xXForgottenMelodyXx**

**btalover**

**and Audiomania! See how many people that is? Do you SEE how many people that is? Thanks to all of you, you're amazing! *Is amazed***

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to the wonderful Kubo Tite, who we all love, for obvious reasons. X3  
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The Moon

Rangiku cracked open her eyes and sat up, rubbing the sleep away from them. She looked around the cramped hotel room she and her taicho had been staying at for the past two days. It was pitch black, her captain only a dark shape in the blackness. He was evidently still asleep, which led her to believe it was very early indeed. Funny, she didn't feel tired at all.

Matsumoto stretched her arms out to get rid of the kinks in her back and dug around in her bag for a torch and something she could read. It was obvious she wasn't going to be able to get back to sleep any time soon, and she wasn't going to start her last day in the Living World lying bored in bed with nothing to do except try to go to sleep.

Soon enough, she found her current read: Grimm's Fairytales. She knew they were considered children's reading in the Living World, but Matsumoto had always been extremely interested in humans and their history, and these precious pieces of culture were a rare gem that was not often found where she came from.

Rangiku switched on her torch and flicked through the thick volume, stopping at her very favourite story. She couldn't believe that a human who'd seen as little of the worlds and times as most of them could have come up with a creation of such delicacy and beauty.

Matsumoto read avidly, though she already knew the story nearly by heart. She smiled when she reached the part when the princess' mother was daydreaming about the child she would oh-so-love to have.

"_A child white as snow, red as blood, and as black as the wood in this frame." _Matsumoto whispered aloud, closing her eyes to imagine better the landscape in the story; a garden covered with snow flecked only with a droplet of scarlet blood, framed with an ebony window.

Then, she glanced over at her slumbering captain. A beam of moonlight had entered through a gap in the curtains, illuminating the pillow on which he rested his head. His hair was gleaming ethereally in the rays, making it softly dazzling in its beauty.

_Ah, taicho. Hair as white as snow; mood as black as ebony, _Matsumoto thought, stifling a giggle. He was just too cute when he slept.

But no. 'Snow' was much too cliché to describe what was most definitely elegance and beauty without equal. No, his hair was much more likened to the moonlight it reflected so exquisitely; it shone subtly, reflecting the reflection of the 'real' light of the sun, but making it so much more beautiful.

She guessed that was exactly what they were: Moon and Sun. The Solar System was said to revolve solely around The Sun, and yet the centre of _her _universe was The Moon.

…_Wait, what? What am I thinking?_ Matsumoto decided it was definitely time she rested her mind.

She folded over the corner of the page she had been reading, and set the book down, turning off the torch and wandering off into the land of dreams yet again, hoping she wouldn't be too tired in the morning.

…

"All right, Rangiku. This is the last day of this ridiculous mission. We may as well make the most of it. We can probably get away with only getting a couple of things; to be frank, I really can't be bothered to go traipsing round shops for hours on end _again_ today." Hitsugaya briefed her, sitting cross-legged on his bed while she lounged on hers, head turned so she could see him.

"Okay, Toushiro! What shall we concentrate on today, then?" she inquired, flipping onto her stomach and look at him intently while she waited for an answer.

"Trousers and suchlike. We haven't got as many of those as other stuff."

"Trousers it is! Jeans are quite hard-wearing, but sometimes they can get a bit too constricting, don't you think? Should we get combat pants instead?" she wondered, looking as if she was actually taking this _seriously_. Hitsugaya wondered whether she'd got enough sleep the night before.

"We may as well just get the jeans; they're easier to find." Hitsugaya reasoned, getting to his feet.

"True," Matsumoto joined him as he walked out of the door. "Are we going back to the massive supermarket, then?"

"Yup."

…

Matsumoto sighed as she dumped the umpteenth pair of jeans in their basket. This was their fifth store; they'd decided to only get five pairs of different styles at one time, so they didn't look _too_ suspicious. They were getting quite a lot of strange looks, though.

"Oh for the love of—that's it, Matsumoto, I'm done." her captain stated blankly after yet another toddler whispered to their mum about 'scary jean-people'.

"Okay, Toushiro!" she agreed heartily, too overjoyed at the end of the boring shopping trip to remind him about the first name basis.

"Where now, though?" he asked, running a hand through his hair.

"Uh…we could go try on outfits at the…boutique…?" Matsumoto tried, trailing off at his glare. "…Or not."

"Definitely not, Rangiku. I've had enough of human clothes to last me at least three lifetimes." Hitsugaya informed her, shoulders drooping.

"Well…I would agree, but it's just the boring ones I'm sick of." she told him. "How about we go to Kisuke's place? He has good tea."

"Those kids are like the spawn of the devil…" Toushiro muttered under his breath, remembering Jinta's irritating teasing.

"Fair enough. But that only leaves us with the hotel, Toushiro."

"Yeah, I know. But right now, it seems the lesser of many, many evils." Hitsugaya said wearily, handing her the trolley so she could go and pay for the jeans. "I'll see you outside the store. I don't think I can handle much more of this place." he said bitterly, heading for the exit.

"See you, Toushiro!" She waved him off, her overly-cheerful tone clashing with his doom-and-gloom outlook on life that day.

…

Hitsugaya and Rangiku entered their room for what was hopefully the last time ever.

"Well, I can't wait until we're back in Seireitei. It'll be good to see everyone again, and apart from everything else, it's really weird calling you Toushiro." Matsumoto said, taking a flying leap onto her bed.

She landed with a massive _Crack_!

The two froze, eyes wide. Then, Matsumoto eased herself gently off the ruined bed and went to stand over by her captain, whose brain was starting to fill with images of huge repair bills that would have to be taken off his pay cheque.

"You can't really tell it's broken unless you lie on it. I think it'll be fine."

"I swear, Matsumoto," Last name again. "If we get a bill for that bed, I'll—"

"Not to worry, taicho, I'm sure nobody'll notice!" his second-in-command comforted him, patting him lightly on the back.

"Whatever. Just don't ever bounce on a bed again."

"Yes, taicho."

…

Toushiro spent the rest of the afternoon lazing around on his completely whole bed, just to rub in the fact that he actually had somewhere to lie.

Matsumoto scowled at him from her seat on the floor, unable to concentrate on the book of fairytales she was trying to read.

"Toushiro, seriously. My butt's going numb! Please let me sit on your bed! _Please_?" she pleaded, kneeling in front of him with her hands clasped together.

"Let me think about this…no." he deadpanned, secretly enjoying the irritation on his fukutaicho's face.

"I'll do paperwork without complaining or skiving off for a week!" she bribed him.

Hitsugaya considered. It wasn't often he got an offer like this. "_All _your paperwork, Matsumoto-fukutaicho?" he teased, rolling onto his stomach so he could look at her better.

"Yes, yes. Just let me on the bed!" she hurriedly agreed. That floor must have been really uncomfortable.

"Hop on, then." he granted her, shuffling over to allow her more room.

"Yay! Thank you so much, Toushiro!" she cheered, climbing onto the bed _very_ carefully and giving him a big hug.

"Gah! Let go, Mats—Rangiku!" he protested, scrambling away from her when she finally did release him.

"Okay, Toushiro!" she grinned at him mischievously, showing her set of pearly, perfectly straight teeth.

He rolled his eyes and picked up his book to start reading.

About an hour later, Hitsugaya was jolted out of his literature, when he felt two arms snake around his waist, pulling a warm body closer to his.

He looked down in alarm and saw Matsumoto with her head resting on his chest, her nose buried in his T-shirt.

"Matsumoto—" he started.

Mastumoto let out a soft snore. She was asleep, then.

…_Perfect._ Hitsugaya thought sarcastically.

Though, to be honest, he didn't particularly mind the position they were in now; Matsumoto was very warm and very comfortable. She even _smelt _heavenly.

Toushiro hesitantly inched his free arm around his lieutenant's shoulders. Ah, she was so warm.

He looked at her sleeping face with something akin to humour. _I wonder, _he thought, _how can a person who sleeps like a log all night and most of the morning take an afternoon nap too? _He pondered for a minute and then shrugged it off. Matsumoto was famous all over Seireitei for her sleeping abilities, after all. He just hoped she wouldn't wake up while they were in this suggestive position.

…

"Rangiku," Hitsugaya shook her gently. "Rangiku, it's time to get up. We're due back at Seireitei soon."

"Nngh…taicho?" Matsumoto asked sleepily, opening her eyes slowly to see her captain's face rather close to hers. She pulled back slightly. "What time is it?"

"Seven o' clock in the evening. We need to go give these gigais back to Urahara." Toushiro told her, pulling off his watermelon T-shirt and redressing in the scratchy jumper it had replaced. "And God knows I'm not giving him a free shirt."

Rangiku smiled fondly at him. She knew he'd liked it.

The two went downstairs to return their room key to the receptionist and set out for the Urahara Sh ōten.

"Good evening, Hitsugaya-kun, Rangiku-san!" the cheerful shopkeeper greeted them, smiling widely from behind his fan. "I take it you've come to return your gigais?"

"Yes." Toushiro stated simply, allowing the blond to poke his chest with the end of his cane, forcing his soul out of the faux body.

The smiling man did the same to Rangiku, and after they'd arranged the payments, the Tenth Division's senior officers exited the little shop with full-speed shunpo. How good it felt to stretch their legs again!

They went to a secluded spot hidden away from prying eyes, just in case there were humans with abnormally high reiatsu levels.

While Hitsugaya set about opening the Senkaimon, Rangiku looked up at the room, recalling her early morning ponderings.

_It's always the same. No matter whether you're looking at it from Soul Society, the Living World or Hueco Mundo, it's the same moon. Doesn't that mean we're all the same as well? _ she thought, smiling slightly.

A call from Hitsugaya reminded her that the gate was now open, and she followed her captain into the gateway.

When they emerged in Seireitei, both of them huffed an audible sigh of relief. Yes, the Living World was interesting, but there was only so much of it one could take; for once, they'd both be glad to get back to the mundane, everyday tasks that waited for them in the office.

"Come on, Matsumoto. Let's go back home." Hitsugaya said, setting off in the direction of her house.

Rangiku looked at him in surprise; that had been the first time since he moved in with her that he'd ever called her house 'home'.

She smiled gently as she followed him, his hair reflecting the moonlight and lighting an easy path for her to follow through the dusk.

_Funny, _she thought, _I never knew moonlight could look so breathtakingly beautiful._

**A/N: And there you have it! Personally, I like the reference to Snow White. Oh yeah, forgot! I don't own that either. Remember, those of you who would like to request a word, please do, and even if you don't, reviews are greatly appreciated and prompt faster updates! Thanks in advance! XD  
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	10. Starry Night Sky

**A/N: Whew! This one was really hard to write, but never mind, because here it is! I think Hitsugaya's a bit OOC though, but could you please overlook it if you think so too? I tried my best.**

**Credit for this word request goes to sagitgirlth again! Thanks for all those requests, by the way, even if I have said it before! x  
><strong>

**Another great response to the last chapter, but we still haven't broken that record yet, guys! (15 reviews/faves for a chapter, by the way) Again, I don't really mind, but it'd be awesome if I could crack 100 reviews with this chapter! Please please please!**

**So, here are the people who reviwed/faved/alerted:**

**Ziya Hitsugaya (Welcome back to the review club!)**

**The. Evil. Squirrel**

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**Thisguy**

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**Winter Lover in the Snow**

**Caspartine**

**and sun and moon! Oh, by the way, hun, do you mind if I postpone your word request until I think this fic's ready for it? Don't get me wrong, I've been waiting for someone to request that since the fic started, so thank youuuu! But yeah, I don't want to hurry the fic. Thanks again! x :)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite and his NOW UPDATED (on Wednesday) MANGA! Those of you who want to fangirl scream about the reappearance of the You-Know-Whos (anti-spoiler scheme), PM or review! That come-back really made my day... XD  
><strong>

Starry Night Sky

"Hey, taicho!" Matsumoto called as she entered the long-missed Tenth Division office. "Wow, it's really nice to call you that again! Makes it so much less awkward!"

"For once, Matsumoto, I'm going to have to agree with you there." her captain answered, scrawling his signature at the bottom of yet another report on their mission to the Living World. Why he had to do these things was incomprehensible to him. Shopping. Was that really so hard to understand?

"So…are you having fun there?" Matsumoto asked, leaning her elbows on Hitsugaya's desk and thrusting her face _way_ into his personal bubble.

"Surprisingly, no. Maybe you could help me out a bit." Hitsugaya suggested, unaffected by his fukutaicho's close proximity. At least, he _looked_ unaffected.

"Uh…Oh yeah! Just remembered; I have to…uh…go talk to…Renji about…something…bye!" Matsumoto stumbled over her own train of thought before shunpoing out of the office at top speed.

Toushiro rolled his eyes. The trip to the Living World hadn't done anything for her work ethic, then.

As the hours passed, the small captain signed paper after paper, practically losing recognition of his own signature in the process. Finally, after the third hundredth and seventy fifth document, (yes, he kept count) Hitsugaya threw his brush down and gave up. There was no way Central 46 needed _all_ of this rubbish. He could have sworn he'd read the same paper at least six times.

In need of a break and a puff of fresh air, Toushiro pushed his chair back and marched outside into the chilly air. Winter was on its way, and he'd probably have to start putting the radiator on in the office if he didn't want Matsumoto complaining about her chilblains all the time.

Unsure of where exactly to go, Hitsugaya wandered aimlessly around the unending alleyways of Seireitei, nodding at the odd shinigami that crossed his path. Eventually, his meandering led him to the Fifth Division office, where, even from outside, he could hear Hinamori and her kindly-looking captain conversing amiably about tea or whatever. He rapped smartly on the door, and at the "Come in," Aizen-taicho offered, opened the door and stepped briskly over the threshold.

"Hitsugaya-kun!" Hinamori greeted him happily, choosing to overlook the warning glare he sent her about their pre-discussed title arrangement.

"Hinamori," he smiled slightly. Then he turned to the captain and nodded stiffly. "Aizen."

"A pleasure to see you, Hitsugaya-taicho." the man smiled warmly, causing Toshiro to grimace slightly. For some reason, that guy gave him the creeps.

"Yes, Hitsugaya-kun! You don't come over here often. How was your mission?" Hinamori asked, absently scribbling her paperwork as she spoke.

"Fine, thanks for asking. And it's true; I don't come here that often, so I decided to pay you a visit and see how you're getting on." he lied camly. He didn't really think the fact that he only got here by pure chance was that important, and anyway; what Hinamori didn't know wouldn't hurt her.

"Oh, that's so sweet, Shiro-chan!" she cooed, momentarily forgetting the shaky respect he had forced her to show him, "I'm doing great!"

"Yes, Hinamori-kun is really getting on excellently." Aizen said, his fixed smile making Hitsugaya think that somehow, the words had a double meaning.

He narrowed his eyes. "Yes, well, that's good." he offered lamely, unable to think up a better answer.

"The paperwork's kind of dull, though," Hinamori complained, pouting slightly before sitting up straight as a poker and spinning round to face her beloved captain. "Not that I mind, Aizen-taicho, I wasn't really complaining, really, it's no trouble at all, I—"

"Hinamori-kun. Don't worry, I know paperwork is slightly monotonous sometimes; no one can be expected to actually fully enjoy it. You've been working hard; why don't you take a well-earned break and go for a walk with Hitsugaya-taicho? There's not really that much left to do, so I'll be fine." he reassured her at the inevitable protest that was almost definitely already forming on her tongue.

"Thank you, Aizen-taicho! I'll come back soon to help clear up the office!" Hinamori chirped, grabbing Toushiro's wrist and pulling him out of the building behind her. "So, where shall we go?" she asked, turning to the slightly scowling captain behind her.

"It doesn't really matter. We could just wander about if you'd prefer. I'm sure you wouldn't want to spend too much time away from your darling Aizen-taicho." he wrinkled his nose, saying the man's name disdainfully. It wasn't that he was jealous of the Fifth Division captain, just that he didn't want Hinamori so attached to him. It was dangerous in this type of work; a small accident on a Hollow Extermination mission, and her heart would be broken irreparably, so that even he wouldn't be able to fix it.

"That's fine!" Hinamori completely missed the bitterness in his voice. "But, Hitsugaya-kun, what's wrong? You have something on your mind, don't you?" she looked concerned.

Hitsugaya stared at her in surprise. He knew she was observant, but he really didn't expect her to be _that_ perceptive. He'd spent decades mastering his poker face, after all. "Yes, I guess I do." he admitted finally, averting his gaze to the ground directly in front of his feet.

"Well, why don't you tell me about it while we walk?" Hinamori suggested, already starting off towards the west, where they could see the sun just beginning to set.

"Sure," He followed her swiftly, soon catching up to her side again.

"So what's up?" his childhood friend asked, turning her head towards him and smiling encouragingly.

Hitsugaya smiled back. Hinamori knew him well; he didn't need secrets pried out of him if he was willing to tell them. "It's just…I don't really feel as if I'm doing anything." he informed her.

"Huh?"

"Well, that's not it exactly. I just feel I'm not really affecting people's lives that much. I mean, sure I exterminate Hollows and save souls and stuff, but I'm not really doing anything to make them happy, am I?" he vented, throwing his hands up in the air. "Hinamori, am I too young to be having a midlife crisis?"

"Not at all," she giggled, covering her mouth with her hand, "But I don't really think I should be the one you come to for stuff like this."

"Huh? What do you mean?" Hitsugaya was confused.

"Well, you know me, and I know you. We've been friends for ages and ages. If I told you, 'you're doing fine, don't worry about it', you wouldn't really take notice, would you? Would you?" she repeated. Hitsugaya paused, then shook his head hesitantly. "And why's that? Because I'd say that whatever the real answer was, because you're my friend and because I want to make you happy. So talking to me wouldn't really help you." she finished.

Toushiro stared at her, speechless. She was sure feeling deep today, wasn't she? "…I guess, yeah." he agreed hesitantly, nodding his head slowly. "But then who should I talk to?"

"How about you try Rangiku-san?" His head snapped up, surprise evident in his eyes "I mean, you guys work together, right? And you understand each other. But you know she'll be honest with you, and not just give you the answer you want to hear."

He nodded slowly, soaking up the not-so-new-found information. "I suppose you're right," he acknowledged, stopping in his steps and smiling gently at her when she followed suit. "Thanks, Hinamori. I take it you're good to walk back to your office on your own?" he asked, knowing she would understand that he had to get this matter off his shoulders as soon as possible.

"Sure, Hitsugaya-kun. Take care now, and I hope you find the answer to your questions!" she well-wished him, taking off in the direction of her Squad.

Hitsugaya stayed there a minute, before flash stepping to his own office, where he could clearly sense his fukutaicho's reiatsu.

"Taicho! You're back! I was wondering where you'd got to!" she called out to him, beaming from her place on the couch.

"I took a walk with Hinamori. I see you didn't take the initiative to start on some paperwork in my absence," he noted, raising an eyebrow, though he wasn't really that angry. To be frank, he hadn't expected anything anyway.

"No, sorry," she grinned, not apologetic at all.

"Well, never mind." he sighed, pushing his hair back from his face and sitting down at his desk to start working again.

"Hm? Taicho, are you okay?" Matsumoto asked, her brow creasing slightly when she realised her captain didn't look quite himself.

"Yeah, I'm fine, but…"

"But?"

"Matsumoto, can I ask you something?" he started, taking a deep breath.

"...Sure. But why?" she looked slightly puzzled.

"While I was walking with Hinamori, I told her about something that's been…worrying me for a while recently." he admitted, swallowing subtly when she walked over to put her face nearer his in curiosity.

"Worrying you? Is everything alright, taicho?"

"Yes, I'm just being irrational. But I was thinking…I don't really _do_ anything."

Matsumoto raised a disbelieving eyebrow.

"I mean, to affect peoples' lives!"

The other eyebrow joined it.

"Well—I just feel like I should be doing more to help them. They aren't happy when I save them from Hollows and send them to Rukongai. I…want to let them be happy." he mumbled, lowering his face and letting his shoulders droop.

"Wow, taicho. Did you get enough sleep last night?" asked Matsumoto, "You're acting really weird today."

"…" Her captain glared at her.

"But I don't think you have anything to worry about. There's no way anyone could make everyone they meet happy, it's just not possible! The best thing you can do is keep _yourself_ happy, and do your job well."

"I guess, but—"

"No, that's the truth. To make people close to you happy, you need to be happy yourself. If we keep all of our friends close, then eventually, there won't be anyone left without at least one person to help them. There won't be any sadness, suffering or loneliness. Isn't that what everyone wants, deep down, taicho? Look at the stars, for instance," she said, gesturing at the now-dark night sky through the office window, "Do they seem upset? Or lonely? No, even though none of them physically help each other, they're all there for one another, giving everyone support. The stars are the perfect society, taicho, that's why everyone looks up to them and wishes subconsciously to be with them. You don't need to go around doing a crap-load of good deeds for random strangers just because it makes you feel like you're worth something; all you need to do is smile at them, and that'll immediately make their day better. You have a lovely smile, taicho." she finished, looking at him gently for a moment before shifting her gaze to the stars.

Hitsugaya was speechless. Apparently everyone was feeling philosophical today. "…Matsumoto…thanks." Hinamori had been right; she really had helped him a lot.

"Any time, taicho." she replied, getting up to exit the office. "I'll make you some tea for when you get home. Don't work too late, okay?" she advised, giving him an unexpected gently hug before leaving the room.

Hitsugaya sat motionless for a second, then smiled and picked up his brush to start working again. He should be finishing up quite soon.

He thought about what Matsumoto had told him, and decided it was true. Though he didn't agree with her comment on his smile; hers was infinitely more radiant.

**A/N: Naw~ Hitsugaya thinks Matsumoto's smile is radiant! Ain't that just the sweetest thang? (I don't know why I wrote it like that, I'm English...)**

**Oh, an this happened with another chapter, so those of you who didn't get it, this chapter's called Starry Night Sky because Matsumoto used it in her philosophical thingy. I swear, That's the longest paragraph I've ever written.**

**Again, reviews are very very much appreciated, and I would love to crack 100! Everyone have a nice day! x**


	11. Dancing

**A/N: Dear God...I'm exhausted. This week, I had exams Wednesday and Friday, I have a Biology ISA starting...yesterday, an English controlled assessment coming up in the next couple of weeks, and a HUGE pile of homework! Which, thankfully, is all done now! I really hope today never repeats itself...**

**This was another really great chapter to write, but I did it in little bit at a time between homework assignments and the like, which is a bit different to what I usually do. I love this one! Thanks a bundle to sagitgirlth (again!) for requesting this amazing word that got my brain cells ticking! Remember, all you reviewers, I'm still accepting word requests, so...REQUEST THEM! That is all I have to say in this paragraph.**

**Now, in this paragraph, I'd just like to say: OH MY GAWWWDDDD! 100 REVIEWS EVERYONE! Woot! Yay, this is the earliest time I've ever reached 100 before...thanks so much to all you amazing people! **

**Said amazing people:**

**tish246**

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**and YinYang94! And, guess what! Not only has this fic reached 100 reviews (and passed it), but WE HAVE BROKEN THE ACKNOWLEDGEMENT RECORD! That was fifteen reviewers/favouriters/alerters, people, feel free to gape in awe at their amazingness! XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite and his unbelievable manga!  
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Dancing

"Matsumoto! Where are you hiding? For the last time, just finish the paperwork already! I blankly refuse to do it for you again!" Hitsugaya called into the Tenth Division training grounds, where he _knew _Matsumoto was hiding. You could call it intuition, but really, anybody who wouldn't know her location in his position would be a moron, seeing as she went there _every time_ she wanted to slack off in secret.

After hearing a quickly stifled giggle, Hitsugaya snapped around and pounced behind a bunch of greenery behind him. There hadn't been rain for quite some time, and the ground was frosted in the throes of winter, making the soil _very_ hard indeed. Luckily, or not, as it had absolutely nothing to do with luck, the young captain landed headfirst instead on a very warm and very soft heap of lieutenant.

While she was still slightly disorientated at his out-of-character use of full body contact, Hitsugaya firmly secured Matsumoto's wrists above her head with his hands and her hips with his knees, effectively preventing any methods of escape on her part.

"Gah! Taicho, you can't just jump right onto my stomach like that!" Matsumoto gasped, realising the game was up after spending a couple of seconds struggling.

"Funny that, I seem to find it perfectly possible." Hitsugaya retorted sardonically, not letting up his grip on her frame.

"You know what I mean," She rolled her eyes, "And anyway, taicho, why are you out in this freezing weather? You'll catch a cold!"

Toushiro snorted, unimpressed. "Well, you see, Matsumoto, I came to find you for that _very_ reason. Skiving off work and hiding under a _bush_ outside in winter really isn't the most intelligent thing to do in the circumstances, now is it? You could at least be _slightly_ more inventive."

Matsumoto huffed, and Hitsugaya could practically _see_ her racing mind through her eye sockets, working feverishly to figure out a way of escape.

"Taicho, do I really have to work today?" she tried.

"Yes, Matsumoto. Just like you have to work _every_ day, but never do."

"Even though I'm on my period?" she added, drawing the dreaded 'feminine issues' card.

"Even then."

"…Wow, taicho. You're the only one that's ever beaten _that _trick. Even Yama-jii fell for it." she told him, attempting to make him lose his guard.

"That isn't going to work either, Matsumoto." he told her frankly.

"…Damn."

"Come on," he said, getting to his feet and pulling her up, all the while securing a firm hold on her person to prevent escape, "Though it may not look like it, I do not actually enjoy freezing my toes off trying to get you to come willingly. Now, get to the office, or I swear to God, Matsumoto, I will freeze you to your chair until you finish all the paperwork you're supposed to."

"What? Taicho, that's so unfair!"

"That may be so, Matsumoto, but you should know by now that I really don't care."

"…Touché," she allowed him grudgingly.

Hitsugaya smirked and led her firmly by the arm back to the Tenth Division office.

…

"Done!" Matsumoto announced, stretching her arms out in front of her to relieve the strain she'd been putting on her shoulders.

"Already?" her captain asked, "That was quick. For you, I mean,"

"Thanks, taicho. Thanks so much," Matsumoto said sarcastically. Then, her cheery persona returned. "You finished all your rubbish half an hour ago, right?" she asked eagerly, turning to him with a beam on her face.

"…Yes," he affirmed hesitantly.

"Cool!"

"What are you planning, Matsumoto?" Toushiro asked, slightly apprehensive of what was definitely about to come.

"Well…the Eleventh Division's holding a…uh, party," she stalled, not quite sure whether to call the shindig a 'party', or just a hullabaloo. "And Madarame and Yumichika invited me, with a plus-one. So I was thinking you'd like to come!" she completed proudly.

"No," Hitsugaya didn't even think about it.

"Aw, please, taicho!" Rangiku started, having already planned for such an outcome.

"No. The Eleventh does not host parties. The Eleventh hosts wrestling matches and drinking competitions under the façade of a social gathering."

"Well…yeah, but you don't have to get involved in any of that, taicho!"

Toushiro rolled his eyes. "Yes, I know that, Matsumoto; it's _you_ I'm worried about. You'll inevitably get wasted and have to spend the rest of the week in your insanely bright room 'recuperating'." he accurately predicted, recalling with mild horror his past experiences with Matsumoto's party aftermath.

"Fine, fine. Taicho, if you come with me to the…thingy, I won't drink a drop. For a week." Matsumoto recklessly vowed.

Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. "A week? Isn't that just a little bit too ambitious?" he asked sceptically.

"…Yeah, maybe it is. Fine, I won't drink anything during the…seriously, taicho, what are we going to call it?" She threw her hands up in exasperation.

"It doesn't need a name. God knows it doesn't deserve one." Toushiro wrinkled his nose.

"Okay, taicho, now you're being mean. The Eleventh's parties aren't _that_ bad!"

"You only think that because you drink so much at them you can't remember a thing afterwards." her captain retorted hotly.

"Nuh uh, taicho! That's just where you're wrong! When I get hangovers, all I have is a headache and nausea; I never forget anything!" she revealed proudly.

"So you were lying that time you said you'd forgotten to hand in the paperwork because you'd fetched a couple of drinks along the way." Hitsugaya stated.

Matsumoto froze. "Uh…yeah," she admitted sheepishly.

Toushiro rolled his eyes in disgust. "Whatever. And I'll come to that stupid party with you; even if it is only to make sure you don't break your no-drinking promise."

"Kya! Thanks so much, taicho! You're the best!" Rangiku squealed, glomping him violently before turning on her heel and high-tailing it to the Eleventh Division barracks to tell its Third and Fifth seats the good news.

"…Why am I doing this again?" Hitsugaya asked the empty air. Then, he shrugged his shoulders and exited the office himself. He may as well take a shower before the night's…event.

…

Hitsugaya groaned loudly and covered his ears. This was absolutely awful. The blaring music from the trashy speaker on the other side of the snacks table was nothing short of deafening, and, as if that wasn't bad enough, there were people actually _dancing_ to this sh—

"Taichooooo! C'mon, lezz dance!" Mastumoto slurred, grabbing him by the hand and attempting to pull him onto the dance floor.

Toushiro easily stood his ground. He levelled a glare at his vice captain. "Matsumoto. I do believe you gave me your word that you wouldn't drink any alcohol during the night."

"Yessss, but the only thing I drank wuz the p-punch…s'all fruit 'n there!" she cheered drunkenly, wobbling slightly.

"…I'm sure,"

"Sooo, come _on_! Let's dance, taicho!" she repeated, only slightly more comprehensibly.

"I refuse. This is ridiculous and I have no idea why I let you persuade me into this thing."

"Cuz ya love me, taicho! Everyone does!"

"Yeah, yeah." He rolled his eyes. "But seriously, Matsumoto; it's past midnight now, and even though we don't have work tomorrow, I think you should go to bed. To be frank, I'm not sure you'll be able to stay on your feet much longer." he stated, his point only supported by Matsumoto stumbling forward half a step for no apparent reason.

"Naw, taichooo, don' be meeean…Jus' another hour…" she pleaded, clasping her hands in front of her face.

"No. Come on, I'm taking you home," Toushiro grabbed her by the shoulders and manoeuvred her through the gyrating crowd and into the cool night air. "There. Doesn't that feel better?" he asked.

"Mm," was his only reply.

"Matsumoto? You aren't actually falling asleep on me here, are you?" the captain asked, panicking slightly. It was a long walk back to Matsumoto's house, and executing it with an unconscious lieutenant in tow over the icy ground would be damn near impossible.

"Hm? Nah, I was just feeling the nice cold air. I'm feeling a bit better now, taicho. Thanks," she smiled at him, already semi-sober.

Hitsugaya chuckled lightly. She'd always recovered from her stupors quickly. "Let's get you home," he suggested, prodding her back to get her to start walking in the direction of the house.

"Taicho?"

"Yeah?" He raised his eyes to hers.

"Sorry for breaking my promise about the drinking. Although, in my defence, I had no idea the punch had alcohol in it."

Toushiro sighed. "It's alright, I guess. I was being slightly over-optimistic in that particular scenario, wasn't I?"

"A bit, yeah," she giggled.

The rest of the walk was spent in companiable silence, with Hitsugaya staring at the ground passing under his feet and Matsumoto gazing up at the stars, miraculously not bumping into anything.

When the two reached the house, Rangiku unlocked the door and stepped inside. She took a deep breath and smiled when the homely scent of cleanly washed clothes and fabric hit her nose.

"Yeah, I'm much better now, taicho. Thanks for pulling me out when you did; I'd have probably done something really embarrassing if you'd left me in there any longer." she admitted, plonking herself down on the couch.

"You know I wouldn't have let that happen, Matsumoto," her captain sat down next to her, smiling at her softly when her gaze met his.

"I know. Thanks anyway, though,"

"You're welcome,"

Another few minutes were spent in silence, then, all of a sudden, Matsumoto piped up again.

"Taicho? Why don't you like dancing?"

Toushiro groaned, letting his head fall back to hit the edge of the sofa. He'd known this was coming. "It's not that I don't like it, just that I don't like to dance in public," he told her, averting his eyes.

"…So you never dance." she concluded.

"Well…no," he affirmed.

"We're gonna have to change that, taicho! Dancing's brilliant! Though to be fair, I can't really see you raving in a nightclub," she mused, choking back laughter at the very thought.

"God, no! I've only ever danced with Hinamori, and that was when we were kids. My grandmother had some old records from the Human World." he informed her, wincing ever so slightly at the memories. Obviously that particular episode hadn't gone well.

"Do you want to dance with me?" she asked quizzically, putting her head to one side.

His head snapped up to gawk at her. "What? Matsumoto, are you sure you're not still a bit drunk?" he interrogated, putting his face slightly nearer her own to check for a flush on her cheeks. Well, of course there was one there _now_, after he'd so kindly given her a magnificent close up of his undeniably handsome face.

"That's rude, taicho. I ask if you want to dance with me and you think I'm smashed. That's just insulting." she scowled, slightly wounded.

"Ah…yes, sorry. That was slightly out of order. But you took me by surprise. Why would you want to dance with _me_?" he said, putting emphasis on the personal pronoun.

"Who else would I want to dance with? Everyone else just wants to grope my ass or whatever. Well, not Yumichika, but we all know why _that_ is," she guffawed, remembering with fondness her rather camp friend.

"Uh…" Toushiro had no idea what to say. Trust Matsumoto to make an otherwise friendly atmosphere incomprehensibly awkward. "Well, in that case, sure. I'll dance with you," he said, if only to lighten the mood slightly.

"Really? Awesome!" Matsumoto enthused, although minimally surprised. She stood up, dragging him with her into an upright position. Then, she put on hand on his shoulder, looping his arm around her waist, and grasped the other firmly with her free hand.

Hitsugaya blushed faintly, looking at the ground. Matsumoto released his hand momentarily to lift his chin up.

"Don't look at the floor, taicho, look at me!" she half commanded, refusing to let anything get in the way of this more-than-perfect moment.

"It gives me a crick in my neck," he complained, screwing up his nose at her unconsciously.

"Well then, it's your own fault for being so short, now isn't it?" she accused, bursting out laughing at the expression on his face. "Don't worry taicho, I'm just teasing. But try and look up, okay?"

"Okay…" he muttered, already regretting agreeing to this. Matsumoto got under his skin too easily.

Rangiku pulled his body a bit closer to hers, making his blush that much more dark, then started swaying gently, shifting her feet only centimetres at a time.

Hitsugaya stumbled slightly, regained his balance and started swaying along with her internal tempo. It wasn't an amazing dance, but seeing as it was his first in close to forty years, he was pretty proud of himself.

The pair rocked together slowly, Matsumoto sliding her hands around his shoulders in favour of their previous positions. Toushiro looped his own arms around her waist, closing his eyes so he could feel more of the unfamiliar emotion that was seeping into his brain.

Matsumoto seemed to feel it too, as her hands tightened their grip on the back of his neck, pulling him forward into a warm embrace that, for once, didn't land his face in her cleavage.

Rangiku inhaled the scent of her taicho's hair deeply; what kind of shampoo did he freaking use? It smelt amazing!

But when she thought about it, she'd probably think her taicho smelt amazing even if he hadn't washed his hair for a week. He was just so…

_Woah there, Rangiku! Stop that thought right there, _she commanded herself, pulling back marginally from their embrace.

He glanced up at her, eyes first confused, then widened in realisation, then downright mortified.

_Whoops, _she thought. Maybe she'd pushed that one a little bit too far.

"Uh…Mat-Matsumoto, uh, I didn't mean to—well, I—" he burbled, his normal calm completely shattered.

"What are you so het up about, taicho? It was me who started it, I don't mind!" she consoled him, smiling humorously at her captain's burning face.

"Well, it wasn't…very proper of me. I apologise, Matsumoto," he said, ducking his head in what looked suspiciously like shame.

"Huh? What for?" she asked, incredulous.

"You…you told me that everyone else you danced with tried to…uh, yeah, so I thought that maybe you thought I was—"

"Don't be ridiculous, taicho! It was just a hug, and anyway; I know you'd never do anything like that!" she laughed.

Toushiro gulped. "Good," He blinked, his composure finally returning to him.

"Thanks for dancing with me, by the way, taicho. It was fun!" she told him, earning herself a raised eyebrow.

"Don't lie, Matsumoto. I know I'm not good. At all," he added seriously.

"Don't be daft; you're fine! Now accept my gratitude, I'm serious; it made me feel really special, seeing as you've only ever danced with Momo before, and you're known her since…what? Forever?"

Hitsugaya snorted. "Hardly. But you're welcome, Matsumoto. Although, next time, maybe we should try it with some music, don't you think?" he suggested, smirking at her.

"Sure! See you in the morning, then!" she wished him goodnight, pausing only to plant a soft kiss on his right cheek.

Hitsugaya was much too stunned to reciprocate the well-wishes.

**A/N: Awwwww~~~*squee* Shiro-chan got kissed! So cuuttteee...talking about the mental image writing that particular scene left me, by the way...**

**Soo...did'ja like it? I really hope so, but tell me your opinion in a REVIEW! Yay~**

**I really think I should go to bed now...the last time I thought that was two hours ago. *Sleeeeeppp* -_-**


	12. Eyes

**A/N: And here's the next instalment! Yeah it's short, suckish and uninspired, but I'm not feeling that great today, and seeing as I've finished all my homework for the day, and didn't want to leave you lot with no update at all this weekend (going out tomorrow), I decided to write this up. I'm not going to kid you. It's really short. But...yeah. I don't think I'm capable of doing huuuuge loooong (for me) chapters _every_ week. Hope y'all ain't too disappointed!**

**Credit for this word request goes to sagitgirlth again! Thank you for all your awesome suggestions and stuff, and see, it _did_ get me through the whole of January! (Look back at the A/N for a few chapters back if you're confused)**

**Slightly disappointing response for the last chapter, but I know it wasn't that great, so...yeah. I appreciate it if you guys'd review anyways, though! *puppy eyes* But anyhoo, thankydoodledoo to all those who did review/fave/etc! Who are:**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**btalover**

**bandgirlz, who I'm just going to quickly explain where this fic is going to. Bear with me for a sec. OK, basically, yes, you were right, the chapters are going to be relatively unconnected drabble-type chapters, because I'm not that great with long storylines (I get bored VERY easily). Sorry if that disappoints! And also, their relationship's gonna develop _really_ slowly, as I think this is one of the more delicate pairings in Bleach and I wouldn't want to hurry it. Hopefully things should pick up soon, though, but I actually have no idea whether they will. This fic's practically writing itself, and I can't really plan it as the chapters are based on word requests from other people. Hope this explained everything you're unsure about, and I apologise for the not-good chapter last time. **

**Back to the acknowledgements!**

**sagitgirlth**

**izutsu**

**Thousand Sakura**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**and Ice Prince Hitsugaya! Woot! Thanks to all of yous~~**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit is awarded to Kubo Tite!  
><strong>

Eyes

Matsumoto squinted at the page in front of her. The words just wouldn't swim into focus. Couple that with the splitting headache she'd had ever since she picked up the damn thing, and the result was an extremely bad start to her day.

Rangiku tutted and threw the sheet back onto her desk. The one time she agreed to help her taicho with his paperwork, and she couldn't even look at the words! Maybe it was a hangover from the glass of...water she'd had last night.

She sighed and rested her chin on her hand. No, she definitely wasn't suffering from the aftermath of a fun night out; she wouldn't feel so annoyed about it if that was the case.

So that meant they'd decided to give her trouble again.

Mastumoto decided the best thing she could do was wait till the headache at least went away so she could do some work. Meanwhile, she rested her head on the desk and closed her eyes.

"_Matsumoto ,there's something you need to see," came the familiar voice of her captain from behind her._

_She turned to look him in the eye, but for some reason, his face was blurred. Come to think of it, so was everything else. Matsumoto shrugged it off as a heat haze or something and tried to focus on whatever her taicho was lecturing her about._

"_...new invention from the Living World. It allows us to communicate with others from far away; you just have to key in a specific series of numbers for the person you want to contact," Apparently, that was the last half of his explanation._

"_Huh? Taicho, why are you showing me a cell phone?" Matsumoto asked, finally realising what the blurred object in the boy's hands was. "Those were invented in 1946," she informed him, pulling the date out of the dusty confines of her memory._

"_What are you talking about, you idiot?" Huh, that was new. Taicho didn't usually insult her. "These are completely radical. Nothing like this has ever been seen before."_

"_Uh...yes they have, taicho," she contradicted, wondering vaguely where his mind had been for the past fifty years or so. I mean, Soul Society used these things _all_ the time._

"_No they haven't. Now I need you to fill out this form for me, stating that you're happy to use one of these." He told her, passing her the sheet of paper._

"_Okay, whatever," she said flippantly, glancing down at the document. _

_It was blank._

"_Um, taicho, I think you might have made a mistake. There's nothing written on this paper," she told him, wondering for a moment whether it was a fail joke. Then she remembered her taicho didn't play jokes on people, fail or not._

"_Of course there is. Give it here," he commanded, taking the paper from her hand. "Look, see? 'Form of Consent for Use of Cellular Telephone on Missions and Other Necessities'. Right there," He pointed at the top of the page, where the supposed title was._

"_I don't see anything, taicho." Matsumoto frowned, wondering if she was colour-blind and it was written in red or something._

"_Don't be ridiculous, Matsumoto. Is this some sort of joke?" he asked her, looking annoyed._

"_I could ask you the same thing!" she accused hotly, crossing her arms in front of her generous bust._

"_Well I can assure you I am not playing a prank on you. It would be pointless and counter-productive. Now sign the form!" he ordered, shoving the accursed piece of paper back into her hands._

"_Where?" she retorted, grabbing a pen._

"_The line that goes across the entire width of the page with the words 'Sign Here' in bold above it," he instructed her snarkily, obviously very irritated now._

"_What line?"_

"That_ line!"_

"_I don't see any line!"_

"_...Are you blind?" he asked bluntly._

"_What? No!" she cried, injured, glaring at his very blurred face, wondering if she were to concentrate hard enough, would she be able to burn a hole in his forehead. "I can see fine!" she lied._

"_How many fingers am I holding up?" came the question, accompanied by the fuzzy figure moving a part of its body next to the blob on top of the bigger blob that reached the floor._

"_Uh...three?" she guessed, squinting._

"_No. One," he revealed. "It appears you need glasses, Matsumoto,"_

"_What?" she gasped."_

"_You heard me."_

"No!" Matsumoto jerked awake, snapping upright from her position slouched on her desk fast enough to tip her chair backwards and dump herself hard on the floor.

"...Are you alright?" her captain asked from his place at his desk, looking down at her with mild humour.

"Ow...yeah, just bumped my head, that's all," she told him, getting up and righting her chair again.

"What were you dreaming about?" he inquired, allowing a small smirk to cross his face.

Matsumoto's eyes bugged out of her head. "Oh my God! I'm blind!" she wailed, covering her face with her hands.

"How many fingers am I holding up, Matsumoto?"

...This was beginning to sound horribly familiar.

Matsumoto slowly turned her head to look at her taicho, who was currently holding up his hand. "...Four," she said quietly, seeing that her sight wasn't too blurry; just a bit fuzzy around the edges.

"Correct. So you evidently aren't blind. Now go do the paperwork. I'm thinking of letting you take an early lunch if you complete it all before midday."

"Midday? Are you joking, taicho? That's only half an hour away!" she squawked disbelievingly, gaping at her captain.

"Well, it would have been perfectly possible had you not fallen asleep," he reminded her, smirking.

Matsumoto mouth dropped even wider. Well, he wasn't going to get away with that one! She'd go to hell before she told him she needed glasses. "In that case, I think I'll take my lunch break now. See you at the house later, taicho!" She shunpoed out of the door.

"Wha—_Matsumoto_!" he yelled after her. Then he groaned and looked over at the huge stack of paperwork still waiting for his attention.

_...Dammit. I knew her offer was too good to be true,_ he thought bitterly.

**A/N: Yep, it's short. And silly. But I hope you weren't too disgusted by it! They won't all be this bad (I hope), I just need to get over my period of no inspiration.**

**So, the usual, please review, no flames, see you next time!**

**^o^ - cute, huh?**


	13. Virgin

**A/N: So...yeah. I know I said I was going out today, and, in my defence, I _was_. But then the car broke down, so now I'm not.**

**After it died, I thought, 'The last chapter was really bad...and the one before that wasn't that great either...should I do two updates in a row...? But...then what about reviews? (I'm a complete review whore) ...Aw, what the hell. They deserve a better update.'**

**AND HERE IS THE BETTER UPDATE! I really like this one. Good length, good plotline (courtesy of Ice Prince Hitsugaya, THANK YOU! You make my life that much easier...) good word prompt (again, courtesy of Ice Prince Hitsugaya. X3) Yeah. I like this one. Anyone who doesn't...too bad. XP**

**Considering it's been less than twenty-four hours, (has it? I started this just after lunch...*checks watch* OMG I SPENT TWO AND A HALF HOURS ON THIS! YOU LOT HAD BETTER LIKE IT! Jokes...) I had an awesome response to the last chapter, even though it wasn't that great and there were some complaints about the length/pointlessness of it. And, just to say, I COMPLETELY AGREE WITH ALL OF THOSE COMPLAINTS! It was short, it was pointless, and it wasn't as good as some other chapters. Complaints are good, as long as they're worded politely. Flames will be used to fry bacon, as was kindly suggested by Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon. I hope you flamers out there like bacon! XD**

**So, here is the massive-huge response of fast reviewers/favouriters:**

**MiaRiddley**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**The. Evil. Squirrel**

**Da Two Peoples, also known as Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon! And to clarify, I don't mind joint reviews AT ALL. Your comments made me ROFLMAO. Big time. XD**

**Vixenlive**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya (hope you enjoy this one, you plotline suggestion was awesome, even though I've said it before)**

**ChieLuvsBleach (so does tii-chan17!)**

**hitsufan (as I said before, I COMPLETELY AGREE! And sorry...)**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**and Keiren-Kun89! Hey guys, twelve reviews, one alert and two faves? That's pretty good for one day! Luv all o' ya! X3**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite and his Manga of Badassness. And yes, that is a word. (In my mind)  
><strong>

Virgin

"Please, taicho!"

"No."

"_Please_, taicho!"

"No."

"Please please _please with a crap-load of watermelons on top, taicho!_"

"...No."

Matsumoto huffed and gave up. "You're so mean. Any other captain would have agreed by now. I mean, it's not like we're going to get really smashed or anything; it's just a drinking party,"

"And that would be my point, Matsumoto." Her captain replied coolly, raising one eyebrow.

"But we wouldn't get that drunk! You could even come along to limit the amount of sake there!" Matsumoto bargained, trying desperately to get Hitsugaya to cave. She should have known when her turn came round to host a drinking party for her pub group that she'd have her work cut out for her just trying to get a freaking _location_. Stingy-ass taicho...

"Matsumoto, are you seriously suggesting that I come along to one of your drinking parties?"

"...Uh, yeah?" Rangiku tried, wondering where she'd gone wrong.

"Absolutely and inexplicably no."

"Why not?"

"..." Hitsugaya wasn't even going to grace that one with an answer.

"But seriously taicho, if I don't organise this get-together, I'll be letting all my friends down! I promised I'd get it sorted for this month!" she said desperately, still trying to persuade him to agree.

But unfortunately, all her efforts were in vain. "Then it was your fault for making a promise you couldn't keep," he informed her, turning on his heel to exit the bright living room that was currently the sole witness to their argument.

"It's hardly my fault I can't keep it." Matsumoto grumbled under her breath.

Toushiro halted in the doorway, then suddenly turned to face her again. Matsumoto looked up in surprise to see what he had to say.

"Tell you what, Matsumoto, I'll make a deal with you: I will allow you to host this party, as long as—"

"Woo! Thanks so much taicho, you're the best! I'm gonna go tell everyone now!" she cheered, attempting to shunpo out the door before he could drop the conditions of the deal onto her head.

Hitsugaya grabbed the back of her shihakusho as she passed, effectively halting her escape. "Wait just one moment, Matsumoto. I was going to say, I will allow you to host this party in the Tenth Division barracks, but only if you comply with the following demands: one, you do all of your paperwork for a month. Don't complain, it may shock you, but most lieutenants do all of their paperwork _all _the time."

"Pff," Matsumoto scoffed, "Do you seriously believe that, taicho? It's only Nanao-chan who does _all_ of it,"

"...Shut up, Matsumoto. My second condition is that I am allowed to strictly limit the amount of alcohol consumed. No person is allowed more than one bottle each, do you hear me?" he ordered, shaking her slightly to emphasise his point.

"What? One bottle? Taicho, that's completely—"

"It's either one or nothing, Matsumoto," he reminded her.

"...Please continue, Hitsugaya-taicho," she addressed him formally, although not without gritted teeth.

"Thank you, Matsumoto-fukutaicho. My third—don't make that face, it's the last one," he informed her irritably. "Anyway, my third and final condition is that I am to be able to keep a close eye on all of you; both to make sure that none of you lot consume more than the specified amount of alcohol and to ensure that no one goes around irritating other people in case they manage to get intoxicated on one bottle of sake."

"Like that'd happen. We're hardly lightweights, taicho," Matsumoto scoffed, rolling her eyes.

Her captain released his hold on Matsumoto's shihakusho, causing her to fall heavily on her rear.

"Ow! That was completely unnecessary!" she protested.

He ignored her and made to exit the room again. "I'll be expecting all of your friends to be in the barracks by seven. If they're late, they won't be coming in. You got that?" he asked, without turning round.

"Yeah, yeah..." Matsumoto grumbled, wondering how she was going to tell everyone about all these annoying rules.

"See you then, Matsumoto. I'm going over to see Hinamori for a bit," he said, finally passing through the doorway.

"Bye," Matsumoto offered, though he was already far out of earshot. She checked the clock on the wall and jumped up, swearing.

_Six thirty? How am I supposed to tell everyone about 'The Conditions' in half an hour! This is what comes of procrastinating... _she groaned mentally. _May as well tell Abarai first. He'll probably be able to make sure Madarame and Yumichika know._

...

"Yes?"

"Ah! Kuchiki-taicho! Didn't expect to see you here!" Matsumoto yelled, surprised.

"This happens to be my office, Matsumoto-fukutaicho." The stoic captain reminded her coldly, opening the door wider to let her in. "I take it you're here to converse with Abarai?"

"As a matter of fact, I am! But sir, may I ask, why are you two in the office on a Sunday evening? I only knew you were here because someone saw me ringing Abarai's doorbell."

"Abarai has yet again failed to complete his paperwork. I am here to ensure he does so," the noble explained, leading her to an unassuming open door. "Abarai. Matsumoto-fukutaicho wishes to speak to you," he told the redhead blankly, adding as an afterthought, "And paperwork that has failed to be completed today will carry over next week. You are dismissed, Abarai." The Kuchiki head took his leave, closing the door behind him.

"God...the pile seems to grow and grow the more I stare at it," Abarai wearily told no one in particular.

"Tell me about it." Matsumoto sympathised, plonking herself down on the single couch in the room.

"What are you even doing here, Rangiku-san?" he asked, swivelling in his chair to look her in the eye.

"It's about the drinking party," Matsumoto started.

"No luck? Never mind, we can ask Ikkaku and Yumichika to—"

"No, I actually got him to agree," Matsumoto informed him.

Renji proceeded to choke on his own breath. "You..._what_?" he managed after a while of violent choking.

"I got him to agree. But he said we're only allowed one bottle of sake each, and that he has to come along to make sure we don't make nuisances of ourselves."

"That's it?" Renji asked disbelievingly.

"Seems like it. Oh, and he's got me doing paperwork for a month," she remembered dismally.

"...Ouch. But it's still not that bad. That guy must really like you to let you do something like this," Abarai mused.

"Huh? Are you kidding? Taicho hates me!"

The redhead looked at her pityingly. "Wow. It must be really hard being so oblivious."

"What are you talking about?" Rangiku demanded hotly.

"The kid adores you, it's as obvious as his hair."

"...Like you can talk. And taicho doesn't adore me. Sure, he might not _hate_ me, but there's no 'adoration' anywhere in the equation."

"Like I said, it must be really hard for you."

"Shut up. Taicho says you have to be in the barracks by seven. No excuses. Tell Madarame and Yumichika, I'll whip round to the Third and make sure Izuru knows." Matsumoto organised effectively.

"What about Kyoraku-taicho?"

"He probably knows everything already. Whenever sake's in the air, that man seems to know all that's going on."

"True..."

"Well then, I'd better get going. See ya, Abarai!" Matsumoto got up from her position on the sofa.

"Later, Rangiku-san,"

...

When Matsumoto entered the Tenth Division barracks with Kira and Shuuhei (who'd just happened to be there), Renji, Ikkaku, Yumichika and, sure enough, Kyoraku were already sitting around the kotatsu* with their designated bottles in front of them.

"Ah, Rangiku-san! So nice to see you could make it!" Shunsui called from his place, smiling widely.

"...This_ is_ my party, Kyoraku-taicho."

"Details, details," Shunsui waved her off, "Come on you three, take a seat! Where's Hitsugaya-kun?"

"Dunno. Might still be with Hinamori," Rangiku theorised, seating herself at the kotatsu next to Kira.

"It would be a bit of a fail for him to be late, seeing as he was the one who specified the time we all had to be here." Shuuhei piped up from the opposite side of the low table, grinning slightly.

"Well I'm sure you'll be happy to discover that I am, in fact, on time, Hisagi-fukutaicho." Hitsugaya's icy tone made them all flinch, except for Kyoraku.

"Uh...yeah. Ecstatic," Hisagi stuttered awkwardly, turning a dark shade of crimson. Kira smiled at him sympathetically.

"Well, hurry up you lot. I want you all out of here by eleven," the small captain informed them, seating himself in the last remaining place at the kotatsu, between Kyoraku and Renji. Unfortunately for him, the two tall men towered over him, even while slouching.

"Yes, taicho!" Matsumoto said cheerily, uncorking her bottle. "Well, you lot, we may as well get started! Who wants to see me drain this in under a minute?"

"Uh...Matsumoto-san? That'd mean you'd only be drinking sake for less than a minute," Kira politely reminded her of the one-bottle factor of their makeshift drinking party.

"...Oh yeah. Well then, let's see who can make their bottle last the longest, while taking continuous sips!"

"I'll drink to that," Ikkaku raised his bottle.

"I'm so glad you aren't going to gulp it down all at once, Ikkaku. It's so not beautiful," Yumichika cheered while taking a small sip from his own drink.

"...Shut up, Feather Head."

...

"So...why don't we start a game of Twenty Questions?" Shuuhei suggested after they'd all finished their one bottle of sake and were waiting for the after-effects to wear off a bit so they could go home.

"I'm up for it!" Kyoraku enthused, smiling widely. "Who's going to start?"

"I will," said Ikkaku, always up for any sort of challenge, even if it wasn't specifically a challenge. "Uh...Hitsugaya-taicho; what's your favourite type of candy?"

"What?" Toushiro spluttered, taken aback, "I'm taking no part in this!"

"Don't be ridiculous, you're here, aren't you? Now, be a sport and answer the question." Shunsui prodded.

"...Fine. I don't have a favourite type of candy; I do not enjoy sweet things." He informed them all, fixing the unfortunate-but-deserving Madarame with a Death Glare.

"He lies! He lies!" Matsumoto shrieked from her place at the kotatsu, causing Kira to wince and lean away from her slightly. "He likes cookies and ice cream!" she continued slightly quieter, earning herself a Double Death Glare from her captain.

"Cookies and ice cream? That's so sweet," Kyoraku cooed. Hitsugaya didn't bother to glare at him. Obviously it was having no effect.

"It's your turn to ask a question now, taicho!" Matsumoto told him, leaning forward in anticipation.

"Very well," Hitsugaya pondered for a bit, then smirked. "Kira-fukutaicho. Do you do all your paperwork all the time? Matsumoto and I had a disagreement about it earlier."

"Huh?" The blond was evidently confused. "Well...yeah, usually, I guess," he 'admitted', jumping slightly at Matsumoto's loud groan.

"That was unfair, taicho! Of course Izuru's going to do his paperwork; his captain's terrifying!" she shamelessly insulted her childhood friend behind his back.

"That may be the case, Matsumoto, but I was still correct." Toushiro smirked at her.

"Anyway...I guess it's my turn, then?" Kira asked, before heading straight into his question before anyone could answer. "Hisagi-san; what is your opinion of Tousen-taicho?"

Hisagi leaned back and contemplated for a bit. "He's pretty cool, I guess, a good guy...but he can get a bit too overexcited about justice and the like,"

"Agreed," said everyone unanimously.

During most of the 'game', Toushiro found himself slightly annoyed at the ridiculous questions that were fired at him.

"Hitsugaya-kun, how tall are you?"

"...Four foot four,"

"Are you over twenty, Hitsugaya-taicho?"

"Yes. I am sixty-seven,"

"No way!"

"What's your favourite food, taicho?"

"Watermelon, Matsumoto. And I'm certain you knew that already."

"...I actually did as well,"

"What kind of woman would you like to have when you're older?"

"The point of that question being...?"

"Just answer it."

"...Uh. Hardworking, I guess," he lied, without quite knowing why.

"What? You think about work way too much, taicho!"

"Why should you care?"

"..."

Needless to say, Hitsugaya was getting rather fed up with all the nonsense. However, after a while, he found he was actually quite interested in most of the answers his fukutaicho offered.

"Rangiku-san, what bra size are you?"

...Okay, maybe not that one.

"Matsumoto-san, what's your favourite colour?"

"Um...I can't choose between silver and blue,"

That was a surprise; he'd been sure she'd say pink.

"And how about your favourite things to do?"

"Sleep, drink, chat and have fun!"

That one was predictable enough.

"Rangiku; what do you like in guy?" The questions were getting steadily more personal.

"I like...cute guys! That blush all the time,"

Cute? Really?

"So, Rangiku-san," It was back to Kyoraku, who had asked about her bra size last time. Maybe he should be ready to intervene at any point. "How many men have you slept with?"

"Right, that's it! Time for everyone to go now!" Hitsugaya jumped up, disturbing most of the sake bottles and causing them to roll onto the floor.

"What? No fair, Rangiku-san hasn't answered her question yet," Kyoraku complained, holding onto the side of the kotatsu to prevent it from overturning.

"Too bad. That one was a _bit_ too far," Hitsugaya retorted acidly.

"It's fine, taicho! I don't mind, and it wouldn't be fair for me to get out of answering an embarrassing question when everyone else had to. I actually haven't slept with anyone, Kyoraku-taicho," she informed the man.

There was silence.

_What? _Hitsugaya thought.

"What?" Abarai voiced his inner surprise.

"I haven't slept with anyone!" Matsumoto said proudly. "Managed to ward _all_ of them off!"

"...That's a pretty impressive feat, Rangiku-san." Shuuhei said, awed.

"I know right!"

And it seemed that was the end of that conversation. What an anti-climatic end to such a shell-shocking revelation.

Although, when he thought about it, Hitsugaya wasn't actually certain as to why he had been so certain that Matsumoto had at least slept with _one _person. He supposed it was because of her...assets.

Toushiro sighed. It seemed he was guilty of stereotyping as well.

"You're surprised I'm still a virgin, aren't you, taicho?" Matsumoto snapped him out of his reverie as they were walking back to her house.

"Well...yeah," he admitted, turning a slight pink at the awkward (to say the least) conversation topic.

"Don't be ashamed; I'd be surprised too, if I were you." She smiled at him. "So what about you, taicho? Are you a virgin?"

"What?" he spluttered, inadvertently tripping over his own feet in surprise, "Of course I am!"

"I don't see what the 'of course' is for, taicho. You may look like a kid,"-glare- "...but you sure as hell aren't. Although I am glad you are," she told him, "Makes you that much cuter. Also, they say virgins blush so much more than other people!"

Hitsugaya rewarded her unconsciously when he promptly turned a stunning scarlet.

She really did love it when her cute taicho blushed.

...

*Kotatsu: A low table covered with thick material that is heated from underneath. The common pose for sitting at one of these would be kneeling, although other positions can be used.

**A/N: Pretty decent length, huh? As I said, I really like this one, because there are SUBTLE hints about Mastumoto and Hitsugaya's growing relationship, as opposed to my normal drop-a-ten-tonne-weight-on-your-noggin hints. Wait, were they even subtle? Or did you guys even get them? I remember the last time I tried to subtly hint at something...did NOT work out. XD**

**Like it? Cool, review! Not like it? Cool, review, but do it politely and tell me how to improve, please! Hate it and feel like flaming? Go eat some bacon. XP I'm going to be saying that for, like, the rest of my life now. Bacon ftw!**


	14. Birthday

**A/N: WOO! UPDATE! I'll be honest with you lot, I almost forgot about this. I have a crap-load of assessments coming up, but THAT IS NO EXCUSE! Bad tii-chan. *slaps wrist* (Got that from a Death Note fanfic. Not sure which one, but it is AWESOME! If anyone recognizes it, tell me PLEEEAAASSSE!)**

**Anyways, as you can see, I remembered just in the nick of time! Yay me! I really like this one too, but then again, I liked it three hours ago, when it was just one word request in my notebook. From TheSecondQuincy, by the way. It is awesome. THANK YOU SOOO MUCH, YOU MADE MY SATURDAY! I'd forgotten what the next word req was, then I looked it up, and was like, "WOO!" **

**...I'm a bit hyper this evening. Sorry ya'll!**

**Anywayyyyys...GUESS HOW MANY ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS I HAVE! We have another broken record, peoples!**

**Thanks to all of:**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**Vixenlive**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**dragonick711**

**tissawolf**

**lilxdeath13**

**bandgirlz**

**hitsufan**

**deadpoolhulk**

**Da Two Peoples, Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**YinYang94**

**and Destiny Awakened! Woaaahhhh...that a hella lotta people, people! Praise them! Muchly! X3**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite and his awesome manga! Which, if I am correct, is updated again next week. Damn, those few days are gonna go slowly. XD  
><strong>

Birthday

Matsumoto Rangiku was staring rather blankly at the calendar on the wall of her bedroom. Today was the twentieth of December…just a normal Sunday. So why did she feel as if she was missing something?

_Twentieth of December, twentieth of December…_ Rangiku internally muttered, wondering if she repeated them enough, the words would reveal their elusive meaning to her. No such luck.

Matsumoto cried out in frustration before violently poking the small square which had been highlighted with a pink circle.

_What the hell is so special about today? _She was getting increasingly frustrated. _Ah well. I guess if it's that important, it'll come up sooner or later. I just hope it doesn't choose to come to mind tomorrow morning, though…that'd suck. _With that, the Tenth Division Lieutenant bustled out of her bedroom to go wake up her captain with his ritual cup of tea.

…

"Nngh…Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya cracked a teal eye open, gazing at her sleepily before sitting up in bed. He was wearing full-body watermelon pyjamas, which wasn't really surprising, considering the weather had been getting a lot colder recently.

Matsumoto cooed inwardly at her insanely adorable taicho's sleepy face before handing him his favourite mug. Not that he'd told her it was his favourite, but he'd thrown a hissy fit after its identical predecessor had been broken, so she'd just figured it out.

Toushiro smiled slightly at her, taking a sip of the warm liquid. "Lovely, as usual, Matsumoto." he praised.

Matsumoto beamed. Taicho was always so much nicer when he was semi-lucid. "Thank you, taicho! And, uh, do you know what's happening today?"

"No, I don't know what's happening today. What's happening, Matsumoto?" he inquired, only slightly sarcastically, leaning back into his pillow.

"I was hoping you could tell me. I circled today on my calendar, and for the life of me, I can't remember why." she admitted, the mild irritation of the elusive memory coming back to her.

"…Oh. Well, I don't know why you circled today. Maybe you should think about it. Did you make any preparations beforehand?" he asked, for no apparent reason.

"No. If I had, I'd probably know what was going on. I hate it when I can't remember stuff like this!" she groaned, making to exit the room. As she reached the doorway, she turned around again, eyeing him suspiciously. "Taicho, are you _sure_ you don't know what's happening today?"

"Very sure, Matsumoto," he answered easily, his act only flawed by the slight tensing of his jaw. Poor guy, he probably had no idea how much attention she paid him and his incredible schmozzle*.

"…Right. Well, I guess I'll be seeing you around then, taicho. I'm gonna go see Kira. He's good at remembering stuff. You doing anything?"

"Nah. I'll probably read something," he said lazily, getting out of bed and putting his empty mug on the bedside table. "See you later, Matsumoto. I'm going to get changed now,"

"Cool," she said distractedly, still staring at him.

"…Matsumoto? That was a cue for you to get out." he deadpanned, giving her a small scowl.

"Hm? Oh, right! Sorry, taicho!" she hurriedly rushed out of the room.

Toushiro rolled his eyes, and sighed. It figured she'd forget.

…

"Hey, Izuru, can I ask you something?" Matsumoto called up to the blond man's bedroom window.

"Huh? Matsumoto-san? What are you doing here?" the Lieutenant replied, sticking his head out of said window.

"I said I wanted to ask you something!" she repeated.

"Oh. Alright then, come on in," he granted her permission, withdrawing his head and shoulders.

Matsumoto tried the door, found it unlocked, and walked inside. "How are you, anyway?" she inquired, smiling at the blonde shinigami.

"Yeah, okay, I guess. You?"

"I dunno. I know something's happening today; I even circled the date on my calendar. But I don't know what the hell it is!" she wailed, throwing her hands into the air dramatically.

"Calm down Matsumoto-san! Are you sure you can't remember anything?" Izuru asked, pushing on her shoulders to get her to sit down in a chair.

"No…just that it was really important," she moaned, pouting.

"Right. Well, if you can't remember it, it can't have been that important, can it?" Kira reasoned, smiling encouragingly.

"Yeah it could! My memory's like a sieve! Unless I've been drinking, which is really weird…" she mused, frowning.

"…Uh huh. In that case, it'll come to you eventually. Or someone'll remind you," he continued in his rather failed attempt at calming her down.

"Oh yeah, that reminds me! I think taicho knows something about it," Rangiku remembered, pointing her finger up in the air. You could practically _see_ the light bulb pinging on above her head.

"How did you conclude _that_?" the blond asked disbelievingly. The small captain's poker face was nearly as expert as his own superior's.

"I can read him pretty well. He looked slightly uncomfortable when I brought it up." she explained.

"I see. And did you ask him about it?"

"Yeah. He said he didn't know anything though. But he was lying." Matsumoto was certain on that fact.

"…Right. He probably wants you to figure it out yourself, then. It might be important to him or something." Kira theorized, looking at the whole scenario from a logical perspective.

"You might just be right! Wow, Izuru, you're really good at this! How'd you learn?"

"Ichimaru-taicho gets all het up like this sometimes, although he shows it in a…different manner to yourself. Eventually, you learn how to think in situations like these," Izuru told her, his expression mildly horrified as he recalled his captain's 'episodes'.

"Oh my God. Poor you, having to deal with his shit. I thought he'd grown out of that ridiculous crap!" Matsumoto sighed. "Tell you what, seeing as you've been so helpful just now, I'll talk to him about it sometime, get him to grow up and stop harassing you, okay?" Rangiku smiled cheerily, pleased with her idea.

"Uh…Matsumoto-san, I think you may have got the wrong idea. He doesn't _harass _me, per se, but he does get slightly…clingy," Kira blanched, though he didn't actually look particularly disgusted.

Rangiku smirked. "Oh, _that_, huh? Well. I'll let you deal with that your own way, then. You don't seem _too _desperate for my help, after all," she grinned wickedly at the poor blond, who blushed a dark red.

"M-Matsumoto-san, I think you're getting the wrong idea…" he stuttered, profusely flustered at this point.

"Sure." She didn't believe him. "Well, I'll be off then. I'm going to talk to Hinamori. _She'll _probably know what's going on today, if it has anything to do with 'Shiro-chan'." she wrinkled her nose. It may not have appeared that way, but all close friends of Rangiku's knew she hated the daft nickname as much as the unfortunate bearer of it.

"Okay," Izuru agreed quickly, not entirely sorry to see her go. It wasn't that he didn't like Matsumoto-san; quite the opposite, really, she was a wonderful friend, but sometimes she could be a bit too much like her childhood friend for his liking.

…

"Rangiku-san! What can I do for you today?" the brunette asked happily, beaming at the sight of her fellow Lieutenant.

"Hinamori-chan, do you know what's special about today?" Rangiku got straight to the point.

"Today? It's the twentieth, right?" Rangiku nodded her affirmation. "Oh, Rangiku-san…it's Shiro-chan's birthday today," she told her worriedly, only getting more anxious when she saw horror flash across the woman's face.

"Bugger…" she choked. "He's gonna be _pissed_." And with that, she shunpoed off in the direction of her house, leaving a more-than-slightly-distressed Hinamori in her wake.

…

"Taicho!" Matsumoto called, bursting through the front door.

Hitsugaya looked up from his book. "Yes, Matsumoto?"

"I'm so sorry! It just completely slipped my mind! I do stuff like this all the time! I'm so stupid! Please forgive me! I'm sorry!" Matsumoto yelled, bowing to her captain numerous amounts of times before biting her lip, looking like she was about to cry.

"Uh…Matsumoto? I take it you've finally remembered the significance of today, then?"—Nod—"Well, you should know I don't particularly mind if you forgot. I can't expect you to remember every tiny date in the year, now can I?"

"But this isn't tiny! This is huge! You're…what, nearly seventy now? Either way, I can't believe I forgot! I'll get you a card and present tomorrow, I swear!" she promised fervently, still trying to make up for her blunder.

"There's no need, Matsumoto, calm down. I've already got numerous ridiculous bits of tat from Hinamori today," he gestured to a heap of cookies and cute toys piled in the corner.

"But _still_! I wanna give you something too, taicho!" Matsumoto wailed, really not calming down.

"And _I_ don't want you to spend any money on me at all, Matsumoto. That's an order. I know you're a bit strapped for cash at the moment, even if it is you and your alcohol addiction's fault." Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow.

"But—but—can I get you a present that I don't spend any money on?" Rangiku asked.

"Sure, go ahead. But don't spend ages trying to beg, borrow or steal something of random strangers. Or making anything, for that matter." Hitsugaya advised, closing his book after dog-earing the page he was on.

"What? How am I supposed to give you anything, then?" Matsumoto asked, perplexed.

"I don't know, now do I? I don't even particularly want a present, anyway." Hitsugaya shrugged.

"…That's unfair, taicho."

"I don't see how."

"I really, really want to give you something to make up for my forgetting your birthday! To apologise, you know?" Rangiku whined.

"I've already told you there is absolutely nothing you need to apologise for. But if you really want to, I guess you can give me something. But it has to be small, cheap and non-tat-like." he listed his specifications.

"Okay," Matsumoto agreed, surprisingly easily. He'd been sure she'd argue with him to lighten the criteria for at least another ten minutes.

Toushiro shifted uncomfortably under the fixed gaze of his fukutaicho, who was studying him intensely, in order to figure out what she was to give him, he supposed.

"Alright! I've got an idea!" she cheered, walking up to him. "Close your eyes, taicho," she instructed, smiling excitedly.

"…You've got it here with you…now?" he inquired suspiciously, wondering what it could possibly be.

"Yup," she affirmed chirpily, only making him that much more concerned.

"Will I like it?" he hazarded, slightly apprehensive of the answer.

"Maybe. I really don't know. But it'd be a bit of a fail of a present if you didn't." Matsumoto reasoned.

"True. Then again, I didn't really like any of Hinamori's gifts, and I'm pretty sure they count as perfectly ordinary presents."

"Yeah, well, I can promise you my present won't be anything like Hinamori's, taicho." she assured him, smiling. "Now close your eyes," she repeated her instruction.

He obeyed, although hesitantly. He concentrated instead on the rustling sound her clothes made as she moved to his level.

"Matsumoto, what are you—" he broke off with a gasp as he felt something warm, soft, and extremely pleasant press gently against his cheek, right next to his mouth.

His eyes flew open in shock as his Lieutenant drew back, grinning at him fondly as she got up from her previous position of crouching on the floor in front of his chair.

"Well, taicho? What did you think? Like it?" she teased, before laughing and exiting the room, leaving him with his turmoil of thoughts.

Hitsugaya numbly raised a hand to his cheek, not quite believing what had just transpired. The kiss had been unexpected, to say the least.

But it certainly wasn't the worst birthday present he'd ever had.

…

*schmozzle: For those of you who don't know, this is slang for face. I'm not sure what country it originates from, though. Hell, knowing me, I might've even made the damn thing up! But I thought it sounded cute there, so…

**A/N: AND THERE'S THE KISS! Kind of... I'm saving the real one for later...ehehehehehehe...*evil laughter***

**What did you guys think? Oh, and by the way, has the whole scenario ever happened to anyone before? Cos it happened to me once.**

**FRIEND: So...did you remember what today is?**

**ME: Uh...Tuesday?**

**FRIEND: ...Yeah, but remember anything else?**

**ME: Should I?**

**FRIEND: Yes -_-**

**ME: Is it Easter already?**

**FRIEND: NO YOU MORON, IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!**

**ME: O.O ...I knew that! Yeah, your card's in the post, and the present's in the...in the shop. u.u Velly solly.**

**FRIEND: ...**

**Oh dear, huh? I have a memory like Matsumoto's! Except it doesn't improve when I drink. At least, I don't think it does, seeing as I don't drink. XP**


	15. The Shinigami Women's Association

**A/N: HALF TERM IS HERE! I'm on holiday for a week, so updates MIGHT come slightly faster for a bit. Emphasis on the might though, I don't know how busy I'm going to be. I have a mock exam coming up.**

**Anyway! I was going to leave this thing till tomorrow, because I was going to my friend's house to give her her birthday present (wish her happy birthday for yesterday, guys! She'll appreciate it so much!) but she got sick, so I'm going tomorrow instead. So I sacrificed the offer of sledging in a field somewhere (WE HAVE HAD SNOW! FINALLY!) to write this for ya'll. I hope you're grateful. Yes, you. XD**

**Credit for the awesome word request goes to TheSecondQuincy, who always seems to overrun my mind with inspiration. THANK YOUU! X3**

**Who's read the new Bleach manga chapter? 480, by the way. If you have, read this. If you haven't...don't, because there are spoilers.**

***Spoilers from now on, in case you'd forgotten***

**IT'S THE LAST ARC! OMG! *freaks out* It better have a good ending! And who else is confused about what's going on? What was Mayuri talking about? I don't suppose you guys know any more than me...do you? XP**

***Spoilers end...now***

**Right. The number of faves/reviews/etc. In this fic, it would be average. From my previous fics, it'd be ENORMOUS! Thanks to all of you soooo much for actually getting me USED to this insane amount of feedback! You're all amazing peoples!**

**Amazing peoples:**

**icemoonbankai**

**Vixenlive**

**hitsufan**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**Da Two Peoples, i.e. Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinamru Stole My Bacon! (by the way, you two, I'm afraid I can't do Christmas as a word request, as our darling Shiro-chan's birthday is very very close to it, and I always do word requests in order of...well, request. Right now, I have 8 word requests to work my way through, so...I'm sorry, it just wouldn't fit in! Velly solly...sad face. PLEASE FORGIVE ME! *is shot*)  
><strong>

**shil07**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**sagitgirlth**

**mitsuki15**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**MemeLee**

**and TheSecondQuincy! Wait...let me check my inbox to see if I've missed any. That happens to me quite a lot. Nope, no new ones! Phew... XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. Unfortunately. However, when I am a billionaire (in my DREAMS!), I will buy them off Kubo Tite and loan them out to you at request. WHO'S UP FOR IT? XP   
><strong>

The Shinigami Women's Association

"Hey, hey, Nana!"

"What is it, Kusajishi-fukutaicho?" Nanao asked, turning round to see the small, pink-haired girl bouncing around the room behind her.

"I've been thinking…" Yachiru stopped moving to put a finger on her chin.

"Have you now?"

"Yup! And I think Boobies is in love with Shiro-chan!"

Nanao choked on her own breath. "What? Kusajishi-fukutaicho, what are you saying? Rangiku-san has no such feelings!"

Yachiru looked at her as if she was mentally deficient. "Uh…yeah she does. She's always going on about him."

"No, she's not." Nanao insisted.

"Yes she is."

"No, she's—Oh, have it your own way. I'm having nothing to do with this," Nanao gave up, exasperated, before flouncing out of the meeting room of the Shinigami Womens' Association. Without turning round, she said, "Just don't hurt either of them, okay, Kusajishi-fukutaicho?"

"I won't! See ya, Nana!"

…

Nanao walked down the winding alleyways of Seireitei, wondering whether she should warn Rangiku about the impending doom with pink hair that was about to unleash itself on her private life. Then she shrugged. Rangiku had dealt with a lot more than this; she could handle a small, pink puffball.

…

"Booooobies?" Yachiru popped her head over Matsumoto's shoulder.

"Yes, Yachiru-chan? What can I do for you?" the woman replied, smiling at her unexpected company.

"The SWA's having a short-notice meeting. You coming?" Yachiru asked innocently.

"Huh? I never heard anything about a meeting." Matsumoto was confused.

"That's why it's called 'short-notice', Boobies."

Hitsugaya snorted. "Out-smarted by a child. Congratulations, Matsumoto," he smirked.

"Don't be mean, taicho. Yachiru-chan's not a kid," Matsumoto scolded him, "But sure, Yachiru-chan, I'll come. When is it?"

"Now,"

"…Is it? Uh…okay then, I'll be right there. Taicho, can I have the rest of the day off?" Matsumoto asked hopefully.

"Sure, you've done quite a lot of work recently. For you, anyway," Hitsugaya surprised them both by saying.

Matsumoto raised both eyebrows. "Oh. Thanks, taicho! You're the best!" She glomped him before exiting the room with the Eleventh's Lieutenant.

…

Matsumoto and Yachiru entered the meeting room of the SWA. It seemed they were the last to arrive, as everybody was already sitting down.

Or maybe not. "Where's Nanao-chan?" Matsumoto asked. The Eighth Division Vice-Captain didn't often take a day off.

"Oh, she's doing Shun-shun's paperwork," Yachiru cheerfully informed her, referring to Nanao's lazy captain.

"Not really a surprise there, I guess. So anyways, what's this all about?" Rangiku asked cheerfully.

Yachiru turned to Nemu. "Lock the doors, please!" she ordered chirpily.

Nemu obeyed in silence.

Matsumoto's grin froze on her face. "Uh...Yachiru-chan? What's going on…?" she asked hesitantly, almost afraid of the answer.

"Please sit in the chair over there, Boobies." Yachiru smiled at her, pointing to a wooden chair in the middle of the room and ignoring her question.

Matsumoto deliberated for a second, then did as she was told. The small girl was known for being horribly bi-polar sometimes.

"Thank you. Now, Boobies, do you swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth?" the pink-haired girl asked seriously, while behind her, Kiyone produced a recording device and pressed the button.

"Huh? Yachiru-chan, what is this?" Matsumoto stalled, quite nervous now.

"Just answer the question. Do you swear to tell the truth and nothing but the truth?" she repeated.

"Um…yeah, sure, but about what?" Rangiku hazarded, a bead of sweat running down her brow. This was getting quite creepy now.

Yachiru ignored her question. "Nem-nem," she addressed Nemu, "You take over now. I'm gonna eat some candy," she announced, making her way to a corner of the room that had an enormous pile of sweets in it.

Nemu advanced on the unfortunate Rangiku, who was still wondering what the hell this was all about.

"Matsumoto-san," she started stoically.

"Y-Yes, Nemu-san?" Rangiku prompted her nervously.

"What is your opinion of Hitsugaya Toushiro?"

"…Huh?" Rangiku was flabbergasted. Really? Was this really all it was? "Well…he's a good captain, a bit strict sometimes…well, most times, but I guess I kinda deserve it. And he's good with hakudo and zanjutsu, but he can't really carry a conversation to save his life, and—"

"Let me rephrase, Matsumoto-san. Do you have feelings for Hitugaya Toushiro?" Nemu corrected herself, seeing that Rangiku could go on for days if need be.

Rangiku's eyes widened considerably, and she clammed up. Then, she suddenly got to her feet and made to exit the room. "I'm sorry, you lot, but this is ridiculous. I have no idea why you lot brought me here, but I have…work to do, so I need to get going." she made her excuses, and walked into the door, forgetting it was locked.

"Shiro-chan gave you the rest of the day off!" Yachiru 'helpfully' reminded her.

"…Shit," Rangiku wrenched the door off its hinges and ran for her life. She was dragged back, literally kicking and screaming, by Nemu and Isane, although they were quite gentle with her.

"This is insanity! Why do you lot even want to know?" she wailed, while Yachiru bound her to the chair with ribbon from the chocolate boxes, tying it with a ceremonious bow.

"Because…we think Shiro-chan likes you!" Yachiru lied sweetly, trying to get her to confess.

Rangiku clammed up for the second time that day. Then, she suddenly burst out laughing.

"Pha-ha-ha! You can't seriously expect me to believe that! Taicho—ha!—actually _liking_ me! That's hilarious!" she choked out between fits of laughter.

"But true!" Kiyone cut in, smiling widely.

Rangiku eventually stopped laughing. "You really think that, guys?" she asked.

"Yup! Why else would we say it, Boobies?" Yachiru grinned at her.

"I dunno. But you're wrong. He doesn't _hate _me, but taicho definitely doesn't like me. Especially not in the way _you_ mean." Rangiku told the small girl.

Yachiru narrowed her eyes. "Are you saying I'm wrong?" she demanded, her reiatsu leaking out considerably.

Rangiku quickly backtracked. "Oh, no! I was just saying I think you misunderstood taicho's character! He's a very complicated person, you see." she explained.

"How so?" Nemu asked, trying and failing to look curious.

"Well, he always looks pissed off at something, but the only time when he's _really_ pissed off is when his face goes completely blank and he acts calm. Then you're in for it. And when he's happy, he'll get even _more_ sarcastic than he normally is, and he'll take the mick out of you and deny everything when you press the charges. And when he doesn't like someone, he avoids them like the plague. I mean it, I actually saw him climbing up a tree to prevent Mayuri from seeing him. No offense, Nemu-san." she added hastily.

"None taken," the blank-faced girl replied, "Please continue."

"Oh, right. Uh…so he avoids people he doesn't like, but the people he _does_ like he teases quite a bit, but he's really overprotective of them and gets super-mad at anyone who hurts them. Like he is with Hinamori-chan!" she finished, proud of her apparent knowledge of her taicho's character.

"And with you, Matsumoto-san." Nemu reminded her.

Matsumoto was quiet. Then, "Oh, my God."

"Yay! Boobies believes us!" Yachiru cheered, quickly making up her mind to believe what she thought was a lie when she first came up with it, "Shiro-chan loves Boobies!"

"What? No, no, Yachiru-chan, I don't believe _that_!" Matsumoto protested, inconspicuously loosening the ribbon tied around her torso. "I just realised he likes me, that's all. As a _friend_." she enunciated carefully.

"But what about you, Matsumoto-san? Do you only see him as a friend?" Isane asked softly.

"Well…yeah. I mean, sure he's really cute and stuff, but he's sarky and melodramatic and—oh, stuff it. I don't really know myself. Maybe, maybe not," Matsumoto circled around the question, finally succeeding in undoing the bow.

"Do you dream about him?" Kiyone asked expectantly, leaning forward in her eagerness.

"Uh…" Matsumoto stalled, not really listening. She was much too occupied with surreptitiously escaping from the ribbon. "No, I don't dream about him," she finally answered. "And, sorry guys, but that's all you're getting out of me. I'm outta here," she announced, struggling free of the ribbon and rushing through the doorway.

The large majority of the SWA stared blankly after her. Finally, Yachiru said, "Maybe we should try Shiro-chan next. We'd have to steal his sword, though,"

The rest of the women nodded in agreement.

**A/N: Sort of an average length there...was it okay? It's not my favourite, (that one's still DVD!) but I still like it. Even though Shiro-chan only got two lines...but he can't steal all the screen-time, right? I love him too much, so I tried to supress the need for Toushiro to be there every single second. 'Twas painful. But...yeah. Did you lot like it, at least? Please tell me! In a review...! With this chapter, I'm going to hit 150 reviews! Yayay! I wonder if it's possible to make it to 200...? XD**


	16. Ethereal

**A/N: Here's the early update! Not very early, I'll grant you that, but early nonetheless! I have been so busy this week, never mind that it's supposed to be a holiday! I went home sick before the last two periods last Friday, so I didn't hear that we're going to be starting our English Controlled Assessment next Tuesday and I needed to do an essay plan on aspects of contrast in Macbeth and Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. So, I found out on Wednesday, completely flipped, and only just finished the plan now! I haven't got one of the sheet things that I can take into the exam, but...I'll get it on Monday. I don't want to go back to school! Lie-ins are Heaven! DX**

**Anyway! As you may have noticed, I have put a dictionary definition for the title of this chapter underneath the heading. This is because Keiren-Kun89 (the requester for the next...six chapters!) has a much larger vocabulary than myself, and therefore, I had to look up most of the words requested. Just in case some of you don't know them either, I thought I'd put a lil' definition there! X3 And don't get me wrong, I'm not irritated I had to look them up, I love expanding my (limited) vocabulary!  
><strong>

**And, apologies to Ice Prince Hitsugaya and TheSecondQuincy, but there was a mix-up with the word requests last chapter, and it was in fact the former who requested that word! Sorry, and to make up for my blunder, I'll be sure to use your plot line and title suggestion in a later chapter! Sorry again. u.u**

**Awesome response to last chapter, here are the reviewers/favouriters/alerters/_are_ there any more 'ers'?:**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**sagitgirlth**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**bluedot**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**btalover**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya (SORRY AGAIN!)**

**Vixenlive**

**TheSecondQuincy (SORRY TO YOU TOO! O.O)**

**bandgirlz (thanks for the cool discussion of Bleach! Even though it technically wasn't a discussion...and I thought it was the Quincies too! ^w^)**

**The. Evil. Squirrel**

**CodenameOokami**

**CrazyTomboy679**

**and dragonballzlover2499! Whew, that was a lot! XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite, as per usual. XP  
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Ethereal

_Ethereal: (adjective) __1. light, airy, or tenuous: 'an ethereal world created through the poetic imagination'.  
>2. extremely delicate or refined: 'ethereal beauty'.<br>3. heavenly or celestial:' gone to his ethereal home'._

Matsumoto was in a singing mood. She'd woken up with a cheery song from the Living World permanently on replay inside her head, and greeted it with open arms. The song had a beautiful tune, even if it was in English.

Now she sang it from pure memory at medium volume in the shower; she would have been louder, but that'd have meant waking up her taicho, who was less than tolerant of her antics early in the morning.

Humming the bridge that she could never quite remember, Matsumoto leaned her head back against the cool tile wall of her shower, letting the borderline-scalding water cascade down on her like tiny, high-velocity needles. Just how she liked it.

It was a public holiday today; she couldn't remember what occasion had happened sometime, long ago, on this very day. Probably some new Freedom Act passed by the Central 46 or whatever. To be frank, she didn't really care. A whole day with her taicho! Matsumoto couldn't help but crack a rather evil-looking grin at that thought. He was so adorable; it was impossible to resist the temptation to annoy him.

…

"Uh…President? Is there any particular reason why you've called yet another short-notice meeting of the SWA today?" Nanao nervously asked the Lieutenant of the Eleventh, more than slightly apprehensive of the answer.

"Yup!" came the cheery answer through a mouthful of half-melted chocolate.

Nanao winced at the sight. "And what would it be?" she prompted.

"To figure out how to make Shiro-chan say he loves Boobies!"

Nanao rolled her eyes. "This again? No disrespect intended, Lieutenant, but aren't you taking this a bit too seriously? I mean, isn't it their business?"

"No. What gave you that idea?" Yachiru looked as perplexed as a child her age could.

Nanao sighed and gave up. There was no dissuading the President when she was like this. "Fine, whatever. But I'll say it again; I'll have nothing to do with this. You'll only end up hurting the two of them and pushing them further apart than they were before." With those words of warning, Nanao gracefully exited the meeting room.

Yachiru dropped her chocolate, its appeal suddenly lost to her. Why did Glasses-chan have to be so miserable? She wasn't doing any harm…was she? Now she felt guilty, and she hadn't even done anything yet.

Yachiru pouted and thought hard. Yes, she could hurt Shiro-chan and Boobies if she went too far, but if she was careful, they could grow closer instead. That was simple enough; the real problem lay in what constituted 'too far'.

The session with Boobies probably counted as _way_ across the line. Lucky the blonde hadn't taken it too seriously. Maybe she'd thought they were all high on candy.

Oh well. Shiro-chan was more temperamental than Boobies anyway. They would have to be careful whatever the situation.

Coming to a decision, Yachiru turned to face the gathered hoards of the Shinigami Women's Association.

"Right you lot. We're gonna need to think about this one!"

…

Hitsugaya was aroused rather rudely by an ear-splitting din coming from the living room. Groggily, he sat up, rubbed the sleep from his eyes and blearily pulled on whatever clothes were nearest. Thankfully, they were male clothes, unlike that one time where Matsumoto had got confused with the washing…

Shaking the unwelcome memory from his mind, the young captain trudged into the living room to see what was making that terrible noise.

He was only slightly surprised when he found it was Matsumoto, watching the television, ironing, and doing what may have been called 'singing' if done by any other person, but certainly didn't qualify from her mouth. It was out of tune, the tempo was all over the place, and it was ridiculously loud.

"Matsumoto. Please refrain from making that infernal racket." Hitsugaya 'requested', plonking himself down on the sofa and eyeing his fukutaicho with a calculating frown.

Matsumoto obeyed, for once. For a few seconds, there was a blissful silence.

Until the blonde opened her big, fat gob, that is.

"Taiiiichoooo! You're so mean, coming in here and saying I was making an infernal racket when I was trying especially hard to be quiet _just for you_ so you wouldn't wake up, and then you have the cheek to freakin' wake up anyway and come and _tell me off_, of all things, for my efforts! And it's a very nice tune, and you should be glad I'm granting you with the opportunity to hear it, seeing as you don't pay me enough for me to be able to buy a CD player to play the songs properly, and—"

"Matsumoto." That was the final straw.

"Yes, taicho?"

"I pay you perfectly adequately. Your tendency to spend your paycheck on alcohol, however, is _not_ my problem." he informed her hotly, taking the effort to add, "And you were not being at all quiet, and it was physically impossible to decipher a tune from all the bawling."

"…That is so mean, taicho." Matsumoto informed him, though she didn't look particularly upset. She knew perfectly well she couldn't carry a tune to save her life. However, she couldn't let an opportunity to annoy her captain just pass by like that. "If you're so well-versed in what makes a good singer and what doesn't, hows about you show me _your_ singing voice?" she challenged.

Hitsugaya snorted. "As if! I'm not making deals with you, Matsumoto. Past experience tells me it never ends well."

"What? It _so_ does!"

"Let me rephrase that. It never ends well _for me_."

"…True, that," Matsumoto smirked, recalling all the past times her taicho had fallen hook, line and sinker for her proverbial bait. Still, worth a try. "Is it because you're too scared, taicho?" she poked mercilessly at his well-protected ego.

"…Oh no, Matsumoto. That is _not_ going to work on me. Try something better." Hitsugaya said smugly, sure she wouldn't be able to get him to do what she wanted.

"Okay, give me a sec," Matsumoto alarmed him by saying, causing him to watch, wide-eyed, as she disappeared into the kitchen. What kind of evil instrument of torture did she keep in the snack cupboard _now_?

"Okay!" Matsumoto returned, holding something big and obviously not light behind her back.

Hitsugaya regarded her suspiciously. "What is that?"

Matsumoto produced an absolutely enormous watermelon. "I'll give you this if you sing for me! De-pipped and everything!" she bribed shamelessly.

Hitsugaya's eyes bugged out of his head. That was the hugest watermelon he'd seen in his entire life. How long had she been storing that thing for an opportunity like this? Actually, on second thoughts, he didn't want to know…

It looked absolutely delicious, that was for sure. He could practically smell the fresh, sweet scent coming off it.

Hitsugaya debated for a second.

How bad could singing a few notes be?

"Okay, Matsumoto, you win. I'll sing for you. Now give me the watermelon!" he demanded, grabbing at it.

His fukutaicho expertly held it out of his reach. She loved it when her captain regressed to the child he looked like from time to time. "Nuh-uh-uh, taicho! Singing first, watermelon after."

"…Damn you, Matsumoto." Hitsugaya glared at her, before slumping down onto the sofa again. "Fine, though. What am I singing?" he asked.

"Uh…whatever. I don't mind. You can sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star for all I care."

"Be careful what you wish for, Matsumoto, I might just take you up on your offer," her captain smirked, before closing his eyes to avoid the avid stare of his Lieutenant and taking a deep breath.

The first reaction Matsumoto had to her taicho's singing was, _Thank God. It's not a stupid nursery rhyme._

Then, she froze, both physically and mentally as the true quality of Hitsugaya's voice hit her. It was…beautiful, for lack of a better word. Almost other-worldly. She didn't recognize the song, it was in English too, and that wasn't exactly her best language. But the song didn't really matter; not when her taicho's voice could make Baa Baa Black Sheep sound ethereal.

Too soon, it was over, and Matsumoto closed her eyes to keep the gorgeous feeling of serenity that had come over her while her captain had been singing. The remaining strains of his voice carried her to a far away land, with sunshine and fluffy white clouds a-plenty.

…

"Matsumoto?" Hitsugaya tried, poking his snoozing Lieutenant lightly. At the lack of reaction from her, he shrugged and stole the watermelon from her slackened grip. He'd have to try singing to her more often; the skill of making Matsumoto fall from complete hyperactivity to a deep slumber was not one to be wasted.

**A/N: ...Lol. Matsumoto can't sing. Which is a big opposite to what was in Busking (other fic, GinRan...yeah), but...it was necessary! ****I liked this one. 'Twas funny. I was debating whether to actually make Shiro-chan sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, but then thought better of it because you'd all kill me. X| (stupid dead face)  
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**If any of you are interested, the song I had in my head while writing Matsumoto's musical shower time was Less Than Perfect by Pink. It could have been what was in her head as well, could have not. You take it how you will! **

**Also, I've decided that I'm going to do one of my other little sagas, like the Living World shopping trip, with the SWA's evil plot! So, unless I forget, every chapter up until the Big Event (when they go into action) will have a little bit in it when we see what they're planning. How do y'all feel about that lil' idea? Though it doesn't really matter, because I'll probabaly do it anyway! XP**


	17. Superfluous

**A/N: WOO! Quick update! Yayay! I dunno why I suddenly decided to write this...probably because the new Kuroshitsuji chapter finally came out and I was too busy killing myself laughing to do much else. (Easter specials RULE!)**

**Anywayyy...this one is slightly insane. But I like it. A lot. For reasons later to be unveiled to you. Ehehehehehe... *evil laughter***

**Credit for this word request goes to Keiren-Kun89! And the dictionary definition's right underneath the title, just in case you were wondering.. XP**

**Awesome (and speedy speedy) response to the last chapter - I take it you lot liked it, then? Well, just so ya know, this one's pretty similar, but a lot more crackish. Because I'm insane. *Does creepy fixed-grin-and-starey-eyes type face***

**People to thank:**

**Jing-yen**

**Vixenlive**

**hitsufan**

**sagitgirlth**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Super-Awesome-Poptart-Ninja (Luvin' the pen name, by the way!)**

**ChieLuvsBleach  
><strong>

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon (I've read Feel The Beat too! I luvvit...but I ruined Matsumoto's singing rep, didn't I? XD)**

**bandgirlz**

**Maginas**

**ExtremelySlow (LOL! TOUSHIRO GOLLUM! Oh, the mental images... *laughs her head off. Again***

**and lynnkurapika07! See? Isn't that loads of reviews etc for just two days! I'm gonna hit 170 with this chapter! (Not like that's a big marker or anything, I just felt like telling you all. Because I'm insane. Did you know that? *repeats creepy face*)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite The Awesome! Who I adore, for granting that a certain character I love did NOT die! (For once.) Three guesses whoooo, to people who have read the latest Bleach chapter! XP  
><strong>

Superfluous

_Superfluous: being more than is sufficient or required; excessive._

"Taicho?" Matsumoto called, catching the attention of her captain, who was sitting behind his desk in the office, working steadily through a pile of documents that was taller than he was.

"Yes, Matsumoto?" he replied distractedly, fully expecting an unnecessary comment on nail varnish or whatever.

"How's the building of your house going on?"

Well, he sure as hell hadn't been expecting _that_.

"Why?" he turned to look at her suspiciously.

Matsumoto looked affronted. "I'm just asking! It's polite, you know."

"Yes, I know. Sorry for being so untrusting, but you _did_ kind of smash it up." Hitsugaya reminded her humorously. To tell the truth, he didn't really mind it anymore. What was done was done, and he didn't exactly _mind_ living with his Lieutenant. In fact, he—

_Okay, stop that thought right there,_ Hitsugaya commanded himself.

"Yeah…sorry," Matsumoto's sheepish voice brought him back into the present. "But I'm really just curious about how the house is going on. I'm not planning a sabotage mission or anything!"

Hitsugaya snorted. "I can assure you, Matsumoto, the thought never so much as crossed my mind." He grinned at her.

She returned the smile. Her captain had really warmed up since he'd been living with her.

"It's getting on fine, as far as I've heard. They're about to start the roofing, I believe." he told her.

"What? Only the roof?" Matsumoto was amazed.

"Hey, rebuilding a house completely takes a lot of time, you know. Why, is my living with you that bad?" Hitsugaya teased, smirking.

Matsumoto backtracked quickly. "No, no, it's not that! I like living with you!" She completely missed his not-so-unpleasantly-surprised look. "It's just, I know you're not as comfortable in my house as you would be in your own, so I thought you'd want it to be finished really quickly, so I did too, because you're my captain, and I care for you, but only as a captain, I mean, it's not like I—"

"Matsumoto."

"Yeah?" she questioned breathlessly, still slightly panicky.

"You're babbling." he informed her.

"Oh. Right, sorry." she took a deep breath and smiled at him. "I tend to do that quite a lot."

"Tell me something I don't know."

"Okay! I'm pregnant!"

Hitsugaya nodded distractedly. "Really? That's ni—wait, _what?_" he flipped.

Rangiku rolled on the floor with laughter. "Joke, taicho," she pointed to herself. "Virgin, remember?"

Hitsugaya calmed down a bit. "Right. Yeah. Just don't do that again, okay, Matsumoto?"

"I won't! Much," she snickered, delighted with the reaction she'd elicited from her captain.

Hitsugaya shook his head in defeat and stood up. "Come on, Matsumoto." he ordered.

Rangiku looked confused. "Huh? Where're we going?" she asked curiously.

"Home. It's the end of the work day, remember?" He smirked at her.

"Really? Oh! Cool! Um…I didn't do any paperwork, though." she admitted.

Hitsugaya rolled his eyes. "Like I expected anything else," he ribbed, exiting the office with his Lieutenant following close behind.

…

"So, what's it to be President? We've formulated three possible ways to approach this mission, and now all that remains is to choose the one that'll give us the highest chance of success." Kiyone gestured to the blackboard behind her, where the plans and their respective summaries were scrawled.

Yachiru contemplated, looking pensively at each one for about two minutes each before turning to Nemu.

"What do you think, Nem-nem?"

Nemu hesitated only slightly. "I would recommend, if I use my father's preferred train of thought, Plan 3. This would give us maximum chance of success in the factor of the two subjects admitting their feelings for one another."

Yachiru looked at the blackboard again.

_Plan 3:_

_Step 1: Kidnap subjects_

_Step 2: Secure subjects to separate chairs in the same room_

_Step 3: Interrogate subjects about their feelings for one another_

_Step 4: Prompt subjects to make a confession _

_Step 5: If confession is achieved, leave subjects in room together, untied, but guarding doors to prevent escape_

_Step 6: If confession is not achieved, encourage subjects further with thumbscrews until desired result is obtained_

_Step Seven (only in effect after Step 6): Repeat Step 5_

Yachiru blinked. "Uh. Yeah. Isa-Isa, what do you think?" she asked the Fourth Division Lieutenant.

"I'm almost certain Plan 1 would work best, Yachiru-chan. We'd just have to go about it very carefully." the quiet woman voiced her opinion.

Yachiru considered. "Agreed," she finalised.

…

_They were walking through the forest they'd appeared in at the start of their mission to the Living World._

_Hitsugaya looked at Matsumoto's peaceful face, then at the moon, then at their clasped hands._

_A squeeze of hers on his brought Toushiro's eyes to her own._

_Matsumoto smiled down at him. "What are you thinking?" she asked curiously, tilting her head to the side._

"_Nothing much, really. It's a nice evening, isn't it?" he replied nonchalantly, stepping over a small branch that had fallen in their path._

"_Yeah, it is. The moon's lovely tonight." Matsumoto observed, gazing up at the sky._

"_I prefer the stars myself, but, yes, it is."_

_Suddenly, she stopped, their connected arms pulling straight while he walked on before he realised she wasn't in step with him anymore. _

_He looked at her, confused. "Matsumoto? What's wrong?" he asked._

_She grinned at him mischievously. "Oh, nothing. I was just thinking how your hair looked so much prettier than the moon." _

_Hitsugaya could feel himself blushing to his aforementioned hairline. "Don't be silly, Matsumoto." he reprimanded._

_She chuckled lightly. "No, don't _you_ be silly!" she retorted, pulling him closer to her by the hand._

_If possible, he blushed even deeper. "Matsumoto? What are you doing?" he asked, trying to regulate his breathing and his thumping heart at the same time. _

"_Showing you just how silly you are for not seeing what's right in front of you," she breathed into his ear, making him shiver, before kissing the lobe lightly._

"_Ah! Matsumoto! What do you think you're doing?" he almost shouted, panicking that his legs would give out from under him._

"_Shh…" she quieted him, moving her lips to his neck, "Just go with it."_

_Wasn't that the name of the film they had watched all those weeks ago? He couldn't remember, not when the current situation was fuzzing up his brain so effectively he couldn't hold a train of thought for more than a second._

_Hitsugaya gasped as Matsumoto nipped lightly at his jugular before fisting his hands in her hair when she licked the spot to soothe it._

"_Nngh…" he clenched his teeth, hard._

"_Calm down," she told him, "Relax."_

_He obeyed, becoming effectively limp in her arms while her lips travelled up his neck again, brushing over his jaw line a couple of times before hesitating at the corner of his own mouth._

_He felt her smirk against his lips. "Excited, aren't you? How long have you wanted this?"_

_Her lips smothered his own._

Hitsugaya woke up, gasping. He froze in shock when he found himself not in a wood, but in the guest room of Matsumoto's house. His temporary bedroom.

Hitsugaya groaned and let his head fall into his hands as the memories of his dream washed over him. What the hell had he been thinking? He had no business dreaming about…_that_. What was wrong with him? He'd never had anything like this before. Not that he remembered, anyway.

"Dammit," he muttered under his breath, fully aware of how hypersensitive his body currently was, even when the scenario hadn't been real.

"Taicho? Are you alright?" came a voice at his elbow.

"_Gah!_" Hitsugaya screeched, jumping violently and almost falling off the bed in his shock. "_Matsumoto?_" he whispered, aghast, when he saw who was there, in his room, and had quite possibly been there, in his room, while he was having 'The Dream'. "What are you doing here?" he hissed.

"Well, I was about to go to bed when I heard strange noises coming from your room as I walked past the door," she missed the look of mortification that crossed her captain's face, "so I decided to check on you. Were you having a nightmare or something?" she asked worriedly.

"Or something," he told her, running a hand through his hair.

Matsumoto looked at him curiously. "What was it then? A wet—"

He held up his hand, turning his face away to hide the dark blush on his cheeks. "Stop right there, Matsumoto, and no. Definitely not."

"Whatever you say, taicho." She obviously didn't believe him, but chose to let it go. She could always tease him about it later. "Do you need some tea?" she inquired, getting up from her crouch on his bedside rug.

"Yes, thanks, that'd be welcome." he smiled at her, before pulling on a T-shirt and stepping out of bed.

"All right, then!" she hastened to the kitchen to make him a mug of her special Calm Down Tea, as she liked to call it.

…

Hitsugaya stared in amazement at the creation before him, slowly letting his eye take in the fancy mug, expensive-smelling brew, and neatly-iced cupcake.

"Uh, Matsumoto…?" he started hesitantly.

"Yes, taicho?"

"…Isn't this a bit excessive? I asked for tea, meaning a mug of, but I think you might have misunderstood. And isn't it a bit late for an 'afternoon tea', as the English like to call it, anyway?" he raised an amused eyebrow at her.

"Nah! When's it too late for a cupcake? And, before you tell me you don't like sweet things…just eat it." Matsumoto playfully ordered, taking a bite out of her own cupcake.

Hitsugaya smiled slightly and obeyed.

**A/N: Muahahaha! D'ya see why I liked this chapter so much now? Hitsugaya's getting all hot and bothereeeeddd! Woo! **

**...I wish I had someone to give me tea and a cupcake when I wake up in the middle of the night. Like a demon butler! Sebastian! Hilarious thing is, that's the name of one of my close relations...Lol. XD See ya next time, and school starts tomorrow, (NO!) so it'll probably be back to around-weekly updates again!**


	18. Poignant

**A/N: Hey, all! Here's another update for you! Not particularly fond of this one, I'm having a bunch of Writers' Block, but to make it up to you, I tried to make it as humourous as possible. Yes, it's silly. Yes, it's not very long. But it _does_ have a very important bit in the middle: The SWA is plotting still! Hope you enjoy that bit, if nothing else.**

**Credit for the word request goes to Keiren-Kun89, thank you again for requesting so many words! (And expanding my vocabularly by a LOT)**

**Another lovely big response to the last chapter; you lot are amazing, if you were being paid for every review/fave/etc, I'd...give you a bonus of a million quid! But then I'd be in serious debt, so it's probably a good thing you aren't paid. XD**

**People to thank:**

**QuirkyGirl22**

**Maugan Ra**

**Super-Awesome-Poptart-Ninja**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**TheSecondQuincy**

**Reven 6666**

**ChieLuvsBleach (in answer to your question, Black Butler is AMAZING! In my opinion, of course. I read the manga, which is ongoing, but the anime is in two seasons, both of which are finished. Personally, I'd recommend the manga over the anime, as I know for a fact that it's really good, but if you want to watch it, I'm sure it's brilliant like that as well! The anime doesn't follow the manga after Episode 7, but I know that they're both action-packed and funny! Do you know what it's basically about? If not, I'll be happy to tell you! And I'll try to keep the spoilers to a minimum.)**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**Vixenlive**

**shadow wolf125767**

**sagitgirlth**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Victor Petrenko**

**MiramelRose**

**and angelaumbrello! Woo! So many people... *dies of happiness***

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite, as per usual. Although feel free to tell me if he decides to stick the manga up for auction. XD  
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Poignant

_Poignant: __1. keenly distressing to the feelings: 'poignant regret'  
>2. keen or strong in mental appeal: 'a subject of poignant interest'<br>3. affecting or moving the emotions: 'a poignant scene'  
>4. pungent to the smell: 'poignant cooking odor'<em>

Hitsugaya sniffed the air suspiciously. Yep, there was no doubt about it; Matsumoto was cooking.

He'd be taking a day-long hike then. She should be done replacing the soon-to-be imploded cooker by then, right?

Quietly and oh-so carefully, the young captain crept towards the door that led to freedom. Now all he had to do was avoid that one creaky floorboard. Where was it again…?

_Creak._

Ah. There. Damn it to hell and all.

"Taicho! There you are!" Matsumoto cheered enthusiastically, emerging from the kitchen and scooping him up to cuddle him to within an inch of his life. He just went limp and accepted it. Maybe she was like a wild predator in the rainforests and would leave him alone if he played dead.

Matsumoto started dragging him towards the Maw of Hell, otherwise known as the kitchen door.

Hitsugaya hurriedly decided to resurrect himself. "Matsumoto, I was actually about to go out—"

Matsumoto put on her notorious why-don't-you-like-me face. "But…I was so hoping we could cook together…I planned it all and everything. And it won't be half as fun if you aren't there." she lamented, forlorn.

"I don't see why," Hitsugaya deadpanned, unsympathetic. He had, after all, been at the receiving end of this tactic more times than he'd care to admit. And for some reason, it had always worked.

"Because you make _everything_ more fun, taicho!" she flattered shamelessly. "Come on, please? We can do something really, really simple if you're scared I'll break the kitchen again." she offered. When that didn't work, she switched to bribery. "I'll give you…" She remembered he had no watermelon, "…amanatto?" she tried.

Hitsugaya sighed. She could go on like this for hours. Once again, the why-don't-you-like-me face had prevailed. "Fine, Matsumoto, I'll cook with y—" He didn't get past that point in his sentence before he was smothered in his fukutaicho's ample bosom.

"Yay! Thanks so much, taicho, I love you forever!"She span in circles around the room, stifling a chuckle when she felt his face heat up against her chest at her words. He was just too cute…but he'd probably die if she didn't let him breathe soon.

Matsumoto released him and Hitsugaya spent the next minute or so gasping for breath. When his respiration cycle had been restored, he stood up straight again and strode past his Lieutenant to access the kitchen.

"Let's get this over with," he enthused.

"Okay!" Matsumoto was too elated to care about his lack of good grace.

…

"Okay, you lot! We still need to refine Plan 1! Who's in charge of the bait?" Yachiru asked, cramming yet another sweet into her mouth.

"I am, President." Kiyone stepped forward eagerly, her hands clasped behind her back.

"And what're your ideas?"

"Well, for Rangiku-san, I was thinking another 'meeting', then we wait for a couple of hours for Hitsugaya-taicho to show up looking for her!" Kiyone offered, obviously proud of her lightning bolt of inspiration.

There was a pause while Yachiru chewed the idea over, while ruthlessly masticating a toffee.

Finally, she swallowed the sticky lump, freeing her jaw. "It's a good idea, but I don't think Boobies is gonna fall for another short notice meeting. She's pretty shiny,"

Isane cleared her throat to disguise a small chuckle. "I think the correct term is 'bright', President,"

"Nah it ain't. Bright's boring. So, because Boobies is shiny, we're gonna have to think up something reeeally good to bait her with. How about candy?" the pink-haired girl suggested.

There was a short silence.

"I'm joking, you numpties!" Yachiru relieved them all by saying. "I think we should send her on a fake mission; you know, Hollow Extermination in Rukongai or something. Then, when she doesn't come back for ages, Shiro-chan'll be really worried, and he'll go look for her!" Yachiru stood up in the heat of the moment, sending a wave of candy crashing to the floor.

"But why wouldn't Rangiku-san come back, Kusajishi-fukutaicho?" Nemu asked, probably as perplexed as the rest of the SWA, although no one could really tell.

"There'll be a massive hole!" Yachiru cheered, throwing wrapped sweets around the room.

"…a massive hole, President?" Isane looked worried, for the girl's sanity, if nothing else.

"Yeah! I know it, there's one in a mountain! I remember me and Ken-chan stayed in it for a bit!" Yachiru revealed.

_Ah, so she meant a cave,_ everyone thought.

"And where is this…hole, President?" Kiyone asked.

Yachiru frowned in concentration for a second. Then her face brightened. "I forgot!" she announced cheerfully.

"…Okay. Do you think Zaraki-taicho will remember?"

"Yep!"

Well, that was alright then. The Eleventh's captain would do anything for his small companion.

However, there still remained one problem.

"Uh, Yachiru-chan," Isane started timidly.

The girl turned towards her. "Yeah?"

"How would we get Matsumoto-san to enter the cave, let alone stay in it for hours on end?"

"…" Yachiru thought for a bit. "…Kido," she reluctantly concluded, slightly ashamed at having to use the skill that was the bane of her beloved Ken-chan.

Kiyone started getting excited. "All right then! Now, how about a mysterious light from the depths of the cave, it could be like in those alien movies or something…"

…

Hiysugaya watched in trepidation as Matsumoto stirred a large bowlful of what might have once been eggs, but was now just a sloppy, slimy mess.

"Matsumoto, what exactly are you trying to do?" he asked her.

"I saw it on a cookery show thing. You stir the eggs with one of these weird metal things and they go all fluffy, like…shaving foam." she told him, unsure about her simile.

Hitsugaya was unsure about it too. "…Right. That would be called whisking, Matsumoto, and you can't do it with the yolks in." he informed her.

Matsumoto looked surprised. "Why not?" she asked.

"I don't know, you just can't. So now you've wasted about eight eggs." Hitsugaya deadpanned, not pleased at the outcome of their cooking experiment.

Matsumoto looked affronted. "I haven't wasted them! I'll just make something else!" she told him, abandoning the failed eggs and rummaging in the cupboard. She came out with a couple of armfuls of herbs and spices.

If Hitsugaya was worried before, he was damn well terrified now.

"Matsumoto, what are you talking about? Didn't you have a specific thing in mind when you were making it before?"

"No. Why would I?" The woman was looking at him like _he _was the idiot.

Idiot.

Hitsugaya massaged his temples. "Well, get something in mind now, then. Cooking _is_ specific; you can't just make it up as you go along." he told her uselessly.

She was already chucking all the ingredients she could lay her hands on into the frying pan. It smelled…interesting.

"Okay! I'll make an omlette, then!" she announced.

"What is this 'omlette' going to have in it?" her captain asked, putting emphasis on the subject of the sentence for fear she might actually think he considered this…_thing_ real food.

"…I dunno. Everything!" Matsumoto cheered, going to the fridge to grab the mayonnaise and cucumber.

Hitsugaya took the opportunity to make his hurried escape. Sure, he was fond of Matsumoto, but nothing was worth being forced to actually _eat_ that evil concoction.

**A/N: Hitsugaya avoided food poisoning! Good for him!**

**...Yeah, I know, it's rubbish. No flames please. I have bad days too.**

**I like how the SWA's plan is forming, though. I'm proud of that one. Yachiru's 'hole'...for some reason, that cracked me up.**

**So, taster for next chapter! The SWA pay a visit to Kenpachi...! DA DA DAAAAAAA! (Why am I doing dramatic music?)**


	19. Ephemeral

**A/N: And here's the next update! It's a little bit late...because I forgot. Sorry, there's just no tactful way of putting it! XD**

** I have conjunctivitis. It's not fun. And that's pretty much my entire news update for this week. I'm sure it all enlightened you to the meaning of life. Ie: LIFE HAS NO MEANING. IT IS NOT FUN. Nah, kidding. I'm just screwing with your heads. I'm in a hyper mood today. O.O buzzz**

**Credit for this word request goes to Keiren-Kun89 again! I must say, I hadn't even HEARD of this word before it was suggested! XD And I call myself English...**

**A bit of a disappointing response to the last chapter, I'm not gonna lie. But I'm also not gonna complain! So, all I have to say is this; PLEASE REVIEW, I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER! And ever, and ever, and ever...Like Jesus! (Yes, I am a Catholic. No, I did not choose to be one. No offense to those who did, it's just not really my thing!)**

**Acknowledgements:**

**Jimmy10.0**

**Vixenlive**

**ChieLuvsBleach (for Kuroshitsuji, I would recommend mangareader *dot* net. It's scanlation quality is really good, and the updates are usually on time...and it's FREE!)**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Anki-Shai (you're welcome for the Welcome Back story! I'm so glad you like it... X3)**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**and tsuki no yoru64! Thank you all so much! Luv youuuu...*is creepy***

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite, who is confusing the hell out of me with his manga. First, I thought, huh? Then, Quincy. Then, arrancar. Then...What? German? Those of you who haven't a clue what I'm talking about...don't worry. Neither do I, really. XD  
><strong>

Ephemeral

_Ephemeral: 1. lasting a very short time; short-lived, transitory: the ephemeral joys of childhood  
>2. lasting but one day: an ephemeral flower<em>

Hitsugaya's happy moments had always been short-lived.

Not so today, it seemed.

"Good morning, Matsumoto. How are you?"

Matsumoto froze for a second in surprise. Then, with her back still to her captain, she cracked an overjoyed grin.

_Taicho's in a good mood,_ she sang mentally.

She span round to face him. "I'm good, thanks! How are you? Was your tea alright?" She'd taken to leaving it by his bed in the mornings, rather than giving it to him personally. He'd seemed a lot more uncomfortable around her when he'd just woken up recently. God knew why.

"It was very nice; what was the brand again?" Hitsugaya asked her, making his way to sit on the couch. It was a public holiday today, so they didn't have to work.

_Thank God,_ Matsumoto added in her head. It allowed her to savour one of her taicho's rare pleasant moods without any unwelcome interruptions from the slyly grinning third seat or whoever.

Matsumoto suddenly remembered she'd been asked a question. "Uh…I have no idea. I think it had some foreign name. I'll go check the packet," she bustled into kitchen.

Soon enough, she came back, saying, "It was some kind of non-bitter brew with no caffeine. I dunno how you say the name, though. Roo-ee-boss?"

Hitsugaya frowned slightly, albeit with a smile on his lips. "Here, give me the packet." She obliged. "Rooibos. It means Red Bush."

Matsusmoto's curiosity was peaked. "That'll explain the colour. What language is it?"

"Afrikaans. It originated from Dutch when Holland invaded Southern Africa a while back."

Matsumoto tried and failed to recall the event. "Ah…yes, of course."

"Anyway," Hitsugaya continued, "Seeing as we have the day off today and pretty much everywhere's shut, do you fancy playing a game?" He leaned back, causing his shihakusho to slip, revealing a sliver of pale pectoral.

Matsumoto tried not to stare. "Sure. What kind of game?" She swallowed. What was she even doing? He was good-looking, sure, but not really her type. She was probably having a hormone rush. One of the ones that sent her slavering after anything that was male and mobile. Yep, that had to be it.

"Chess?"

She winced.

"…Or not," Hitsugaya smirked, humouring her. Matsumoto raised an eyebrow. He really was cheerful today, huh? Maybe he'd feel relaxed enough to actually talk about himself. It wasn't often she discovered something about him that she didn't already know. And to be honest, she wanted to know _everything_.

"Why don't you suggest a game, then, Matsumoto?" The captain's voice jerked her back into reality. Why was she spacing out so much?

"Well…the only game I can really play is Strip Poker. And I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want to play that." Matsumoto said, smothering her giggles.

Hitsugaya's eyes glazed over a bit. With horror, she supposed. "Not particularly," he said after a few moments, accompanying it with a half-hearted roll of the eyes.

Matsumoto had to bite her thumb to stop herself from cracking up. "How did I guess? Truth or Dare, then?"

Toushiro considered. Then shrugged. It wasn't like the other option was much better. "Alright then. You go first,"

Matsumoto squealed inwardly with delight. "Yay! Truth or Dare, taicho?"

"Truth." Apparently he was playing safe.

Obviously, they didn't just throw the title of genius around these days.

"…How did you first meet Momo-chan?"

…

"Ken-chan! Ken-chan, open up! I can't reach the handle!" Yachiru called at the top of her voice. Which was very high in the decibel level, as many of the Eleventh (and most of the rest of Seireitei) knew.

Yachiru waited approximately three seconds before jumping violently at the wooden barrier that led to Kenpachi's house, reducing it to tiny splinters.

The SWA looked on worriedly.

"Gah! Dammit, Yachiru, can't you wait the tiniest bit longer when you want someone to get to the door? I was on the other side of the freaking house!" Zaraki Kenpachi announced his presence with an amplitude value almost equal to that of his Lieutenant's.

"But I didn't want to wait any longer, Ken-chan. Waiting's boring." Yachiru told him mournfully, unleashing the dreaded puppy-eyes.

Kenpachi's shoulders visibly drooped as he heaved a defeated sigh. "Yeah, yeah, all right. What are you all doin' here, anyway?" he eyed the SWA members with suspicion.

"We wanna ask you a question!" Yachiru announced excitedly.

Kenpachi raised an eyebrow. "Yeah? What kind of question?"

Yachiru paused dramatically. Then…

"Where's the massive hole, Ken-chan?"

There was a silence. Kiyone started to facepalm, but thought better of it at the last minute.

"…What massive hole, Yachiru?" the Eleventh's captain asked wearily.

"The one in the mountain! Duh."

"…Uh huh." Kenpachi wasn't enlightened.

Isane cleared her throat nervously. "Um, Zaraki-taicho…" she trailed off at the glare she was fixed with.

"Well? What is it? Finish the damn sentence, woman!" His glare intensified.

Isane panicked slightly, but soon got it under control. "Kusajishi-fukutaicho is asking whether you remember the location of a certain cave in Rukongai, Zaraki-taicho. Apparently the two of you stayed in it for a while during your time spent outside Seireitei." she clarified, sighing with relief when Kenpachi's evil eye slid from her, only to fix itself on the sky.

"Oh, that shit hole. Yeah, I remember where it is. Why the hell do you wanna go there again, anyway?" The question was addressed to Yachiru.

"Because of Shiro-chan and Boobies! And what's shit hole, Ken-chan?"

Kenpachi hurriedly smoothed over his mistake. "Uh…nothing. Don't repeat it. And whaddya mean? Why would the midget and his vice captain need a cave?"

"Because then they'll get together and live happily ever after!" Yachiru cheered, careering around on the doorstep.

Kenpachi looked slightly alarmed for a second, then decided it was none of his business and that he didn't get it anyway. "Right. Well, I can give you the sector and directions to it, if ya want." he told his audience, looking fairly eager to get back his peace and quiet time.

"Okay! Thank you, Ken-chan!" Yachiru yelled before racing off.

They all watched her go.

"Anyone want the sector?" Kenpachi asked uninterestedly.

"Uh…sure." Kiyone piped up, causing the captain to retreat back through his demolished doorway and come back out with something scrawled on a bit of paper.

"There," he told them, handing it to the Thirteenth Squad Lieutenant. "And don't come back in a hurry." he added with a manic grin.

The members of the SWA rushed to follow their President.

…

"Dare!" Matsumoto decided to be brave.

Hitsugaya smirked. "Clear out your sake stash." he challenged.

Matsumoto gaped. That was the last time she underestimated her taicho's dare skills.

Slowly, she got to her feet, exited the room and came back with five bottles of sake.

"Do I have to throw it away?" she asked, dreading the reply.

"Of course," her captain told her smugly.

Matusmoto sighed and grouchily did as she was told. She would not lose this game! She was the Dare Queen!

…As of now, at least.

After she came back, she fixed her captain with a potent and accusing stare. "Truth or Dare, taicho?"

"…Dare." Hitsugaya hazarded, not really knowing why he did so. Maybe he was curious to see what she'd come up with.

Matsumoto thought for a long time. What would embarrass him most? She had to get back at him for forcing her to eliminate her sake stash, and the inevitable blush would definitely be something to behold.

Finally, she came to a decision. "Okay. I dare you to give me a kiss."

Hitsugaya froze, his eyes wide.

_What the hell?_ was the only thought that came to his frazzled mind.

"W-what?" he asked her, hoping to have somehow misheard.

"Give me a kiss. Come on, taicho, you aren't gonna chicken out, are you?" she taunted, revelling in her success and the light pink dusting on her captain's cheeks.

She'd definitely win now.

Hitsugaya sucked in a deep breath and got onto his hands and knees, crawling over the floor to where his fukutaicho sat.

Matsumoto looked at him with smug eyes.

…Damn her.

Carefully, and oh-so slowly, he leaned in, catching a whiff of her fresh, flowery scent. He hesitated just when his lips were barely a centimetre from her own, feeling the wave of heat emanating off her.

_What is he waiting for?_ Matsumoto asked irritably, although silently.

Hitsugaya didn't really know himself. Matsumoto's smell was nothing short of mouth-watering, and all he really wanted to do was lean in, and—

"Matsumoto-san, I was just wondering if you—Aah!"

The sudden shriek snapped the two out of their daze, causing them to wrench backwards and fall onto their respective cushions.

Matsumoto sat up again and shifted her eyes to Nanao's shocked face, wondering sheepishly whether the dark-haired girl had missed their proximity.

"S-sorry for the interruption! I was going to ask if…actually, I think I'll just be going now. It wasn't that important anyway." Nanao fought to recover her calm, almost tripping on the hem of her skihakusho as she ran for the door.

"Wait, Nanao-chan, it wasn't—"

_Slam._

"…what it looked like." Matsumoto finished dejectedly, hanging her head in defeat. Why? Why always at the most awkward moments possible…

"Matsumoto?"

Her head snapped up.

Hitsugaya was facing her with averted eyes, a bright red flush gracing his entire head.

Matsumoto had to fight down the urge to grab her camera.

"What is it, taicho?" she prompted gently. It wouldn't do to antagonise him now.

"...Sorry. I just awarded you with a prize awkward moment the next time you see Ise-fukutaicho again, haven't I?"

"Just a bit, but I don't mind! It probably did her good to get the blood going, you know? She can be so cold-blooded at times…" Mastumoto joked, attempting to make him smile. She succeeded. That was good; awkward silences in the office for the next year or so averted. On to the next hare-brained scheme!

Hitsugaya shifted a bit, getting to his feet. "Well, I'd better get going. Hinamori asked me to drop off the book I was reading at her place after I finished it. It's going to be dark soon. Want to come with me?" he suggested, finally mustering the strength to fight down his blush and look her in the eye.

_So cute,_ Matsumoto cooed mentally.

Aloud, she said, "Sure, taicho."

While they were walking, Matsumoto thought pensively. All in all, it had been quite a strange day. A day of rare occurrences, it seemed. Yes, her taicho's happy moments were usually short-lived.

But his affectionate smile was even more transitory.

**A/N: HAHAAA! AN ALMOST KISS! GOT YOU THERE, HUH?**

**Ahem. Sorry about that, that was my evil alter-ego (nicknamed Mistress-chan for a very strange reason known only to my best friend and myself) taking over my mind. Just ignore her! X3**

**I don't know about you lot, but I'm beginning to feel this fic drawing to a close. Not soon, probably. I might even be wrong and it could go on for YEARS and become a hundred-chapter epic! But...yeah. Just in case I do decide to finish it before...May (?), I'll give you a bit of an insight into my train of thought.**

**And, I was going to tell ya'll this next week, but I'll inevitably forget, so...I'm going to Germany on a school exchange from Monday the 12th of March to Tuesday the...whenever the next Tuesday is. So no update that week, unless I can ask my exchange (IN GERMAN!) for the use of her computer/laptop/whatever. And I'll probably have to write it in German if I do, (school policy. It's stupid. They've ruined the whole trip by making us write a diary. IN GERMAN, NO LESS!) which will be strange. And if my German skills stay the same as they are now, (VERY bad) then even German speakers won't be able to understand what I'm going on about! So, just thought I'd forewarn you! See ya! XD**


	20. Malevolent

**A/N: Another update! Yay! I didn't think I'd be able to do this one before I went to Germany, because I have two controlled assessments afterwards that I had to prepare for, AND I had to pack, and go to town to buy deodorant, and...yeah. But I DID manage it, and at a human hour too! *is very, VERY proud* Ya'll better be grateful! XD**

**Credit for this chapter goes to Keiren-Kun89 again, and wait for it...I ACTUALLY KNEW THIS WORD BEFORE IT WAS REQUESTED! It's a miracle. XP**

**Yet another brilliant response to last chapter, thanks to all of you for your loyalty, kindness and I-don't-really-want-to-review-but-I-will-anyway-because-I'm-the-nicest-person-in-the-world-ness! You lot know who you are, but the rest don't, so...**

**Thanks to:**

**Becky Schiffer Plum**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**sagitgirlth**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**Vixenlive**

**Jimmy10.0 (in answer to your review, you're welcome for the SA reference! I'm actually originally South African too, but because of the job market crash, I move around a lot. And also, I could be getting the entirely wrong idea, but I couldn't help but notice you kept addressing me as 'sir'. I am in fact female. Sorry if I got it wrong, but I don't really mind if you did think I was a dude!)**

**paypi**

**franznu**

**harriiiet**

**and SHERLY SHELLY AND YES IM A GUY (Nice pen name there XD)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite the Great. As you all know. X3  
><strong>

Malevolent

_Malevolent: __1. wishing evil or harm to another or others; showing ill will; ill-disposed; malicious: 'His failures made him malevolent toward those who were successful.'  
>2. evil; harmful; injurious: 'a malevolent inclination to destroy the happiness of others.'<br>3. evil or malign in influence._

The gathered members of the SWA sucked in a collective steeling breath.

Today was the day.

…

"_Matsumoto-fukutaicho. There has been report of an unexpected hollow attack in District 21 of the Rukongai. You are required to immediately investigate and reap any hollows found." _The Hell Butterfly boomed out its message before flying away on the breeze.

Matsumoto blinked. Hollow attack? Really? She _liked_ Tuesdays. Her taicho was especially cute at this time of the week!

Okay, maybe he wasn't, but the point still stood.

Matsumoto sighed and got to her feet. "I'd best get going," she told her captain wearily. "May as well get it over and done with."

Hitsugaya nodded distractedly, signing another document. Just as Matsumoto was about to leave the study, he raised his head and said, "Be careful, Matsumoto. There was no information about how powerful these supposed hollows are."

Matsumoto smiled and nodded. She wasn't too worried. At most, all she would need to do was release Haineko. She doubted it would be anything over a Menos Grande, but she'd been surprised before. She could always call for backup.

"See you, taicho!" She blew him a jokey kiss.

When he didn't react, she frowned. Suddenly, the slight pout changed to an evil grin. Silently, she crept towards Hitsugaya, making sure to keep on her toes to avoid unnecessary noise.

When she was right behind him, she quickly leaned down and planted a sloppy smooch on his cheek.

Satisfied with the ensuing yell of surprise and the massive blot of ink on the formerly pristine stack of paperwork, Matsumoto shunpoed from the office, cackling loudly.

…

"What? There isn't even a _trace_ of a hollow here," Matsumoto whined to herself, flash stepping around District 21, looking bored. "I swear, if I've been bullshitted—"

She came to an abrupt halt, pausing in every possible meaning of the word, to make sure she had felt it correctly.

Yep, there it was. A flicker of hollow reiatsu.

Matsumoto veered to the right, where the traces were coming from and set off at top speed.

The sooner she got this over and done with, the sooner she could go home and snicker at her captain's inevitable furious/mortified blush from her previous action that afternoon.

The finishing line of her sprint turned out to be a yawning cavern in the side of a mountain.

Nonplussed, Matsumoto peered inside, trying to avoid stepping in any piles of bat poo or suspicious slime.

Seeing nothing from her current vantage point, Matsumoto wrinkled her nose and stepped gingerly inside, avoiding the huge amounts of cobwebs hanging from the ceiling.

A ridiculously huge spider crawled over her foot, causing her to jump slightly. Then she violently stamped on the not-so-little critter, squishing him into oblivion.

She might not believe in animal cruelty, but she was not in the mood to be messed with right now, and the little bugger had needed to be made an example of in case any other fricking bugs decided to pull the same trick with her.

…What was the point of arachnids, anyway?

Matsumoto crept deeper into the cave, straining her eyes in the gloom to see if there were any rogue hollows hiding around. The results came back negative.

Matsumoto narrowed her eyes; she could still feel the 'hollow' reiatsu, but now she could tell something was off about it. It felt almost artificial.

_I swear, if someone's done this because they're trying to be funny, I'm gonna show them exactly how hilarious a broken nose is,_ Matsumoto thought viciously, turning on her heel and heading back towards daylight.

Just as she was about to enter the streams of sunlight pouring down from the sky, her nose met rather painfully with a barrier of some kind.

Cursing, Matsumoto fell on her behind, landing with a very undignified _Bump_.

Of course, she'd just _had _to be standing right in front of a puddle of rancid-smelling goo.

"Ew…" Matsumoto groaned, quickly retracting her derrière from the nasty sludge.

Then, she experimentally kicked the invisible barrier that had caused her to fall in the first place.

After a few minutes of repeatedly crunching her toes and hopping around swearing, the Lieutenant of the Tenth Division came to the conclusion that she wouldn't be able to get out that way.

"Seems to be some sort of bloody kido," she muttered to herself, feeling along the invisible force field for any sign of a crack or blemish. Inside, she was seething. Whatever bastard had decided that pulling this elaborate prank was a good idea was going to get his more masculine assets ripped off and stuck to his forehead with Sellotape.

Then again, they could be female. Oh, the fun she'd have…

Muttering a much-revised incantation under her breath, (she sure as hell wasn't going to repeat the whole Blowing-Up incident) Matsumoto channeled a fairly large fraction of reiatsu to her hands.

A beam of white light erupted from her palms and headed at a very fast speed towards the mouth of the cave.

After a relatively quiet _Boom_, Matsumoto waved away the dust and dirt that had been disturbed by the miniature explosion and coughed.

She looked through the haze to see if there was any difference.

Well, obviously she wouldn't be able to _see _any.

Cautiously, Matsumoto edged towards the opening. Placing a hand out in front of her, she felt around in the air where she thought she remembered the barrier being.

On encountering nothing, she let out a whoop of victory and ran full-tilt to freedom.

_Smack_.

"_Godammit!_"

It hadn't even budged.

…

"Yay! We did it!" Yachiru announced unnecessarily, bouncing around happily.

"Yes, President. We did," Nemu said stoically, secretly quite proud of herself for creating the successful makeshift hollow reiatsu bait for their trap.

"What do we do now?" Kiyone asked, sticking her hand up in the air.

Yachiru looked at her as if she was ten Smarties short of a box. "We wait. Duhh!"

Kiyone looked appropriately admonished. Yachiru turned away again, satisfied. "Although, waiting is boring. Let's just send another Fluttery Buttery to Shiro-chan saying Boobies got in trouble or something." she amended.

Kiyone looked put out. Isane looked anxious. Nemu looked slightly bored.

And Yachiru looked innocently malevolent.

…If that was even possible.

…

Hitsugaya cursed, jumping to his feet. Dammit, Matsumoto had been sent on a simple extermination mission, and yet she'd still managed to get injured.

Luckily, the Hell Butterfly had said she'd managed to reap all the hollows before collapsing.

…But still.

Hitsugaya shunpoed out of the Tenth's office, more of a blur than small captain.

As he raced towards his destination, determinedly tracking Matsumoto's reiatsu, he muttered under his breath, as was a habit when he was particularly stressed or anxious.

"Damn Matsumoto, always getting into scrapes. Would it kill her to actually listen to me and be careful for once? One of these days, she's going to get herself decapitated, and then where'll I be?" Hitsugaya growled, more out of worriment than anger. Where _would_ he be?

…Good lieutenants were hard to find these days, right?

Finding the end of the trail he'd been following like a bloodhound, Hitsugaya stopped just outside an enormous cave that seemed to take up most of a mountain. How the pile of stone was even supposed to hold itself up, he had no idea.

Scanning the entryway quickly, Hitsugaya noticed some small markings on the dull grey rock.

Stepping closer, he realized it was actually part of a kido spell, one that could only be broken from the outside. That must have annoyed her.

His eyes narrowed. _So it wasn't an actual mission; it was a trap._

Briefly, he debated upon going inside. If it was indeed a trap, then he would probably be imprisoned as well if he went inside. The mastermind of this plan must have had enough brain cells to plan for that.

But he couldn't just _leave_ her.

Coming to a decision, Hitsugaya stepped back a couple of paces, hoping Matsumoto hadn't decided to lie down right next to the mouth of the cave or something.

He muttered a quick incantation, sending a mauve light hovering around the entrance, causing the force field to first become visible, then crack, and finally shatter.

After the debris had cleared, the small captain hurried inside, looking around anxiously for his Lieutenant.

…

Matsumoto's head snapped up when she heard a sound remarkably like shattering glass.

Earlier that afternoon, she'd retreated to a corner of the cavern, where it wasn't so filthy, and sat down to think about what to do.

But, apparently, someone had come to a conclusion before she'd had the chance.

Eager for any form of assistance, Matsumoto jumped up and skipped towards where the sound had come from, which was also, incidentally, the mouth of the cave.

Sure enough, as she stepped into the puddle of light pouring from the entryway, she saw the cause of the sound.

"Taicho!" she called gratefully, running up to him and glomping him vigorously, unintentionally smothering him in the process.

After his protests had died down and Matsumoto had loosened her death grip slightly, the latter let go of her superior officer and allowed them both to stand up again.

"Nice to see you too, Matsumoto." her captain said, brushing himself down.

"Really?"

"No." came the emphatic answer, along with a glint in the eye that informed her that he was, indeed, joking.

"So mean, taicho, so mean." Matsumoto 'grieved', marching towards the door determinedly. "Come on, let's get the freak out of here!" she called enthusiastically.

Hitsugaya wondered vaguely if a self-regenerating kido shield was possible, and if so, whether their captor was skilled enough to perform it. Oh well, Matsumoto's nose was probably bruised enough already. One more wouldn't make much of a difference.

Matsumoto whooped with elation as she stepped outside.

Apparently the spell wasn't possible, then. That led him to wonder exactly what the point of this stupid prank was.

"Come on," he said, cheerfully imperious, tugging on her sleeve gently as he followed her outside. "Let's go back; I'm hungry, and I feel like noodles."

He smiled slightly at her amused laugh. "Okay, okay, taicho! Honestly, you're like an eloquent toddler sometimes!"

His smile vanished.

"Naw, did I hurt your feelings? Poor widdle taich—_Aah!_" Matsumoto shrieked as she was shoved into a nearby hedge.

Smirking happily, Hitsugaya flash stepped away to avoid the wrath of his Lieutenant when she extracted herself from the bush and discovered the various cobwebs, slime, bat faeces and now leaves in her hair.

Life was good.

But he'd have to remember to file a complaint about their annoying, if failed, 'abduction'. Maybe an investigation would be organised and he could personally beat the crap out of the idiot who'd thought a half-assed prank would be a good use of his afternoon.

Yep, life was definitely good.

…

"What? They got out?" Yachiru asked, surprised.

"Well, President, you did refuse to plan how we were going to trap Hitsugaya-taicho in there as well once he broke in. I believe your exact words were, 'planning's pointless and boring.'" Kiyone said, not even a tiny bit smugly. She liked the pink-haired girl, but she could be a bit annoying at times.

Yachiru scowled. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'm gonna go play with Ken-chan."

She sped off, already wondering whether it would be wise to attempt another escapade. Even if this one had failed slightly.

**A/N: Haha, what an anti-climax. All that build-up to a supposedly awesome chapter where there's heartfelt confessions and maybe a makeout session in a cave, and you get...this.**

**All I can say is, did you really think I'm sane enough to actually do stuff the way people expect me to? I even suprised MYSELF with this chappie! XD**

**So, if you missed it last chapter, I probably won't be able to update next week, as I will in fact be in GERMANY! Running my ass off doing everything at the same time, in case you were wondering! I have to get up at seven their time every day. Which is six here. Booooo...**


	21. Cantankerous

**A/N: Hey, you lot! Sorry for the (one day) late update, but Germany has given me so much backlog, I just couldn't find time yesterday! Also, my grandparents are visiting from Canada for a month on Thursday, so any updates due during that time may happen, may not happen, or may be early/late. The Easter hols start next weekend, which is good for free time, but I'm gonna have a crapload of visitors to deal with...sorry.**

**And, an announcement. Well, two. One more important than the other. You know what? I'm going to start with the less important one.**

**WE HAVE REACHED OVER 200 REVIEWS! That is...amazing. The most (by far!) that I've ever had for any story. Then again, this is the longest story I've ever written by quite a large margin. I wasn't sure it was going too well, but...YAY!**

**Second thing is, I've decided this fic is definitely coming to a close. I already have a new fic idea, two chapters of which have already been betaed (I HAVE A BETA!) by Rainbow Fruit Loop. If you like Death Note, Mello and Near, feel free to check it out (when I've uploaded it). *self-advertises shamelessly***

**Thanks so much to all of you for sticking with me throughout this verryyy long fic; I luvvoo all! See you next time! (I'm talking like this is the last chapter. We're going to have at least two more, don't worry!)**

**Credit for this word chapter goes to Keiren-Kun89! And on that note, I have about a million word requests that I haven't used, and, as this fic is ending, probably never will. Sorryyyyyy! But I have one I definitely DO plan to use, (thank you, sun and moon!) and the next chapter may be one of you lot's word requests, or it could be one of my ideas if I can't find one that fits. (I planned a chapter properly! *gasp*)**

**Massive response to last chapter! (Which kinda makes sense, but anyway...) Thank you to:**

**Assault Godzilla**

**amychuzzle**

**Kriitikko**

**light within the darkness**

**Mashar**

**Audrey Londonburg**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Vixenlive**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon (Nonplussed=really, really confused)**

**Ice Prince Hitsugaya**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop (MY NEW BETA!)**

**Jimmy10.0**

**sagitgirlth**

**hariiiet**

**and AsomeM! That is a lot of people, guys. I can't even be bothered to count them all. XD**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to the fantabulous Kubo Tite!  
><strong>

Cantankerous

_Cantankerous: __disagreeable to deal with; contentious; peevish: a cantankerous, argumentative man._

If there was anything Matsumoto feared, apart from a worldwide sake shortage, it was a pissed off Yumichika.

His moods were sporadic and had no particular order to them, but most of them were usually caused by either Ikkaku or a lack of beauty in general. And _all_ of them were something to be avoided at all costs.

This one in particular, however, seemed to have been triggered by her own folly.

"I cannot _believe _you and Hitsugaya-taicho were trapped in a cave together and _neither_ of you made a confession of undying love! Denying your feelings is so unbeautiful, you know." The narcissist repeated for at least the fifth time, pouting very unbecomingly, but no way in hell was she going to tell him that.

"Uh…Yumichika, we weren't trapped. The barrier disintegrated. And what undying love?" Matsumoto asked him daringly, afraid of fuelling her friend's anger, but doing so anyway.

Yumichika adopted a horrified expression. "What undying love? Are you kidding me? _The_ undying, forever-and-always love between the pair of you that everyone except you two blockheads can see!" he shrieked, waving his hands around in the air, to Matsumoto's perplexity.

"Who's a blockhead?" came a cool voice from behind them.

Matsumoto and Yumichika both whirled round to stare guiltily at Hitsugaya, who had apparently just walked in the room. At least, Matsumoto _hoped_ he'd just walked in.

"Fifth Seat Ayasegawa, for your own safety, I'd advise you not to meddle with things that do not concern you. It is unbecoming of your position," Hitsugaya continued, sparing no thought for Yumichika's over-blown self esteem and his need to be 'becoming'.

Yumichika pouted again, clearly not pleased, but got up anyway. "My apologies," he muttered insincerely, before stalking to the door.

As an afterthought, he turned round and said to Matsumoto, "Just think about what I said. Open your eyes and you'll see." The man took it into his head that now might be a good time to flee for his life, and did so.

Matsumoto felt the temperature in the room drop a few degrees, then creep back up again. She risked a glance at her captain.

He seemed calm enough, but Matsumoto knew better than to ever judge by appearances. "What in the world could he be talking about, huh, taicho?" she staged, adopting an extremely fake smile.

Hitsugaya just looked at her patronizingly. "I heard the entire conversation, Matsumoto," he informed her.

"Oh."

"Still, I'm quite interested to know who started those rumours," Hitsugaya admitted, running a hand through his hair. "I wonder if they'd mind losing a couple of fingers…?" he growled, revealing his inner wrath.

Matsumoto winced. Poor person, whoever they were. "Is the idea of people thinking we're together that repulsive to you?" she asked, slightly injured, though for the life of her she didn't know why.

Hitsugaya didn't bother to soften his reply. "Frankly put, yes."

Matsumoto scowled at him. "Thanks for the amazing compliment," she said, with searing sarcasm.

"It wasn't meant to personally offend you, I just despise rumours." Hitsugaya defended himself uselessly.

"Personally offend me? Do I look personally offended to you? Oh, wait, yes I do. Maybe it's because I _am _personally offended, whatever your intentions were." she retorted, her scowl turning into a full-on glare.

Hitsugaya took an unconscious step back. Come to think of it, he hadn't seen her drinking for a while. Maybe she was on alcohol withdrawal. "Matsumoto, calm down. It's not the idea of us…being together that repulses me, it's just the fact that everyone's fantasizing about _our _business, when they should just leave it the hell alone."

Matsumoto paused in her rage. "Oh." she said, for the second time that day.

Hitsugaya was silent, waiting for his fukutaicho to say something else.

"So…you wouldn't mind us being together, as long as no one talked about it?" Matsumoto asked hesitantly.

Hitsugaya froze. He wasn't liking where this conversation was headed. "Not exactly. It would be very improper to have a captain/lieutenant relationship; the soutaicho doesn't like them."

"Just forget our positions for now. Would you mind us being together?" Matsumoto repeated insistently.

Hitsugaya shifted uncomfortably. This was getting increasingly awkward. "I don't know. I'm not sure it would work. Why does it matter, anyway?"

"Oh, it doesn't. I was just wondering what you see me as. Looks like the answer was 'Just a Working Partner and Nothing Else', huh?" Matsumoto spat scathingly, flouncing out of the room. "And don't get the wrong idea; I don't want to be together either. I just thought we had something a bit stronger than what you seem to see, that's all," she called huffily over her shoulder.

The small captain was left standing in the room by himself. It seemed an awkward silence didn't depend on having two or more people in the room after all.

_What the hell's going on?_ Hitsugaya thought wearily, running his hand repeatedly through his already messy hair. He was going to kill Ayasegawa for starting all this. When Matsumoto's own moods were triggered, she sometimes didn't forgive him for whatever he'd unconsciously done for weeks.

Hitsugaya sat down heavily, putting his head into his hands and sighing. He needed to work this out.

…

Matsumoto charged through the streets of Seireitei to get to her favourite Rukongai bar. She felt tears of anger prick rather painfully behind her eyes, but refused to let them fall. She wasn't actually angry at her taicho, surprisingly. She was just so confused as to what was going on with the two of them at the moment. One moment, her heart was squeezing almost painfully whenever he looked at her, and the next she was so angry with him she could chuck a vase at his head without remorse. But she wasn't angry with him…was she?

Matsumoto cursed under her breath. She'd known the abstinence from sake wouldn't go well; she'd only done it to please her taicho. She was acting hormonal now, and the only way to deal with hormones was to drown them in a sea of alcohol.

Matsumoto flung open the bar door and sat down heavily at the counter. "Pint of sake," she ordered tersely.

She didn't stop drinking for three hours.

**A/N: Oh dear. Matsumoto's not at all bipolar, is she? I had her acting a bit weird in this chapter on purpose, by the way. It was necessary. **

**This was a short chapter, I know, but technically, it's transitional. The next chapter will be good. I promise. (Read: I hope. You lot know how unpredictable I am. I COULD choose to blow them all up. But then I'd get hate mail. XD Don't think that'll stop me!)**


	22. Intoxication

**A/N: Sorry for the late update again, guys, I've been so busy! But it's here now, which is what matters, right?**

**Credit for this chapter title goes to...me! For probably the first time...ever. It's not very clever, but it fits the chapter fine, right?**

**This is probably the third-last chapter. Two more, then it's over! I don't think I'll be writing an epilogue...it might ruin it a LITTLE bit.**

**Awesome response to the last chapter! (And to think I'd been worried about losing readers after the massive long break that resulted from Germany!) Thanks so much to:**

**Anki-Shai**

**BlackDesires**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**Assault Godzilla**

**ChieLuvsBleach  
><strong>

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**Vixenlive**

**mdo49**

**TD-Fuzz**

**XxLight AngelXx**

**NightWishInTheAir**

**harriiiet**

**blackbubblez1012**

**and SkYeLiMiT! Lots and lots and lots of people, gaiz! Thank youuuuuu! ^^**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to the incredible Kubo-sensei!  
><strong>

Intoxication

Hitsugaya was sitting on the couch, feeling numb.

After Matsumoto had stormed out (God knew why), he'd been trying to analyse his previous actions and words to figure out what he might have said or done to have caused the event.

It wasn't going well.

All the theories he'd managed to come up with had either been ridiculous, impossible or just downright stupid.

He'd narrowed it down to two possible explanations that_ might_ have been true.

Either Matsumoto was playing some complicated prank on him, (which he doubted) or she wanted to have a stronger relationship than Captain/Lieutenant with him.

Hitsugaya cringed. It wasn't the thought of the whole relationship thing that made him shrink away, but the inevitable…_cooing_ that would take place after it was made public.

_That_ would be awkward.

Hitsugaya didn't like public confrontation; he was definitely a very introverted person.

He shook his head. That was _not_ the problem here. The problem was whether he was ready to enter a relationship with Matsumoto or not.

On one hand, they'd been just friends for so long (taicho and fukutaicho way before that) that it felt plain weird to consider anything else.

On the other hand, his…dreams had been getting quite insistent recently. He'd been getting them at least twice a week, and although it didn't go anywhere beyond a slightly heated make out session, he wasn't stupid enough to regard them as an anomaly of his subconscious. There was at least _some _lust there.

Then again, Matsumoto could just be PMSing and he could be reading _way_ too much into the whole scenario.

Hitsugaya groaned and slammed his head into his knees again. His mind was just going round in circles; it was annoying beyond belief.

And no, he should _not _be thinking about how pretty Matsumoto had looked with her cheeks flushed in anger.

…

Matsumoto knocked back another glass of alcohol, the fuzzy veil surrounding her already-clouded mind thickening that much more. The loud conversations and background noise had already deteriorated into a buzzing haze in the corner of her awareness; it wouldn't be long before she passed out.

Knowing, even in her less-than-sober state, that it wouldn't be helpful, convenient or smart to crash in a bar only half an hour away from closing time (it was a Sunday), Matsumoto got shakily to her feet, the world spinning around her sickeningly.

She stumbled out of the bar, feeling the cool night air pull her out of the drunken mist slightly.

She didn't even know why she was drinking so much, not really. Sure, she'd considered what it'd be like to adopt a more intimate relationship with her taicho, but it had always been in passing or a result of misplaced curiosity; she'd never expected his unknowing rejection to hurt so much.

Well, that was it, then. She'd fallen for the small captain, who knew how long ago.

"Whyyy…?" Matsumoto slurred irritably. She could've had almost anyone else (maybe short of the soutaicho). Why _him_ of all people; the one who had famously never indulged in a relationship even slightly above strong friendship?

She had absolutely no chance. He tolerated her at best, and shunned her at worst. He didn't explode at her when she'd done something to annoy him; she was nothing special. He just treated her like everyone else.

Matsumoto pouted mournfully. For once, it seemed the alcohol had sharpened her brain, allowing her to see for what it was the thing that her subconscious wishful thinking had portrayed in a rose-tinted light.

Unable to hold them back anymore, Matsumoto let the tears pricking behind her eyes slide slowly down her cheeks, crying all the more when they failed to wash away any of the debilitating sadness that had crippled her body and mind.

She needed to sleep; she knew from experience that everything always looked better in the morning. Maybe then she'd be able to work out a way to get over her unrequited feelings for her taicho.

Matsumoto started off towards her house, keeping her hands pressed to the wall of the alleyway for support. She wanted to go home.

…

If Hitsugaya had been worried about Matsumoto before, he was downright panicking now. The woman had been out for over five hours now; all the bars would be shut.

He knew how vulnerable Matsumoto could be in her intoxicated state.

He also knew exactly how many gangs and rapists hung about in the streets of Rukongai after dark.

Coming to a snap decision, Hitsugaya stood up hurriedly, grabbed a blanket to warm up his fukutaicho if—_when_—he found her. He then marched determinedly to the door.

It opened before he could touch it, making him jump backwards in alarm.

His eyes met with the bloodshot ones of Matsumoto, who was gazing at him in shock from the other side or the door.

…

He had been going to look for her. She could tell immediately by the relieved expression he was sporting. That and the fluffy pink blanket he normally wouldn't be seen dead with.

She'd been wrong. He did care about her, more than the general public at least; there was no way he'd go traipsing around half of Soul Society with a prissy blanket to look for Ikkaku, for example.

He was speaking now, but Matsumoto couldn't make out the words over the loud thumping in her ears.

The relief must have gone to her head, because there was no other reason why she'd be gripping his shoulders and crushing her mouth against his in this situation.

…

"Matsumoto! What were you thinking, running out like that? You could have gotten seriously—"

Hitsugaya froze at the feeling of Matsumoto's hot lips on his.

They were so soft. They tasted like alcohol, a substance he detested, but that was the only negative thing he could think about the whole sensation.

She was moving them against his own, softly, sweetly, encouraging him to do the same, to reciprocate the—

Hitsugaya stumbled backwards, cheeks flushing a bright red.

_Oh God_, he thought desperately, his mind in turmoil.

Had his fukutaicho really just kissed him?

He guessed that solved the mystery of why she'd stormed out, then.

But now there was a whole new mystery to figure out: what in the world was he going to do about her evident feelings _now_, when they'd already gone way past the point where they could have maybe been ignored.

**A/N: Slightly angsty, barely any dialogue, short and a bit weird. Hope you enjoyed! XP  
><strong>

**Just so you lot know, the description of Matsumoto's drunkeness is purely from my imagination. I dunno if that's what it really feels like or whatever, because I've never been drunk in my life. Not that I can remember, anyway...XD**

**Penultimate chapter next time! See you then! x**


	23. Kiss

**A/N: WOO! Late update again! ...Sorry. Essays to do...AND ARE DONE! *celebrates***

**First things first, HAPPY EASTER, EVERYONE! Eat a crapload of choclate and be sick: it's what today's for! XD**

**Soo...this is the penultimate chapter. I've decided the next one'll be a epilogue-type thing, quite short and slightly crack-ish. Looolll...I hope you guys'll like it. And this one too!**

**Credit for this word choice goes to sun and moon! Finally, huh? Sorry for waiting so long to use your request, but...yeah. XP**

**People to thank:**

**Vixenlive**

**Ziggygebs777**

**sagitgirlth**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**paypi**

**Jimmy10.0**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**Assault Godzilla**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**NightWishinTheAir**

**and YaoiIsMyAddiction! Yay, thanks to all of you for being lovely! X3**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite and...well, Bleach.  
><strong>

Kiss

Matsumoto opened her eyes blearily, allowing her to take in her cracking headache caused by the light before slamming them shut again.

"Buggeration," she muttered grouchily, pulling the covers back over her head. She wasn't coming out until the headache was gone. No way in hell.

_So much for things looking better in the morning_, she thought bitterly, using her amazing memory (that somehow prevailed through inebriation) to recall her thoughts the previous night.

So she'd staggered home, opened the door, and…

Matsumoto frowned. Just because she could remember the events didn't mean they were _clear_.

Oh, taicho had been there. His head was warping rather dramatically, but there was no way she'd mistake that hair.

And then she'd—

Matsumoto lurched upright, tumbling to the floor in the process.

"Ow…" she moaned, having opened her eyes so as to not mortally injure herself on the clutter lying haphazardly around her floor.

_I can't believe I actually kissed him, _she thought mournfully. There was no way in hell he'd be interested now. No one liked being slobbered all over by a pissed-beyond-reason fukutaicho.

At least, no one _honourable_ liked it.

"Matsumoto?" She froze. "Are you alright?"

Matsumoto whipped her head around, fixing her eyes on her taicho, who had just walked into the room with what looked like a mug of tea. Though it could just as easily have been hemlock.

"Taicho." Her rabbit-caught-in-the-headlights look was something to be admired, she was sure.

Hitsugaya sighed, running his free hand through his hair. "You remember, I take it?"

She didn't have to ask what he was talking about. "Unfortunately," she mumbled.

"Unfortunately?" Hitsugaya looked surprised and maybe just a tiny bit offended.

Matsumoto backtracked quickly. "No, no, not like that! I mean, unfortunately because I was being stupid and I embarrassed myself and I'm really sorry about that, taicho, you don't have to worry about me harassing you at work or anything, because I won't, well, not unless you want me to, which I doubt because there's no way you would and now you're trying to poison me with hemlock tea, and—"

"_Matsumoto._" He interrupted her.

She shut up, before glancing at him sheepishly. She knew perfectly well how much he hated her ranting.

To her surprise, there was actually a massive grin on his face.

"Nice to see you're back to normal, then." His smile was making her feel ever-so-slightly faint.

When had _that_ started?

"Huh?" was the best she could manage.

"Meaning you've been a bit depressed lately, and to be frank, it was irritating."

"Oh. Sorry," Matsumoto bowed her head. The fact that he had terminated their conversation proved that he did not want to reminisce on The Fail (as she had now christened it) more than necessary.

"Don't worry about it. I was joking, anyway." He shook his head amusedly and handed her the mug of tea. "Not a trace of hemlock," he told her when she sniffed it cautiously, just to be safe.

"Right," she smiled softly, accepting that he obviously wanted to preserve their friendship (for which she was grateful), but didn't want to take it any further.

"Matsumoto, I really don't like that look on your face. You look depressed again. Are you okay?" Hitsugaya asked her concernedly, eyes softening so much she wanted to cry. But that would make her headache worse.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she sighed. "Just the headache."

"Rubbish. What's really wrong?"

"…" He had always been sharp.

"Tell me, Matsumoto." he demanded, frowning at her.

"…It's really nothing." She didn't want to trouble him any more.

"Is it about the kiss?" he asked.

"…No," Matsumoto lied, stunned. How could he be so…_genius-like _at half past eight in the morning?

"That's rubbish too. Look, I'm sorry I reacted so badly, but really, it was surprise more than anything. That and confusion." He smiled again. She was going to faint if he kept doing that.

"No, you don't have to apologise," she told him. "It was my fault for forcing it on you in the first place."

Hitsugaya blinked. "Forcing it on me?"

"Well, yeah. You can't tell me you were expecting it."

"…No, not really. But isn't _forcing _ a bit of a strong word?" He was trying to lessen the blow for her, bless him. Shame it wasn't working.

"Taicho, if someone kisses someone else, and the someone else doesn't want it, that's called _forcing_." Matsumoto restrained herself from rolling her eyes. Really, it was like trying to educate a five year old on sexual intercourse.

"You thought I didn't _want_ it?" Hitsugaya was just flabbergasted now.

Matsumoto frowned in confusion. "…Yeah."

"What? But I thought—I could have sworn you—what on Earth are you—" Hitsugaya trailed off, which was probably a good thing, seeing as it looked like he was about to have a brain haemorrhage.

"Why would you want it, taicho?" Matsumoto didn't give him a chance to reply before continuing. "I'm an alcoholic, I irritate you, I never do any work, I break your stuff, I break your _house_, I embarrass you in front of the higher-ups, I'm not attractive to you in the least, I—"

"Matsumoto, shut up."

"Yes, sir." Matsumoto made like a clam.

"What you said just now…" Matsumoto cringed in unhappy anticipation. Here it came. "…Was complete garbage."

Okay, she wasn't expecting that one.

"Huh? But—"

"I thought I just told you to shut up." Clam Impression Mark Two. "Everything you just said was completely untrue except the bit about the alcohol. And I don't mind that as much as I did."

Matsumoto narrowed her eyes. "But I never do any work, and I broke your house."

"You actually do quite a lot of work. At least, you have recently, for you," Hitsugaya amended, "And blowing up my house was a one-time thing. I hope, anyway," he looked at her worriedly.

"Don't worry, taicho, I don't plan on making a habit of it." Matsumoto smiled slightly at her own joke.

Hitsugaya let out a small chuckle. "But anyway, we're getting distracted. What I'm _trying_ to say is that you weren't forcing it on me, and I did, in fact, want…it?" He finished uncertainly, taken by surprise by her incredulous expression.

"You _what_?" Matsumoto was seconds away from freaking out.

"Uh…I wanted—oh, you heard me." Hitsugaya gave up, crossing his arms over his chest and blushing_ comme une tomate_.

His tomato face was ridiculously cute.

Matsumoto still hadn't quite absorbed the revelation yet. "You…wanted it?" Nod. "But why? I mean, there's no reason that you should, seeing as I—"

Matsumoto was rather rudely interrupted (_again_) by her captain. Though this time he had effectively cut off all her means of communication. _With his mouth_.

Matsumoto sat, stunned, until the situation dawned on her. Then she wrapped her arms tightly around her captain's waist and kissed him back ferociously.

Their lips parted for a second, their faces still touching, before the two reconnected passionately, decades of sexual tension finally being released.

…

"Come on, guys, we gotta go put this note under Shiro-chan's pillow! Then he and Boobies will _definitely_ get together!" Yachiru hurried along, waving a bit of crayoned-on paper in the air.

"Do you think Hitsugaya-taicho will fall for this one?" Kiyone whispered quietly to her sister.

Isane shook her head. "Only when he suddenly decides he enjoys saunas."

The SWA huddled outside Matsumoto's door, waiting for Nemu to pick the lock. She was done in a few seconds, the lock slipping free with a soft _'click'_ and allowing the group entry.

They crept inaudibly down the corridor, fearing Hitsugaya's inevitable wrath if he discovered them.

As they snuck past Matsumoto's room, Kiyone happened to glance through the open door.

"_Meep_," she squeaked quietly.

Isane looked at her in confusion, then followed her sister's finger to where it was pointing.

She swiftly grabbed the collar of Yachiru's robe, halting the girl's progress and dragging her towards the doorway.

Yachiru looked on, then turned around and started heading back the way they came.

The rest of the group followed, not quite sure how the lieutenant was going to react. She was notorious for being quite unpredictable.

When outside, Yachiru faced the group with a grin almost bigger than her face. "I told you the cave thing worked!" she announced proudly.

They all smiled and nodded, with the exception of Nemu, who just nodded. Sometimes it was best to just agree with the small fukutaicho.

**A/N: Haha! Shame, poor Yachiru. So deluded...**

**I'm not going to ramble on this time! See you next time! ;^) (I love that smiley)**


	24. Vicious Cycle

**A/N: So here it is! The final chapter, though it's more of an epilogue. And really short. But hey, I enjoyed writing it sooo much! (I think I'm a bit of a sadist. You'll see why later on.)**

**Anywaysss...credit for the word request goes to me! Woo! (I really don't know why I'm proud of that.)**

**After this fic, I'm going to be posting my Death Note fic thingy called The Fall. It is much, _much_ shorter than this; only around six chapters. But those of you who like MelloxNear, feel free to take a look! *shamelessly self-advertises***

**After that...I really don't know. I might take a break, as it'll probably be exam season by that time, and just _thinking_ about all the crap I'll have to do is making me feel sick, so...bum.**

**I was so pleased with the response to the last chapter! And OMG, just got another review! Literally, right this second! (I have my email open right now)**

**Thanks to:**

**A Self-Deprecating Person (for whom I am now BETAING!) **

**NightWishInTheAir**

**Distr3sSweet**

**El Frijolero**

**ChieLuvsBleach**

**Da Two Peoples, aka Winter Lover in the Snow and Hyorinmaru Stole My Bacon**

**marife7**

**Assault Godzilla**

**dragonballzlover2499**

**sagitgirlth**

**sun and moon**

**ichihimenaruhina shipper345**

**Rainbow Fruit Loop **

**and kyojori! (Who reviewed like, three seconds ago!) XD**

**Thanks so much, and hopefully see you lot around some time!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach or any of its characters. All credit goes to Kubo Tite and his awesome manga! (I don't watch the anime, but apparently the ending sucked. My friend showed it to me on Youtube. I am compelled to agree. What did you guys think?)  
><strong>

Vicious Cycle

"Hey, Matsumoto."

"Hm?" Matsumoto prompted through her large mouthful of chocolate cupcake.

"The soutaicho says my house is nearly finished. Apparently they only need to relay the tiling and paint the walls now," her captain (and now boyfriend, though he wouldn't admit it) informed her.

Matsumoto blinked. "…Oh," she said, less than enthusiastically, swallowing the sticky sweet.

Hitsugaya raised an eyebrow. "Why so sad? I'll still be coming to visit, but if we decide to have supper here, _I'm _cooking, okay?" he bargained.

"Okay!" Matsumoto agreed cheerfully, much happier now she knew she wasn't going to be dumped for a _house_, of all things. Not that she'd expected as such, of course.

"Anyway, I was wondering if we could go see it. I want to check they haven't made a mess of the plastering or whatever."

"Sure, I don't mind! It'll be fun, like a picnic!"

"…Yeah."

…

Nanao stared at Yachiru, her eyes bugging in an uncharacteristic display of panic. "Please tell me I just misheard you, Kusajishi-fukutaicho," she begged.

"Nope!" Yachiru was oblivious to her pain. "I think Boobies and Shiro-chan will be pleased! They'll get to spend _lots_ of tie together now!"

Nanao pinched the bridge of her nose, wishing in vain for a painkiller of some sort. Though cyanide would suffice. "I knew you'd decided to get Hitsugaya-taicho and Matsumoto-san together, and with all due respect, I'm surprised it actually worked, but did you really have to go _this_ far?"

"Why not?" Yachiru asked, honestly confused.

Nanao gave up. "Don't worry, just never involve me in things like this again. And if Matsumoto-san asks, I have absolutely no knowledge of this whatsoever. _None_," she stressed.

Yachiru jumped up, beaming. "Okay!" she chirped.

…

"You ready, taicho?"

"Yes, thank you, Matsumoto, but was covering my eyes really necessary?" Hitsugaya asked wearily, despite being amused.

"Of course! Now get ready to behold your lovely, brand new houussse…" Matsumoto trailed off.

"Matsumoto?"

There was silence for a couple of seconds.

Suddenly, Matsumoto clamped her hands down even more firmly over Hitsugaya's eyes and forced him to turn around again. "You know what, taicho, maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all! Let's go back and eat watermelon, okay?" she bribed somewhat desperately.

Hitsugaya was immediately (and rightfully) suspicious. "Matsumoto, what is wrong with my house?" he asked tersely.

"Nothing! Nothing at all! Now, how about that watermel—"

Hitsugaya wrenched his fukutaicho's hands from his eyes and turned around.

He nearly keeled over.

"…Who…did this?" he strangled out, his throat constricting in pure rage.

"Uh…I dunno, but it probably wouldn't be productive to murder them, so maybe we should just go…?"

"Matsumoto, they blew up my house. _Again_!" Hitsugaya nearly screamed.

"Yes, taicho, I can see that. But look on the bright side: at least you'll be able to spend more time with me!" Matsumoto tried (and failed) to comfort him.

"Why? Why, _every single time_, must it be me?" Hitsugaya numbly asked no one in particular.

"Now, that's just untrue. And depressing. Let's go eat that watermelon, huh?" Matsumoto took his hand and started gently leading him back to her (fully intact) home.

Hitsugaya could only follow, too in-shock to do much else.

He was sure of only one thing.

Whoever had done this would _pay_.

_Finis_

**A/N: Nooo, it's over! *cries***

***gets over it***

**You know what I find really funny? When people put a story on Alert after the last chapter's been uploaded. So, if guys don't want me to laugh at you, don't bother. It's definitely done.**

**Very definitely.**

**Sorry and all. XD**

**See ya next time!**

**~tii-chan17  
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